tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-50165942728154030082024-03-05T12:09:58.125-08:00Some Polish American Guy Reviews ThingsA series of reviews and random bits of pop culture ephemera that I'm watching, reading, listening to or whatever. Daniel B?http://www.blogger.com/profile/15523815647063071939noreply@blogger.comBlogger221125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5016594272815403008.post-33073972593046635682023-01-11T07:02:00.001-08:002023-01-11T07:02:18.213-08:00Lucan is here.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi8e_glfknZbeMNgbSJarfAi3cmVIG-63n1PJ1X05SefBKHF0tkZnR7N5M3-Bn4rhfpopqqgHi6mshG3HKn0s8fFpGeoc9yQOz383yyfJUDArEX0FtPXfqpRHbi-jphINkx_R_qZaLu3vVYgxEO7NwUt34aVVZUr_F_o81G7WS3qC20mFygv_68PthAwA/s753/MV5BZTBlYTA3NjAtYWZkMi00ZDY2LTgyNzgtZjI0MzFlOTgyMDEwXkEyXkFqcGdeQXVyMjUwMDUwNA@@._V1_.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="753" data-original-width="592" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi8e_glfknZbeMNgbSJarfAi3cmVIG-63n1PJ1X05SefBKHF0tkZnR7N5M3-Bn4rhfpopqqgHi6mshG3HKn0s8fFpGeoc9yQOz383yyfJUDArEX0FtPXfqpRHbi-jphINkx_R_qZaLu3vVYgxEO7NwUt34aVVZUr_F_o81G7WS3qC20mFygv_68PthAwA/s320/MV5BZTBlYTA3NjAtYWZkMi00ZDY2LTgyNzgtZjI0MzFlOTgyMDEwXkEyXkFqcGdeQXVyMjUwMDUwNA@@._V1_.jpg" width="252" /></a></div><p>Welcome to 2023!</p><p>The first episode of <i>Eventually Supertrain</i> this year welcomes a brand-new old show into the fold: LUCAN! A boy raised by wolves goes on adventures! But not with wolves! (Unless you count Ned Beatty.) In this episode, Dan and his <a href="https://tvmayhempodcast.wordpress.com/">very special</a> co-host discuss the 1977 TVM (titled LUCAN: THE WOLF BOY AND HIS AMAZING PSYCHEDELIC JOURNEYS*) that introduced us to this young man and his inspiring journey where he meets Ned Beatty.</p><p>Please, listen and enjoy.</p><p><a href="https://soundcloud.com/user-53996045">Soundcloud</a><br /></p><p><a href="https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/eventually-supertrain/id1136263578">Apple Podcasts</a><br /></p><p><a href="https://www.stitcher.com/show/eventually-supertrain">Stitcher</a><br /></p><p><br /></p><p>*That's a lie. It's really just LUCAN.</p>Daniel B?http://www.blogger.com/profile/15523815647063071939noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5016594272815403008.post-15552506882102686722021-06-04T11:24:00.001-07:002021-06-04T11:24:53.741-07:00Don't Go In The Woods<div style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; background-color: transparent; border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; color: black; font-family: &quot; font-size: 13px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; line-height: 19.5px; margin-bottom: 13px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; orphans: 2; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; text-align: left; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
My friends and I never had wild and crazy all-night parties back in high school. Usually, they took place at Matt Tobin’s house. Matt was the youngest of four and his parents knew that he was going to have parties so they just let it ride. We used to have people over, watch movies, eat pizza and laugh a lot. Matt and I (with our friend Eric) would usually pick up the videos a couple hours before the fun began.</div>
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A lot of strange movies passed through there. I remember I Spit On Your Grave<em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"> quieting everyone down. </em>Buried Alive (Beyond the Darkness)<em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">grossing out us and making us laugh. </em>Faces of Death 2<em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"> was watched while we ate pizza to see if anyone got ill. </em>Bad Taste<em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"> made us laugh a lot. There was only one film that Matt and I previewed before everyone showed up. The cover looked fun. It was a slasher and it was 1989. What teen could resist the call? It was called </em>Don’t Go In The Woods<em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"> — and we never made it past the first half hour.</em></div>
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(Let me just say that I could only start watching slasher films or gory films when I was around fourteen. But, I used to read about them a lot. I’d first read about Don’t Go In The Woods<em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"> when Joe Bog Briggs raved about it in </em>Joe Bob Goes To the Drive In<em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">. For once, his list of how people got killed fitted the movie perfectly.)</em></div>
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It was too good. We couldn’t believe our eyes. The music, the acting, the dubbing, the lack of any characterization for the people being killed. We couldn’t believe it. We laughed a bit but basically were stunned. We stopped the film after a while because we wanted to share it with everyone. Then, the party changed direction or ended early or something. We never saw the rest of it. But, what we did sat in our minds and never left.</div>
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I think most fans of Trash Cinema have an extremely voracious period. It’s like when you discover the world of jazz or classical music (or rock). You may start by finding one album you like. The first Jazz album that grabbed me was the Miles Davis collection under the Ken Burns’ Jazz line. One day, you stroll in the music store and that area (“JAZZ”) is no longer the area you pass through on the way to the DVDs. It’s now filled with all sorts of amazing music waiting for you to discover it. Start with Miles go to Coltrane go to Monk go to Ornette Coleman. They’re good for you. I went through the same thing with the Trash Films. Suddenly, all those films go from being things you ignore or look at and kind of don’t see to “Where do I start?” Alphabetically was tempting but would never work. (How long until I get to <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Zombie</em>?) So, you just start renting. If it looks good or has a great title or if it looks terrible, grab it. For every 4 films you’d rent, one would be a waste of time. One would be worth the viewing. One would be worth a second watch. One would go in The Library. Hello, <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Don’t Go In The Woods</em>.</div>
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I was at the start of my hoarding time when I saw the smallest portion of this insanity. Something from my formative years that really, really struck me and stuck with me. This isn’t nostalgia, though. As Walter Kerr said in his great book <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">The Silent Clowns</em>, “Nostalgia depends on the absence of what is longed for, survives only as recollection.” It fades when your re-encounter whatever it was years later. For example, I grew up with <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">The Electric Company</em>. I hadn’t seen it in more than 20 years. I bought the Shout Factory DVD set. It’s still great. Oh sure, there are bits where I say, “I remember this!” and the memories pour back but most of it is just plain good. Whereas I also grew up watching <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">The Munsters</em>, so I bought the first season DVD set when it came out. 12 episodes in, I was in pain. Unfunny and oh-so repetitive. I should have let nostalgia keep me warm there because that memory is now tarnished. Now, I don’t dive into TV shows I grew up with as quickly because once that nostalgia goes all you have is whatever you’re revisiting. And, if it isn’t for you or isn’t very good, it can be tough to grab those old memories again.</div>
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This article contains reminiscences but deals with a movie that is as vitally strange now as it was in 1997 and 1993 and 1989. It exists outside of time, in its own odd bubble, and is better because of it.</div>
