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BJ and the Bear: S2 E19 The Girls on the Hollywood High

Originally aired on February 23, 1980
Directed by Bruce Bilson
Teleplay by Glen A. Larson
Story by Glen A. Larson and Ron Friedman

 A little teaser:

Guess who that woman is staring at BJ

Did you know that trucker B.J. McKay has a sister? Did you know her name was Shauna? Did you know she was a film student in Los Angeles? Did you know B.J. and her talk at least twice a week? Did you know she vanished after being last seen with her best friend at an entertainment lawyer's coke party in the Hills?

BJ's sister's best friend

(She's not well)

I didn't. Not until I watched this episode. It sounds like 100% Grade A Bologna to me. But this next statement might be the most surprising. (Well, possibly.)

 Is that BJ's sister?

Oh yes! That's BJ's sister all right

Did you know that this episode is a backdoor pilot featuring the two detectives from The Eyes of Texas? 

But not quite the same two detectives. I'll explain it a moment, although I did mention it briefly in the previous review.

Things don't get less confusing

This episode starts off really shambolically. About five minutes in, I thought "This is going to be a train wreck." Why? Voice-over from  B.J. over the first two scenes. The opening scene is at the Hollywood party where a young woman overdoses and dies while in the presence of a "big Hollywood director." The lawyer who is throwing the party and a goon dispose of the body. But, B.J.'s sister sees what's going on and they kidnap her.

 BJ's kidnapped sister

Kidnapping goon

That's fine and dandy. But, B.J. talks over the first half of it. He tells us what we're seeing rather than allowing us to just see it. So when it cuts from people partying to a gal on the floor dying, it feels like we're watching a recap. And, it feels like we missed a scene introducing the dead woman and her friend who turns out to be B.J.'s sister. The setup is missing, replaced by didactic voice-over, which gets worse.

Lawyers and Goons

A winning combination

The next scene is at the Detective agency where Heather and Carolyn (or Caroline, it's tough to say) work in Texas. Before the women arrive, B.J. is seen talking to Eve Arden and Michael Pataki, who run the place. But, the voice-over continues. It tells us what's happening in the scene, instead of letting the scene happen. (It's like the cop's voice-over in Frozen Scream.) When the women walk in, the voice-over stops and never happens again. However...  when the women walk in, as you can see from the screenshots above, one might become confused.

This was on my copy

I'm not sure what it has to do with BJ's sister

First, however, what the hell's up with that voice-over? It's never happened before, it never happens again. It's very sloppy and bad storytelling. My guess? This episode was originally meant to run longer. It originally began spending some time following two young women in film school. They end up at the party. The events we see occur. Then, the "B.J.'s sister" reveal happens.

Good times at the detective agency

Hey! Arden and Pataki!

Followed by some time spent with B.J. as he tries to get hold of his sister. He can't. So, he goes to hire Heather and Caroline. (I would ask: why? I don't remember them being the most competent detectives. Heather was sassy and headstrong. Caroline was slightly ditsy and played the "I'm hot" card a lot.) That's when we see him at the agency.

Meeting the ladies again

(Or, at least, some ladies)

Maybe it was meant to be in a 90-minute slot. When Larson found out it would be 60, he cut down everything prior to the gals' arrival to the barest minimum? That is a guess. It does explain it pretty well though. I'm hoping he didn't actually write it this way because it is very sloppy.

The last of the problems is with the women themselves. In Eyes, Heather was blonde and a bit of a con artist. She was also presented as being kind of a Plain Jane. Caroline was brunette and attractive. She was the one you had dance in a bathing suit to distract bad guys. When the two women enter the detective agency and B.J. greets them warmly with hugs and kisses, something is askew. There is a brunette and a blonde. But, the blonde is Heather Thomas...  and she's Caroline who was the brunette from the previous episode. And the brunette is the blonde from the previous episode with a dye job. Plus, Caroline's sexuality is never used to their advantage. She's presented as a no-nonsense straightforward gal. (In fact, apart from Pataki's character, the fact that they're women never really comes up.)

