Tuesday, February 19, 2019

HEY, THERES NAKED BODIES ON MY TV!

Directed by Mack Campbell
Media Home Entertainment VHS

THE FILM
The title is not referring to us watching it at home but the fact that characters from TV shows we loved are suddenly naked on the big screen, right before our eyes. If this movie had been made in the 60s, the three shows chosen would have been Hazel, The Munsters and Bonanza and it would have been a very “interesting” movie. Mainly for pervs. But, in the 70s, things are just perfect. The movie consists of three segments parodying Happy Days, Welcome Back Kotter and Barney Miller. And, the parodies are filled with naked people. Most of these naked people are having an awesome time, probably due to their nudity.

In its own special way, this movie is superb. Setting aside the nudity, we have…A strange linking device in a TV studio with a janitor and a naughty clown. There are very odd pornographic cartoons that keep cropping up. There’s a “Very Special” montage at the end. And, there are the parodies themselves. Having been a fan of Happy Days and been familiar with the other shows, they feel pretty right to me. Kotter is set in the classroom. Barney Miller is set in the police station. Happy Days is set in The Fonz’s (The Bonz!) apartment. Each bit goes on a little too long. Nude people dancing around and groping one another (although the guys don’t always get that nude) can only sustain one for so long. The Happy Days segment is more of a series of naughty couples coupling. The other two are just piles of nudity….and all of it is covered with…a laugh track!

That’s the super-special touch. The very first time the laugh track goes off…the movie enters another realm. It’s so simple and yet so perfect. The actors are different, yes. But, a lot of the jokes were no worse or better than the actual jokes in the shows themselves and the characters are the same. The laugh track nudges every parody that much closer to being exactly like the original show and, by extension, making everything that much naughtier.

What a strange adventure this film is…I’ve had this tape for years but never thought to review it until right now…The film is so obscure and so strange. Where’d it come from? I don’t have to ask why it was made. I can guess that. Was there another version with raunchier stuff in it? Did the casts of the actual TV shows ever see this? So many questions…

I will admit to some boredom while watching, though. Each segment has its set-up and then the nudity begins and it kind of goes on a few minutes past the point when good structural taste would say “Give it a rest.” But, aren’t most of these films like this? I don’t know. I actually haven’t seen a lot of them. I find it can be hard to watch them.

Hmmm….In the end, I’m not sure these softcore extravaganzas are for me. What can you say about them? Luckily, this one is goofy and strange and it runs a proud and erect rampage over a nostalgic part of my mind, which I appreciate. I really think they should have chosen a fourth show. Laverne & Shirley? Think of the possibilities. The filmmaker struggles to get the film up to a certain running time are amusing but not always thrilling. Lenny and Squiggy and Mrs. DeFazio…Let your mind wander. What exactly is a Squiggy?

AUDIO AND VIDEO
Look at that cover! This VHS tape is a brick. I could slap someone with it and knock them loopy. It looks and sounds as good as the day it rolled off the assembly line. (Hundreds of copies!) And, of course, constant comedic arousal is stimulated by the off-kilter sounds of the laugh track.

EXTRAS
Nothing. But, the video box is one big ad for “The World of VHS”! So, that’s pretty salty.

FINAL THOUGHTS
Once a year, I watch this movie and have a good time. It is a Classic 70s softcore film, in its own way. The odd layout of the film mixed with the strange set-up combined with some lovely nudity make me say “I saw naked bodies on my TV. Hey…”

And then, a crowd of people I can’t see laugh uproariously. We sank back in our chairs exhausted.
07/08/10