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<em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">I went to college in Ithaca, NY. I watched a lot of “classic” films. A lot of great cinema. And, in my spare time, I drove down the hill into town and rented every sleazy or creepy thing I could find. It took a lot of driving and three video stores but Shows To Go had it: </em>Don’t Go In The Woods<em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">. I watched it once, alone. Then, I watched it with a group who came to feel as I did, “This film is nuts!” It seemed to be the most incompetent thing we’d ever seen. It was wild. Then, something weird happened.</em></div>
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Nights got very cold in Ithaca. On one of these nights (actually early morning, 2AM), I came home from somewhere to my tiny single room. I still had energy so I threw on Don’t Go In The Woods<em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"> and lay back in bed. The snow fell outside; my room was chilled because I’ve always liked it that way. I started watching. About fifteen minutes in, I was terrified. The music, the strange acting, the disconnected dubbing, the senseless killing of random people. It was almost too much. My survival instincts kicked in and I fell asleep during the manhunt portion of the film. But, the next day, I knew I had something special here. In a strange twist that you just can’t imagine, I ran into Matt on a semester break. He had a gift from the adult bookstore he worked in. It was one of those stores that had non-porno magazines and movies in the front and naughtiness behind the curtains. “I saw this and I had to grab it for you. Maybe someday we can watch it.” With a large $79.95 sticker on the front, </em>Don’t Go In The Woods<em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"> was handed to me. It is the VHS copy I still own today. Although, I’ve never watched it with Matt or any of my once-close friends from High School.</em></div>
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I used to play a game during this film called “Tell me the names of the four main campers”. Whoever could do it first, won nothing but smug self-satisfaction and a feeling of superiority over their peers. But, it shows something, I think. A certain element that some of the best Trash Films have. They don’t live in the same world that “regular” films do. You can expect nothing and you must to try to accept everything that you’re not expecting.</div>
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The lack of motivation for the killer is a good example of this. He probably does have motivation but it’s either implied or unimportant. It is not just a “revenge” motivated spree or an “I’m your mother’s cousin’s lover’s second wife” twist-thing. The actual plot of the movie is simplicity. All people who pass through a certain area of the Utah woods are viciously killed by a wild man who lives in a ratty, old cabin filled with knickknacks taken from his victims. When the disappearances get out of hand, the police go in to find him. In the end, well, watch it. It is a film that does not require you to pay attention to its plot but not because it’s plot is stupid but because it is so simple. Why do we not get the names of people who enter the woods? Because it is not important. The film is not about creating characters that you care about and then killing them. It’s about killing everybody with no rhyme or reason. It’s about setting up this crazed atmosphere and trying to keep it permeating through the whole film.</div>
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I can’t make a case for any of this idiosyncratic filmic behavior being intentional. Maybe when the DVD comes out it will transpire that James Bryan did have a huge master plan. He may have set a series of events in motion that led to his magnum opus of slasher horror. But, wouldn’t it be best if we just never found out? Why do we need to know everything about everything? Aren’t a few things best left shrouded in darkness?</div>
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Regardless, when the DVD arrives, you should go out and buy it. Support the companies that put out these great films. Whether the extras will entice you is another matter. I’m going to try and ignore them but I don’t know for how long. Maybe the DVD should include a remastered print and a “video” print so we can keep the film preserved on DVD but not have to lose the way we know it. From perusing the web, I’ve seen that a lot of people have heard about this film and, I think, will be severely disappointed when it’s readily available and it doesn’t turn out to be whatever they think it should be. (A movie like <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">The Last Slumber Party</em>, a favorite of mine, is almost never talked about by anyone so its DVD release was a wondrous bit of joy because it snuck in.)</div>
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It’s doubly tricky because the film was on the final Video Nasty list. So, it’s taken on a notoriety that it cannot hold up to under those circumstances. It’s a different sort of film from <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Cannibal Holocaust</em> or <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">The Beast in Heat</em> or, really, most of the European films that fill the list. It’s not the same sort of American horror as <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Last House on the Left</em> or <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Fight For Your Life</em>. It’s more in the area of <a href="http://bleedingskull.com/axe-1977/" style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; color: black; font-size: 13px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; text-decoration: underline;" title="Axe (1977)"><em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Axe</em></a> or <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Bloodeaters</em> or <a href="http://bleedingskull.com/damballa-or-bust-the-mysterious-films-of-jack-weis/" style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; color: black; font-size: 13px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; text-decoration: underline;" title="Damballa Or Bust: The Mysterious Films Of Jack Weis"><em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Mardi Gras Massacre</em></a>. People who know of the film from the Infamous List are going to be confused and dismissive. I think, in fact, most people will be less than thrilled unless they step into it relatively fresh, which might be impossible. Even the <a href="http://bleedingskull.com/dont-go-near-the-park-1981/" style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; color: black; font-size: 13px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; text-decoration: underline;" title="Don’t Go Near The Park (1981)"><em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Don’t Go Near The Park</em></a> DVD release had a prominent display of its “Video Nasty” status printed on it. They banned these films for all sorts of reasons. <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Don’t Go In The Woods</em> is gory and rather nasty but if you go in expecting an Italian cannibal feast or Nazi film or anything along those lines, you’ll be disappointed. You always get more than you expect from a deranged Italian film (<em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Patrick Still Lives</em> and the poker, anyone?) but you’re almost always on familiar ground. The films have a certain look, they share actors, and they have the same dubbed voices speaking for everyone. <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Don’t Go In The Woods</em> is all on its own. So, it’s easier to denigrate but, being so individual, it can be easier to appreciate, if you’re in the mood.</div>
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To those of you who do watch it and love it, come on in. There are a lot of us already at the bar wondering if James Bryan was a mental patient who did this before, after or for therapy. Some great films get better the more you know about them. <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Citizen Kane</em> is one of the best on any given day but you can appreciate it even more when you learn a little about film and what it did for the medium. Some films lose part of the joy when they get “fixed up” and you learn everything about them. Can anyone watch <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">The Evil Dead</em> now the same way people in the 80’s did? God Bless you if you can but the film’s too bright now and most people who come to it seem to arrive via <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Army of Darkness</em> so they can’t stop laughing. (I laughed here and there when I first saw it but it also scared me silly.) <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Don’t Go In The Woods</em> should remain hidden in obscurity. It should always be a vague sort of legendary thing. It won’t be after the DVD release, probably. We’ll have to see what happens. We can re-evaluate from there.</div>