We're confused too but we got over it

It's all very confusing and Rebecca Reynolds looks so different that it took me two viewings to connect her to the previous episode. I'm not sure why they did this and it makes a very confusing episode opening even more so.

Take deep breaths and enjoy Pataki's wardrobe

However, once the investigation begins, things get better and better. We already know what the bad guys are up to. (They've got Shauna at a Malibu Beach house. If she doesn't agree to keep her mouth shut, they'll kill her.) So there is no real mystery. Just the investigations from the detectives. They meet up with Stuart Pankin who is shooting some porn. (He's not playing the same character here that he played in Season 1. More confusion.) They run into a cop car twice and eventually recruit his help. In a completely surprising scene, they go the L.A. Coroner's office. Heather watches some "Jane Doe" videos to see if they can find Shauna or her friend. The coroner on the video is Sam from Quincy! What? Quincy and BJ and the Bear take place in the same universe!

Sam!

The contrasting styles of the detectives works nicely to keep the investigation moving. There are two nice twists in the second half that honestly surprised me. As it draws to a close and Shauna's end draws near, things do get tense. I applaud the show for pulling itself out of that morass that it almost got lost in early on. Eve Arden doesn't have much to do. (And, she's always Miss Brooks to me.) Pataki gets a minor subplot that would have certainly been developed if it went to series but here ends up getting in the way a bit. However, at the end, B.J. and his sister (?) are reunited. So that's a good thing.

A little break for

Wacky Fun With That Cop

I hope Heather and Caroline had a lot of fun adventures. I would have watched the show. (Although, why B.J. went to Texas to recruit two detectives to go to Los Angeles, when he could have just hired an LA detective stymies me. But, some days, I get stymied easy. I need some B.J. voice-over to lead me out of this.)

"Dan finished his review and decided it was time to put up the results. But first, he posted a few more screenshots from the end of the episode. Then, he put a caption on them."

Thanks, BJ. Does your sister have a boyfriend?

 Rescuing Shauna

 Shauna in the trunk!

Never have two people been so happy to find a

live body in the trunk of a car

Bye, Ladies.

Torchy Blane.. Playing with Dynamite (1939)

 
And the Torchy Blane saga ends. Nine movies, three years, a big pile of entertainment. Glenda and Barton are gone. Jane Wyman takes up the mantle of Torchy. Allen Jenkins takes over as Lt. McBride. How do they fare? Surprisingly well. Actually.

 It's Reagan calling Wyman on set!  (Not really.)

Jane Wyman dives right into the wisecracking and the sass of Torchy's character. Allen Jenkins can handle the blustery comedy. (If you don't believe that Sh! The Octopus is one of the best movies ever, than you need some new beliefs.) Tom Kennedy stands proud (and wrestles a lot) as Gahagan. The movie itself starts off with a bullet-pace. A crook named Denver Eddie is pulling a lot of heists. His girlfriend, Jackie, is put in jail. Torchy gets herself put in jail to try to befriend Jackie and track down Eddie. It all ends up in San Francisco at a wrestling arena. Turns out that Gahagan was a wrestling champ. And, Torchy and Steve may receive a reward that will allow them to put a down payment on their dream house.

 Torchy & Steve

Jane Wyman is lovely. She doesn't have the slightly off-kilter good looks of Glenda. She looks like a beauty queen. (She's also around 13 years younger than Glenda and around 17 years younger than Jenkins.) She does a great job at Torchy. She seems game for anything in the same way that Lola Lane was ready to flop around in the ocean to catch her crook. Jane's Torchy gets into the thick of a prison brawl and goes deep undercover. And she does it with a vivacity and spirit that is very much like the reporter gal characters of the period. Actually, her performance, while charming, is the one thing that distracted me about the film.