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<div style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; background-color: transparent; border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; color: black; font-family: &quot; font-size: 13px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; line-height: 19.5px; margin-bottom: 13px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; orphans: 2; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; text-align: left; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">In early 1996, my friend, Scott, and I began having a weekly “Movie Night”. Once a week, we’d get together with popcorn and soda pop, generally later in the evening and watch something fun. We’d trade off picks. Scott started off showing Sam Peckinpah films. I began with </em>Don’t Go In The Woods<em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">. He loved it. Over the next year-and-a-half of movie nights, we probably watched that one six times. Generally, whenever there were a bunch of people coming over. </em>Don’t Go In The Woods<em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"> became the “crowd special”. It was amazing. We could always get a crowd of folks enthralled by the insanity going on on-screen. It was great. I saw Scott a month ago at a showing of </em>Don’t Go Near The Park<em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">. He’s doing well. Maybe we’ll have another movie night again. Who knows? I was excited to hear that for his last birthday he assembled all his friends together and watched </em>Don’t Go In The Woods<em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">. That’s a good time!</em></div>
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In my experience, the tricky thing with audiences and “so bad they’re good movies” is that once people are put into the mindset to watch this sort of film they have no further ability to discern between “So bad it’s good” and anything else. When they’ve come to laugh at a film, they will laugh and insult, regardless of what is showing on the screen. In fact, this happens whenever I see any sort of strange film in a theater. I don’t know if it’s the <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Mystery Science Theater 3000</em> mindset or what but it can be a little annoying. People hear that <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Headless Eyes</em> (for example) is a “bad movie” and so, instantly, people start yelling things. Automatically, there is nothing about the film that is not ridiculous. When the film does something odd, the response is “What the hell is this?” and a laugh. If this were a David Lynch film, people would sit and try to figure it out. With <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Headless Eyes</em>, “It’s a bad movie so it’s incompetent. It’s nothing but a laugh.” Of course, that kind of attitude is pure balls.</div>
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(On rare occasions, I’ve seen a crowd that’s started yelling shut up by what they were seeing. <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Blackenstein</em> started with people yelling and ended with silence. Maybe everyone fell asleep but, when the lights went up, they looked awake. Awake and confused.)</div>
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<em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Don’t Go In The Woods</em> is one of these films where most people laugh and laugh and laugh. Even during the brutal killings, the laughs flow. (Although, when the man in the sleeping bag gets his throat slit by the hunting knife, people tend to Can It.) During the quite creepy scene where Joanie is hanging from the sleeping bag and sees the killer approaching, people laugh because she starts tearing up the bag to see what’s going on and then to get out. “God! How’s she going to sleep in that?” “Ha! She’s stuck up there!” It’s a creepy scene. I can understand the momentum of a crowd but pull it out a bit and have a peek around. There are some creepy and strange things happening here.</div>
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The opening scene where the young woman runs and runs is very disconcerting. Who is she? Was she jogging through the woods? Who is chasing her? Does she die? We never see or hear from her again. Your response depends on you. If your agenda is set when you arrive, all those questions make the scene laughable. If you approach the film open-minded, well, it still might be laughable. But, it might not. It was the oddness of the opening killings that hooked me on the film. The lack of extensive characterization for our main characters intrigued me. Their first scene is a dialogue-free shot of them walking. They could be another group who gets killed instantly. They’re not but who knows at this point in the narrative.</div>
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<em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">I used to have the first thirty seconds of Dale and his mother on an answering machine. (You know, the guy with the camera and his Mom with the big hat. They appear about ten minutes into the film.) “Dale! Dale! Wait for me!” “I just want to get a shot of the train pulling in!” Followed by the bwop-bwop-bwop comedy music. I didn’t say a word. You just heard the train whistle, these strange people talk, the music and then a beep. I got the best responses from friends and family.</em></div>
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Do you need to ask why Dale brings his mom up there? I always thought that there must be a spot to pull off the road nearby and Dale just wandered a little too far. Who knows? A film that leaves mystery behind, intentional or not, is always watchable.</div>
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(Speaking of leaving mystery behind, here’s a little extra something that doesn’t quite fit in anywhere else. A friend from college who loved the movie told me that on two separate occasions, he had been showing this movie to female friends and it ended up in massive make-out sessions. Whether the women were just trying to get away from the movie or whether the movie has some sort of aphrodisiac effect, I couldn’t say. True story, with love from me to you.)</div>
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I love the Fat Sheriff. “When’d and how’d it happen, Maggie?” I love the significant looks that Dr. Maggie and the Deputy give each other in the hospital cafeteria. (I never noticed it until a woman at one of our viewings said, “Do those two have something going on?”) I love Cherry and Dick with all my heart. Whenever I see the Farrah Fawcett poster, I think, “Did Dick just hang that recently or has that been there for a thousand years?” Who can resist yelling, ”Come out of there, you jerk you!” along with Dick? Who can resist hoping that Cherry will be able to close the van doors the first time she tries? And, who doesn’t cheer when, with the help of editing, she slams that doors shut the second time? Cherry, you are one in a million. No, make that one in a bazillion. Even the lower impact scenes have a thousand and one delights in them. There’s that wonderful scene in the police station with all those random characters coming in and out of frame. “Ooooh, look at that guy!” “Who is she talking to?” You could break this film down moment-by-moment and find something in every nook and cranny.</div>
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I love the half-hearted feel to the police investigation until Peter and Ingrid show up. The Law chats with some people; the Sheriff goes up in a small plane—that’s about it, really. I’m not sure how many Missing Person reports Our Large Sheriff has received but it doesn’t seem to be many. In the scene with the roller skating gal, The Sheriff’s actually out in the woods. He wanders into the killer’s territory early on but nothing happens. So, he wanders out. The sense of space here is odd but adds to the strangeness of the film. The Sheriff and the posse stroll in and out. Craig knows the woods; the others don’t. That’s why he’s killed first. The others get instantly lost. Clearly, the killer knows every inch of the woods. The oddest thing here, if you’re trying to figure out the layout of the area, is the fact that the Sheriff seems to know that someone lives at the old cabin in the woods. As I’ve said elsewhere, if the Sheriff knew that the madman lived there, he should have sent the madman a package. When the nut came out to sign for it, they could have jumped him.</div>
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<em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">I was watching </em>Don’t Go In The Woods<em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"> the other day. It was the first time I’d watched it in about a year. Even films and albums you love can wear themselves out through over-familiarity, so I had stayed away from it. DVD rumors had been flying around for almost a year so I’d been keeping cool and watching other things. But, on this day, I got comfortable on the couch, threw the movie in and hit Play. It was still there. All of it. Every moment of it. Astounding. It was doubly great because, I’d forgotten this, with every viewing I see something or hear something that I didn’t notice before. This time? It’s in the shot that’s on the back of the video box. Cocky Peter is walking past the other three, who have stopped hiking, saying “ Come on you guys! We’re losing the light!” When Peter passes Craig, Craig looks up and gives him a great “Getouttahere!” hand gesture. After I saw that, I began to drift into a half sleep. I was very comfortable. Suddenly, my eyes popped wide open and I realized something —</em></div>
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You can laugh at a film as much as you want. But, some films aren’t made for everyone. Some because they’re esoteric or deliberately paced or foreign. Others because they don’t match up with anything else we’ve seen. If your template for movies is whatever the big sequel is coming out this summer, well, I can’t help you. This isn’t for you. Sure, you can laugh at it. It’s funny. But, if you’ve only come to laugh, hit the road. Maybe my Grandma will go see a Tim Allen movie with you. (You can go to bingo afterwards. Maybe she’ll make you a perogi) <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Don’t Go In the Woods</em> is a very strange film and (here’s what I realized this time around) it could just very well be The Most Perfect Movie ever made.</div>
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How does that bit of hyperbole strike you, hot pants?</div>
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It’s obviously a complete load. But, I’ve seen the film twenty times. I think <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Star Wars</em> is the only other film I’ve seen that often and, I’m sick to death of <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Star Wars</em>. Why do I go back to James Bryan’s oddball exercise? Could it be the way he makes films? Possibly. I’ve seen <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Hellriders</em>, with Tina Louise and Adam West, and it has some of the same feel but not a lot. <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">The Executioner Part 2</em>, however, is clearly made by the same man. “He still has a lot to learn” doesn’t apply if you get it done without learning it.</div>
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People love <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Don’t Go In The Woods</em>. Much of it is scorn but not all. It’s not a <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Plan 9 from Outer Space</em> for a new generation because, unlike <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Plan 9</em>, it gets some things right: brutal killings, a creepy killer, tremendous locations and a sense of isolation that really works. The music is unique and it has a killer theme song. Could it be that indefinable something that certain films have? Well…</div>
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I could, almost literally, go on forever about this film. So, I’ve decided to wind it down and wrap it up by mentioning two more kick-ass elements in the film.</div>
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1) I love comic relief that doesn’t seem like comic relief until you’ve watched it quite a few times. I’m not talking about obvious bad jokes. I’m talking about whole scenes passing without anything that looks like a joke. When you go back to it later, you suddenly realize that that was meant to be comedy. Winterbeast is my favorite example of this. The film is chocked full of comedy but it is so distractingly (wonderfully) cheap and so (beautifully) incompetent that it just looks odd. It looks like bad actors delivering rotten lines. But, it is meant to be loaded with gags. <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Don’t Go In The Woods</em> has that with our policeman and, to a lesser extent, the wheelchair guy. But, you have to know how to shoot comedy. If you have Laurel and Hardy in your film, you can turn the camera on and let them go. The Sheriff & The Deputy are not the same caliber of comedy duo. The disconnected dubbing makes wry comments even stranger. The scene in the general store is loaded with comedy gags about ornithologists and sight gags involving pinball machines. But, it just feels strange. After a few viewings, the pure comedy leaks onto your shoe. You don’t laugh. My response was “Ahh! That explains it!” The plane scene is another example. The scene has a lot of wry little lines but one can get easily distracted by two things: 1) wondering how the Sheriff got into the tiny plane & 2) giggling at how funny the reaction shots of the pilot are. All we see is the back of his head and hear his disembodied voice. Horror can come quite easily to films like this. Comedy is a little tougher. You can see the talent strain. If it wasn’t post-dubbed, you’d probably be able to hear them too.</div>
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2) Do I need to mention how weird H. Kingsley Thurber’s music is? Strange noises, industrial sounds, comedy bwops, acoustic guitar strumming. It’s all here and it is all mad. Was H. Kingsley some sort of eccentric and crazed musical genius? Who knows? His other score, for <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Frozen Scream</em>, uses some of the same music but has a few new themes. Although that movie is incredibly bonkers, the music isn’t as good. In <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Don’t Go In The Woods</em>, every few minutes there seems to be some new sort of music playing. It is either incredibly egregious or oddly appropriate. I think most of the time it works. When it doesn’t, well, it certainly grabs your attention. And, of course, there is the theme song. If you weren’t convinced that this movie was made by aliens or people whose life experience would have made Kaspar Hauser look cosmopolitan, the theme song should convince you. You’ll never be able to hear The Teddy Bear’s Picnic again. The movie ends with a scene of brutality followed by goofy cop behavior. Then, the theme song kicks in. It is goofier than almost any horror film theme song you can think of. More so than the <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Faces of Death</em> song during the credits of <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Faces of Death IV</em> or the <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Psychos in Love</em> theme and that one was meant to be goofy. Sometimes all the elements just come together. The song is the perfect length too. It is short and sweet and ends when the credits do. The film is a total package from the “Spectacular Entertainment” logo at the start until the song ends and the credits fade. On the video, we even got a shot of the Vestron video logo to wrap the whole thing up.</div>
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It doesn’t get better.</div>