 Your Grandma's version of Orange is the New Black

Torchy Blane in Panama felt odd. It began strangely with the parade and the bank robbery. It was all buoyed by Lola Lane's slightly off-kilter interpretation of Torchy (cool but weird). Plus, it felt as if the movie was trying rather hard to be different from the films that came before it. Apart from the new angle of Torchy going undercover, Torchy Blane..  Playing with Dynamite, feels like the next Torchy Blane film. But, the regular stars aren't there. Jane Wyman is almost trying too hard to be like Glenda Farrell here. It feels like a remake of a Torchy film with a different lead actress. She's fun to watch but it feels a bit too much like she's mimicking Glenda. That's not a bad thing. It's just something I noticed. Maybe this shouldn't have been a Torchy film? They could have given her her own character and she could have had a great series. (They did, actually, in Private Detective later that year. -Ed.)

 Always embarrassing

There are some individual moments within the film that are interesting. First, as mentioned, the whole film moves quite quickly, which is nice. There's never time to be bored because it's always up to something, especially in the first quarter. Second, the whole film is predicated upon a huge coincidence. Torchy is stopped by a police officer, like in Blondes At Work. This time she ends up in court where she sees Jackie, the moll, getting sent away to the pokey. That sparks her mind to get put in prison. It drives the film, which is good. But, I don't normally notice these big plot coincidences so it may be a bit too obvious. Then, there's the wrestling tangent.

 Torchy Blane & Denver Eddie. Two great names that

do not go great together.

This part of the movie almost feels like something that could have wound up in a 1930s version of Pulp Fiction. Gahagan used to be a professional wrestler. He is revealed to be wearing his Champion Wrestling belt under his plainclothes. He becomes a professional wrestler again so he and Steve can remain undercover and not give their game away to the SF police. Suddenly, Gahagan is in the ring fighting an old rival and the film climaxes there. It's a strange tangent that comes out of nowhere but fits into the film. Maybe not perfectly but it fits.

Practicing faces for the final fade out

Torchy Blane... Playing with Dynamite ends the series on a note of hope, as if they felt more were in the future. Torchy doesn't actually do much reporting here. She acts more like a female undercover cop. But, the dynamic between her and Steve is still there (setting aside the age difference) and Gahagan is still goofy. When Our Heroes are assembled in the wrestling arena and get a final moment together...  then the picture fades out...  I was hoping it wouldn't be the end. Sadly, it is.

It's over! I can't believe it either

Torchy Runs For Mayor (1939)

And Glenda Farrell officially says goodbye to the Torchy Blane series (along with Barton MacLane). It happens in a movie that feels sort of like the last episode for the series. There will be some SPOILERS here so be warned. The story is this: Torchy begins writing a series of stories about a Dr. Dolan who is adversely influencing the Mayor. Torchy gets a lot of heat. The mayor is killed. Dolan takes over. Torchy runs against him.

 The Gang's All Here

In this movie, Torchy gets fired from her paper, which seemed like something that would never happen. She jumps from paper to paper trying to get her stories on Dolan published. Gahagan is demoted down to uniformed beat cop. The talk of marriage between Torchy and Steve returns, with a vengeance. And, at the very last moments in the picture, everything seems like it has reached its natural dramatic conclusion in the series. Maybe not the most advantageous ending for Torchy but McBride makes a good living.

 Hooray! Torchy has a great hat!

Torchy Runs For Mayor, as a title, is like Friday the 13th Part 8: Jason Takes Manhattan in that it is a little misleading. Jason doesn't actually get to the Big Apple until the last half-hour. Torchy doesn't get nominated for Mayor until 40-ish minutes into this 60 minute film. SPOILER: She wins! The film has her proclaimed as a candidate, then immediately kidnapped by Dolan. She spends the rest of the movie in a daze until the last couple minutes. So, it's not really Torchy campaigning. That's the plot point that gets the final act moving.

As a film, this one isn't as strong as the previous one (Torchy Blane in Chinatown) but it's pretty good, providing one can forget the suspect ending. It moves at a a brisk pace. The mystery angle is dispensed with but as Torchy goes from paper to paper trying to get her story sold, and failing, things begin to become a bit desperate. When she gets kidnapped and stashed in a country cabin, it culminates with a great house-wide brawl with McBride, Gahagan and thugs. Plus, there's a bomb in Steve's car! It's funny, fast-moving good times with lots of great Torchy hats.