Daniel B?http://www.blogger.com/profile/15523815647063071939noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5016594272815403008.post-9989484707934971012021-06-04T11:24:00.000-07:002021-06-04T11:24:22.786-07:00RANA THE LEGEND OF SHADOW LAKE<div style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; background-color: transparent; border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; color: black; font-family: &quot; font-size: 13px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; line-height: 19.5px; margin-bottom: 13px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; orphans: 2; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; text-align: left; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
Directed by Bill Rebane<br style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19.5px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: transparent; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;" />
Brentwood DVD</div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">THE FILM</strong><br style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19.5px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: transparent; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;" />
It was back in 1982. My cousin, Kris, and I sat down with a tape recorder and a 60-minute tape…and the dream of comedy. We grabbed one of those Power Records book and record read-a-long deals for “Winnie The Pooh And The Blustery Day”. We turned on the recorder and started reading and goofing. “Winnie the Pooh-Pooh and the Blustered-Up Day!” We goofed like this for five minutes and turned the recorder off. When we listened to it, we realized that this was the funniest five minutes of anything ever recorded in the world.</div>
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So, we grabbed a couple more books and records and goofed it up! I remember there was a Disney’s Robin Hood and Brer Rabbit and the Tar Baby. In the end, we had about fifteen minutes of brilliance. Then, my cousin had to go home. I kept the tape and listened again and again. The next time she came over, we would do some more.</div>
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After several months of recording little bits here and there, we had all but the final 15 minutes of the tape filled up. Kris was no longer interested in “D & K Makes Fun of Books” (that was the title we thought up). I wanted that 60 minutes loaded. So, we grabbed a fat little book with an illustration on every other page. It was a Hulk story — “Lost In Time”. We started reading and goofed until the tape ended. Finally…</div>
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Kris would do no more. But, I didn’t care. We had 60 minutes of brilliance. Pure comedy genius.</div>
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Several months later, I started listening to it very intently and decided that certain jokes could be better. So, I started inserting new jokes over the old jokes. So, on average, once every two minutes, everything would pause and jump and I would say something “funny” and then we would return to the regular show. In the end, this wasn’t always the best idea.</div>
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So, what did I have?</div>
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A 60 minute tape filled with about 8 different parodies of books we had lying around that were recorded over about three months and overdubbed with new jokes later. I hadn’t thought about “D & K Makes Fun of Books” for years. For some reason, <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Rana: The Legend Of Shadow Lake</em> brought it all flooding back.</div>
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At a very pretty lake in Wisconsin, a man tells a woman the story of his father, himself and some other folks who fought the legendary Rana! (Monster of the lake!) years ago. Most of the movie is a flashback to several groups of people trying to avoid one another and the strange half-frog/half-man monster guarding the treasure that is buried somewhere in the lake. There is the father (a forest ranger), his son, the paleontologist lady who is up to something and her niece. There is a group of “loggers” who never do anything but goof around and bug everyone else. There is an old coot with a strange series of facial expression who knows all about the legends. There is another paleontologist named Sorenson who dies pretty quick. One by one, the monster picks everyone off. In the last six or seven minutes, the flashback ends and the man and woman go looking for the treasure themselves.</div>
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In some of Bill Rebane’s films, the fact that nothing is happening becomes a virtue (<em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><a href="http://bleedingskull.com/?p=1330" style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; color: black; font-size: 13px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; text-decoration: underline;" title="Invasion From Inner Earth (1974)">Invasion From Inner Earth</a></em>). In <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Rana</em>, not so much. Folks chatter and then wander around. Someone gets attacked. Folks wander around some more. The viewer starts to guess which group we might cut to next. Most of the time you won’t be wrong. By an hour in, I discovered that, even thought the plot is very basic, I had lost all the connections that the characters had with one another. I’d forgotten why anyone was doing anything and just watched.</div>
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I enjoy Bill Rebane films. But, this one drives me a little goofy. There’s no narrative drive and it feels like the framing stuff is from the 80s and the rest is from the late 70s. I have no idea if this is true but that’s what it feels like. And, do you know what part of the framing scenes made me think it was the 80s? The woman’s bathrobe. She wears a big, blue bathrobe showing off her legs and, for some reason, I thought “This is the 80s!” I don’t quite know why.</div>
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Bill certainly knows how to put people in front of the camera. But, there just aren’t enough bits in this film that stand out to make it anything more than an evening’s viewing for a Rebaneist (a Bill Rebane completist). Regardless, I will say that one moment in the film made me laugh out loud at the “100% Pure Rebane-ness” of it all.</div>
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The man is randomly narrating the story. When it starts, he is seen facing the woman. They were sitting in chairs in front of the fireplace. The story is told. We see the events occurring. The man’s voice crops up every once in a while. Then, we return to the cabin…and the man and the woman are on the floor making out.</div>
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There’s no jump in the story. It just fades from the story to the making out. “Seduction Through Deliberately Paced Flashback!” Just the thought that, as the man told the story, he slowly moved her onto the floor and continued saying things like “The old trapper had a face twisted from a hunting accident long ago” as he was kissing her and trying to reach under her bathrobe makes me laugh. And, it’s pure Rebane. You throw in a touch of titillation whenever you can even if it doesn’t make much sense. This is why I love the films of Bill Rebane.</div>
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If Mr. Rebane made 60-minute films, his oeuvre would be one of the best. Unfortunately, each film has to hit 90 minutes. And, you can tell there’s some struggling going on. Folks run around in circles and stretch and stretch the time. Sometimes this works for his films. For <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Rana</em>, it doesn’t quite. Which is too bad because the woods and the lake are awesome.</div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">AUDIO AND VIDEO</strong><br style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19.5px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: transparent; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;" />
I saw it as part of the “Toxie’s Triple Terror Volume 3”, where it appears as <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Croaked: Frog Monster from Hell</em>. It looks and sounds like a decent VHS circa 1984. The occasional line of dialogue here and there is a bit muffled but you’ll never miss much.</div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">EXTRAS</strong><br style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19.5px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: transparent; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;" />
Well, the Toxie set does have two other movies. They’re worth watching once-or-twice. <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Video Demons Do Psychotown</em> and the utterly wonderful <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">The Hungan</em>. Watch the latter again and again.</div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">FINAL THOUGHTS</strong><br style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19.5px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: transparent; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;" />
I had a hell of a time engaging with <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Rana</em>, although I’ve watched it twice now. If you need to see all of Bill Rebane’s films or anything about monsters in the water, watch it. If not, give me a call. You can help me look for my “D & K Makes Fun of Books” tape. It’s around here somewhere.</div>
08/30/07Daniel B?http://www.blogger.com/profile/15523815647063071939noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5016594272815403008.post-27364776557834730672021-03-10T18:21:00.002-08:002021-03-10T18:21:31.814-08:00LADY STREET FIGHTER<div style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; background-color: transparent; border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; color: black; font-family: &quot; font-size: 13px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; line-height: 19.5px; margin-bottom: 13px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; orphans: 2; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; text-align: left; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
Directed by James Bryan<br style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19.5px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: transparent; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;" />
Unicorn Video, Inc. VHS</div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">THE FILM</strong><br style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19.5px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: transparent; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;" />
Renee Harmon’s character’s sister has been killed. It has something to do with a “master tape” that the FBI and Assassins Inc. are after. Renee shows up in Los Angeles to find out what happened. She becomes involved in a web of kung-fu fighting/car chasing intrigue that leads her right to the top. I think. A man named Rick Pollard romances her but is he working for the FBI or the assassins or both? And, who is Mr. Diamond, the wealthy man who throws strange sex parties in his opulent mansion? And, who is that man who looks exactly like Dick from <a href="http://bleedingskull.com/dont-go-in-the-woods-remembering-cherry-dick-and-all-their-friends/" style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; color: black; font-size: 13px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; text-decoration: underline;" title="Don’t Go In The Woods: Remembering Cherry, Dick, And All Their Friends"><em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Don’t Go In The Woods</em></a>, constantly lurking around in the background? And, why do I keep hearing the stock music from <a href="http://bleedingskull.com/invasion-from-inner-earth-1974/" style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; color: black; font-size: 13px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; text-decoration: underline;" title="Invasion From Inner Earth (1974)"><em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Invasion From Inner Earth</em></a>?</div>
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James Bryan and Renee Harmon team up for the first of three movies. This one is the best. Mr. Bryan’s wonderful way of relating information is running on high. Renee looks good and kicks a considerable amount of ass. I think <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Don’t Go In The Woods</em> and <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Frozen Scream</em> are higher accomplishments for them separately. Together, however, this is their <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Duck Soup</em>.</div>
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We start off with a rather disturbing torture scene made even odder by the strange-strange off key pop tune that plays near the end. Then, Renee shows up in a series of great outfits. She has a pretty cool stunt in a parking garage. She performs acts of kung-fu on assorted gentlemen. She takes a shower. (I’m not sure how I feel about seeing Renee nude.) She fellates a stalk of celery for what feels like hours on end. She falls in love with Mr. Pollard (and he with her). If you’re wondering why Ms. Harmon is cool, this is the movie to watch.</div>
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Mr. Bryan kept me on my toes throughout. Locations change. People appear and then vanish for long stretches only to reappear leaving my mind thinking “Who is that?” During the sex party, we keep cutting to a group of guys in bed sheets with drinks yelling “Toga! Toga!” The sound and the pictures don’t always match up right, which makes for gloriously disorientating viewing. (It’s the strangest during long scenes when Renee is kicking ass or lounging around and not speaking. When she suddenly does speak, her voice is always really loud and her accent more pronounced then ever. I fell off my love seat on more than one occasion.) Mr. B handles the action scenes with gusto. They are the most straightforwardly entertaining scenes here. It’s only in the plot where things go a little wonky because, although it is pretty simple, it gets doled out in strange portions. Well, it certainly kept me guessing, took me two viewings to piece it all together.</div>
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The film bobs and weaves and leaps around and punches you and shrieks at you and buzzes in your head and takes its top off and then, with a magic trick and the promise of a sequel, it’s gone. 72 minutes is the perfect length.</div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">AUDIO AND VIDEO</strong><br style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19.5px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: transparent; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;" />
Old, old tape. The whole movie had a yellow tinge to it but I think that was the print. The audio leaps all over the place. You know, <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Don’t Go In The Woods</em> wasn’t compromised in its Special Edition. I’d like to see a spiffed-up version of this (and <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Executioner Part 2</em>) on DVD. It’s too bad Renee won’t be able to join us for the special features.</div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">EXTRAS</strong><br style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19.5px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: transparent; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;" />
Only in dreams, my sweet friend.</div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">FINAL THOUGHTS</strong><br style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19.5px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: transparent; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;" />
The film is like a woman screaming in your ear while she feeds you chocolate covered strawberries and, occasionally, kicks you in the balls. It’s that good!</div>
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Oh…</div>
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The one film I kept thinking of when I was watching this was <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Double Agent 73</em>. Yes, there are no Chesty-sized boobs with cameras in them. But, they’re both about women kicking ass and falling for double agents and stripping out of awesome outfits during their spare moments. Try a double feature. I will this weekend. I think it’ll be great.</div>
03/27/08Daniel B?http://www.blogger.com/profile/15523815647063071939noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5016594272815403008.post-60067057341877360212021-03-10T18:21:00.001-08:002021-03-10T18:21:09.759-08:00FINAL EXAM AppreciationAugust 1, 2008<br />