 Trust me, there is a heck of a brawl going on here

The Torchy Blane movies have been an interesting series. The main cast is always good. Yes, Gahagan may get too dumb on occasion. Plus, it's tough to gauge Steve sometimes. He really seems to love Torchy in some of the films. Then, in others, he seems less interested in her and more interested in yelling. The plots have been hit and miss. The mystery-filled ones have, generally, been more fun to watch than the ones that are standard cops and reporters and crooks. Something about the mystery match-up/ rivalry made them more, kind of, delightful. And, of course, there is Glenda Farrell, who is consistently fantastic even when she's given stuff to do that's not quite right for Torchy.

Glenda, you're cool

Overall..  what? What did you say? There's another one? With Jane Wyman as Torchy? And Allen Jenkins from Sh! The Octopus? Does he play Steve? Huh... This could be the best (or worst) movie ever. Hang on, folks. #9 is on the horizon.

Shh, Jane Wyman is rehearsing...

Torchy Blane in Chinatown (1939)

The seventh film in the Torchy Blane series is my favorite since Adventurous Blonde. It has a fun mystery, a quick pace, lots of Torchy being sassy and William Beaudine at the wheel. It also has a strange attitude towards Torchy that has been persisting for a few films now. And, the romance/ possible wedding of Torchy and Steve seems to be something the series has forgotten about. Oh well.

Torchy just being cool

Glenda Farrell is awesome here, as always. She actually wears a formal dress for an engagement party. She looks great. She slaps Gahagan in the stomach a lot. She argues with McBride. And, she has her life threatened by a piece of paper in a matchbook. Some of Torchy's best lines are in this movie, including one about balconies bringing out the Juliet in her. I'm so glad they got her back in the series.

Matchbook threats

The actual mystery is a good one here. Several men involved in taking jade treasures from China are threatened by what seems to be a Chinese gang of some sort. They are told they will die at midnight. And, several people do die at midnight in entertaining ways. One man is decapitated in a car crash. I'm not sure that happened often in 1939. The "Oriental" angle is mysterious enough to keep everyone guessing, except Torchy who is always on top of things. I appreciate the return to mystery.

Someone just slapped someone in the gut

But, sadly, the return to mystery doesn't actually involve Torchy and McBride working together. Quite a few scenes in this film are set up this way: Police, including McBride, show up at a house. They talk to people about the killings. Torchy, generally, sneaks in and is derided. But, she's a step ahead of everyone else so she is tolerated. That happens a lot in this movie. By the end, Torchy has ingratiated herself with the people who are being threatened, which is a relief, but it still feels somewhat strange.

I think Dick Tracy lives on this street

The odd part about Torchy Blane in Chinatown is the way they show Torchy solving the mystery. I won't give away who the bad guy is but  I will mention, real quick, the way the movie wraps itself up. There is a meeting on a boat way, way out on the water. And Torchy isn't there. McBride isn't there. Gahagan isn't there. It's a guy meeting up with three masked crooks. Then, they are caught and unmasked. That's when the odd thing happens.

Looking good, T.B.!

Torchy proceeds to explain everything that's been going on. How she figured out who these crooks were and the steps she went though. But, they've already been caught...  by someone else. It's like a James Bond movie ending with the bad guy being stopped by someone who wasn't James and then Our Hero stepping in and explaining what just happened. It's a good ending, explanation-wise, but it doesn't do much Torchy-wise. It feels like a misstep in a movie that was pretty solid right up to that point.

Gahagan in "Backing Into Hilarity!"

The movie isn't ruined by this ending. It just leaves an odd taste in one's mouth. The way the ending of Blondes At Work did. Our Hero(ine) shouldn't stand by and watch the ending. She should be a part of it. Well, this film brought back the mystery. Maybe Film #8 (the last with Farrell) will rectify the other problems. Maybe?


Poetry and submarines don't mix!