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Jimmy Huston Away! The shuttle has released its payload! And, it’s 100% Pure Huston…laced with plenty of “Oh Yeah”!</div>
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I love <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px;">Final Exam</em>. And, yes, I appreciate it. It’s a film I’ve always enjoyed but would never defend. I didn’t think you could. As a slasher, it disappoints most people. There are only two killings in the first half and those are in the first five minutes. There is very little suspense and no scares until the killing begins, over fifty-five minutes in. There is a presence there. The killer is always lurking around and, clearly, sizing up the group of college students he’s planning on killing when night falls.</div>
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The movie takes place on the penultimate day of Finals Week at Lanier College in North Carolina. The first hour is, basically, about a group of college students who all have some sort of final exam on the last day of Finals. We follow them from a chemistry exam in the mid-afternoon until the middle of the night when the killer is finally killed himself<sup style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; font-size: 10.86px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px;"><a href="http://bleedingskull.com/nobody-cares-about-grades-an-appreciation-of-final-exam/#fn1" id="ref1" style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; color: black; font-size: 9.06px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: underline;">1</a></sup>. The last half-hour is the people we have been watching getting murdered by this unnamed man in quick succession.</div>
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I can understand the slasher fan’s disappointment. Even I used to think that the film loses it a bit when the killing starts (actually the opposite of what the slasher fan would be thinking). I really enjoyed the strange audacity of spending almost an hour setting up all the characters without introducing any extraneous characters just to kill (Hello, <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px;">Friday the 13th</em>!)<sup style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; font-size: 10.86px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px;"><a href="http://bleedingskull.com/nobody-cares-about-grades-an-appreciation-of-final-exam/#fn2" id="ref2" style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; color: black; font-size: 9.06px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: underline;">2</a></sup>. When the killing started, I always felt a little sad. I enjoyed the characters — even the rather annoying “Wildman” had his charms. But, I used to float away during the killings. There’s not much in them to distinguish them from other slashers of the period and the final chase is a little dull.</div>
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In March 2008, I saw <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px;">Final Exam</em> on the big screen and that made all the difference.</div>
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think I forgot how important the all-encompassing atmosphere of a theater can work for a film. I think that even when you’re watching a film at home in the most optimum atmosphere — You’ve got a big screen. You’ve got loud speakers. The room is dimmed. There is nothing to distract you, in theory. There can be so many ways to have your attention yanked away. The phone can ring. Someone can interrupt you. If you have to go to the bathroom, you’ll pause the film and go. (In a theater, you might choose to hold it in and not miss anything.) And, in the end, there is a different sort of feeling when you’re watching something at any time you want between watching something with a set time to it. The movie theater makes it more of an event, possibly stamps it with more importance. It sure worked with <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px;">Final Exam</em>.</div>
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First, the print I saw was lighter than the VHS tape. In the opening sequence, the space behind the couple making out is nothing but darkness and the occasional headlight. On the big screen, it’s clear that they’re not very far away from the campus. Those lights are cars passing a campus building. I had always thought that they were quite some distance away. Maybe up on a hill or something. Skipping to the end: During the final chase, Courtney runs down a little alley in between two buildings. There’s a sign there. It reads “Bookstore”. I’d never spotted it before.</div>
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There are moments of framing that come out on the big screen (and also in a widescreen version), where things that can’t be seen on the VHS or that are on the very edges of the frame take on more significance. The one that really grabbed me was when Gary is stealing a test from a professor’s darkened office and we see the killer, with knife, in the window of the office door. I was pretty sure I’d seen him there before but couldn‘t quite remember. Regardless, it had never had an impact before. The killer has been lurking for so long and now he seems to be ready to kill. But, he doesn’t. In fact, doing that doesn’t match his MO at all. If he’s been watching everyone as intently as I think he has, he must know that the frat guys are nearby. A killing now would mess up everything he’s been planning. And, there’s a possibility that he knows Gary gave his pledge pin to Janet. If so, his brothers will probably tree him<sup style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; font-size: 10.86px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px;"><a href="http://bleedingskull.com/nobody-cares-about-grades-an-appreciation-of-final-exam/#fn3" id="ref3" style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; color: black; font-size: 9.06px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: underline;">3</a></sup>. That would be the perfect time to kill Gary. Not here. Plus, it’s still daylight.</div>
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So, why is this moment here? It could be a mistake. Mr. Huston may have gone against his restraint in the rest of the film and decided to add an actual threat here. If so, that’s too bad but you’ll find some sloppy writing in this article and that’s too bad too. None of us are perfect. You give credit to someone for trying, especially when they succeed most of the time. There is always the possibility that the Killer means to kill Gary and then maybe go after Janet and leave it at that. He only killed two folks at the last college. Maybe that was his plan. They are the only couple in the main body of the film.</div>
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Could it be that when he hears the frat boys approaching he hides and sees Gary get treed? At that point, he may realize that, with a little patience and keeping a keen eye open, he can kill many more people than he originally planned<sup style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; font-size: 10.86px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px;"><a href="http://bleedingskull.com/nobody-cares-about-grades-an-appreciation-of-final-exam/#fn4" id="ref4" style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; color: black; font-size: 9.06px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: underline;">4</a></sup>. If you watch it, you can see that everyone congregates together and then, as the night progresses, they separate off into smaller groups and then by themselves. As this happens, he kills them. He may have anticipated this but not thought he could pull it off. (Why hang around looking more suspicious then you have to?) Of course, this is all way off my original point about spotting new things on the big screen.</div>
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The framing doesn’t always succeed, by the way. I’ve always loved the bit where Courtney is on the staircase and passes the mirror with the killer in it. She goes into the hall, pauses, steps back in but the killer is gone. It’s a nice Michael Meyers moment. On the big screen, it’s a bit too…big. The killer’s a large man. It seems less plausible that Courtney would have missed him. It seems like he’s standing there because the director thought it would be a cool place for him to stand. Also, the killer’s big, brown van lurks a little too obviously ominously on the big screen.</div>