Torchy Gets Her Man (1938)

The title might not be completely correct.

Glenda Farrell is back! Hooray! (Although I did like Lola Lane, the George Lazenby of Torchy Blanes.) Barton MacLane is back! Haroo! Gahagan never left. What does the sixth film in the land of Torchy hold in store for us? Well, honestly, not the best of the films. The mystery angles from the first four have been dropped. They seem to be sticking with a standard crime caper kind of thing like they did in Torchy Blane in Panama. I prefer the mysteries. But, then I didn't like the romance bits in A Night at the Opera and, apparently, audiences went for them. So, I may not know what I'm talking about.

Yeah!

In Torchy Gets Her Man, the gang is on the trail of a counterfeiter with the nickname of "100 Dollar Bill." That's a great name. A Secret Service Agent named Mitchell shows up at the police station and enlists McBride's help. Shenanigans occur. They go to a big racetrack where the counterfeiters are in full swing. But, Torchy, with Gahagan and a German tracking dog, takes another route and finds out what is really going on. In the end, her and Gahagan are tied up in a country house with a bomb inside it! Can McBride save her in time? Should McBride need to save Torchy? Isn't part of the fun of these movies that Torchy doesn't need to be saved by all the guys? Well, she had to be saved in the previous film...  I guess that worked because it happens again here.

And she brought another one of those hats

I can't say that this film isn't entertaining. It's so great to see Glenda back. McBride is the same as ever. Gahagan is even goofier than usual. Luckily, this film has the great William Beaudine directing. He may have been denigrated back in the Golden Turkey days. But, anyone with an eye for entertaining movies can't help but enjoy his stuff. I've watched over 25 of Beaudine's films in the past year. And I've enjoyed all of them. This one is no different. In theory.

Headin' to the track!

There's something odd about this film. Back in Blondes at Work, I had expressed concern about the way the movie treated Torchy. She had seemed like such a strong, cool character in the early films. But, she was kind of punished for that. This film is even weirder. Torchy discovers what's happening. There's no murder mystery to solve but there's a double cross. And she has that dog and she had Gahagan. But, the big climax is her and Gahagan tied up, bomb ticking and struggling, while McBride rushes to the rescue. I know this was 1938 but it's not 1914. This isn't The Perils of Pauline. And, anyway, Pearl White used to do some amazing stunts. Glenda seems to be, kind of , working through the movie using a pre-approved set of "Torchy" mannerisms. Something has been lost.

I'd watch this road movie

I was hoping that the build-up of the first four films wouldn't be wrecked by the Lola Lane adventure. It hasn't quite...  But, this film doesn't have the same feel to it that the first four did. It's a bit more rote, a bit more average. It's fun to watch and it's never slow. But, it's never wonderful. And tying Torchy up seems wrong. At least, Torchy in the previous film got to sass while she was captured, waiting for McBride. Here, she can't and it's semi-disconcerting. I hate to read into it but.. Glenda left Warner Brothers. They wanted her to continue as Torchy. She said no. They tried someone else and it didn't work. Then, they got Glenda back. And if there's one thing people in charge (studio execs in particular) hate is having to beg. So, they made Torchy submissive throughout the climax here. And it doesn't suit her.

The Perils of Gahagan?

Torchy Gets Her Man is better than Blondes At Work. But, not better than any of the others. It starts off strong. The feeling I get at the beginning is sort of like when a TV show goes a way for a while and then comes back with the same folks in it and you hope that it will be the same as it was but it's not quite. Something's wrong. You can't quite put your finger on it but it's not really the same. (Futurama, Community and Absolutely Fabulous are three examples.) While it's good to have everyone back, I hope that the next film won't go further in this direction.

Should we have come back?

Return to the mysteries, please. Beaudine is good at them. Return to the charming repartee between Torchy and McBride. But, don't continue to denigrate Torchy and don't let the narratives become so standard. Number Seven is on the horizon. We'll see what's they have up their sleeve and what Torchy will wear on her head.

I just like this image. 
Man Steals Detour Sign! Film at 11!