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he element about the big screen viewing that really surprised me was that the last half-hour works almost perfectly when my attention was 100% on it. Starting with Gary in the office until the first killing, there are about half-a-dozen moments of “Here comes the Killer! No…it’s that guy or gal.” False scares lurk all over films like this. But, they seem to multiply in this film as the time when we expect the killings to begin approaches. By the time Gary is cut free from the tree, I knew from previous viewings that he was dead, but the experience of watching it, as I was, made me doubt what I knew was going to happen. The patience of the killer coupled with the false scares made me sit quietly as Gary walks away from the tree. It’s almost the sort of thing where you see or hear something but don’t register it until a moment later. I knew Gary was going to die but I had been caught up in the false scare rhythm. I knew this was his end. Janet doesn’t have the character to sneak around like this. (When she arrives at the tree, she is yelling “Gary!”) It must be the killer. And yet, we’ve had our strings pulled and maybe…The killer drops on Gary and the murders begin.</div>
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Keeping those thoughts and hopping to Courtney’s Final Run — many slashers lose me when the final chase begins. They are generally not very scary and pretty perfunctory. A lot of running and no killing. Just make it to the end. I used to feel that way about the end of <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px;">Final Exam</em>. I don’t anymore for one simple reason…When Courtney runs out of the kitchen and bolts into the “Bookstore” alley, we see a close-up of the killer’s feet bounding over a dumpster. We see Courtney dashing around a corner. The end is near. And, suddenly, I realized that I was shaking. I was scared and riveted, literally, on the edge of my seat. That had never happened before. When the credits started to roll, I felt a bit drained but rather thrilled. I stood at the bus stop with that sort of shivery feeling that a good film or a good song or a good anything gives you. I’d seen the film fifteen times. This was the first time that happened. I could watch the film at home as many times I wanted but until I saw it right I didn’t get the full power of it.</div>
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Nicely done, Mr. Huston.</div>
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Before I wander into the characters, I must mention one more thing I noticed. What about Courtney and the double doors? Courtney and Lisa’s room has two doors but it’s never really made a big deal out of. That’s just the way the room is laid out. At the end of one scene, late in the movie, Radish leaves through one and asks Courtney to lock it. She does. There is a pause and then a knock on the other door. It’s Radish. He compliments Courtney and leaves. It’s very sweet. Then, during the final chase, Courtney locks the killer into the meat locker in the kitchen. As she walks away, the killer bursts from a second door that Courtney didn’t know was open or didn’t know was part of the same locker. It’s an interesting parallel. Maybe if she had taken Radish’s advice and locked both doors the killer would have been stuck in the meat locker?</div>
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Following on from that, here’s another thought: Radish is in the gym. He discovers dead bodies. Swiftly, he dashes across campus to Courtney’s room. He pounds on her door and the killer yanks him through it and…that is the end of Radish. Courtney has gone to the Coke machine. When she returns, the killer has posed Radish in the door. But, he is not there. He has gone to the conservatory to kill Lisa. It makes me wonder…Was he in Courtney’s room to kill Courtney? She wasn’t there so he waited. But, the person who arrived was Radish so he killed him and went on to the next killing. Making Courtney the Final Girl by default, not design. Maybe Radish was meant to be the Final Girl, as it were. It’s not a groundbreaking revelation or anything, just a thought. Radish is the one who is the most interested in the randomness of the crazy.</div>
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As I mentioned, I always liked the film because it presents a group of young people in their prime. They are named and characterized and presented with lives. Then, this unknown man comes in and kills them all, leaving the one who kills him scarred. It’s a tragic story more than a slasher film. It’s like a driver’s ed film where we meet some sweet kids right before they go out driving and die. It’s inevitable. The killer is a force of nature like a hurricane. It’s coming. And, it’ll be here before the sun comes up<sup style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; font-size: 10.86px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px;"><a href="http://bleedingskull.com/nobody-cares-about-grades-an-appreciation-of-final-exam/#fn5" id="ref5" style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; color: black; font-size: 9.06px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: underline;">5</a></sup>. In my mind, the film worked about 80%. I’d never quite warmed to the last half-hour and some of the characters were kind of blah to me. Janet and Gary and Wildman and Brian were too obvious for me. My focus (as slashers seem to make it) was on Courtney and the people closest to her (Radish and Lisa).</div>
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I can safely say without fear of being accused of hyperbole that <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px;">Final Exam </em>works 90% of the time. “Dan, 90%? Where’d you come up with that? What about the other percent?” Well, I’m using the Crossley-Briggs Movie Meter as invented in 1934 and revised in 1956 and again in 1962. No, I’m just making that up. I don’t like starring reviews or giving them “Thumbs Ups” because there are too many variables in the area of filmmaking that we float around in. A filmmaker with 100 million dollars and full studio support shouldn’t be goofing up. Someone with very little money and limited time can have their work go wrong in so many ways. Let’s celebrate when they go right before we dwell on what went wrong. (Although, for some films, the joy can come from the sheer overwhelming volume of things gone wrong. <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px;">The Last Slumber Party</em>, I’m talking to you! And loving it!) There are a lot of things that go right in <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px;">Final Exam</em>. Here is what I think (with a revised C-BMM rating) still goes wrong:</div>
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Some of the dialogue is awkward. It just happens during the conversations. It’s tough to pin down exact moments but there are a few bits during the opening “meet and greet” tracking shots where there is some blatant exposition and all the walking and talking suddenly seems like acting, rather than natural conversation. It’s nothing that gets in the way of the film but certain moments remind you that this is a film. The acting is uniformly good. Maybe a Master Class group of actors would have brought a little more to the table. The only actor who is distracting is the woman who plays Elizabeth. She delivers her lines a bit shrilly. But, she seemed to be a crowd favorite at the theater so who’s complaining?</div>
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A few of the suspense building moments don’t quite come off on the big screen. The aforementioned staircase moment and the big van<sup style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; font-size: 10.86px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px;"><a href="http://bleedingskull.com/nobody-cares-about-grades-an-appreciation-of-final-exam/#fn6" id="ref6" style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; color: black; font-size: 9.06px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: underline;">6</a></sup>. Sometimes the killer standing around is convincing. Sometimes he’s posing for a <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px;">Halloween</em> remake.</div>
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And…the bit that bugged me: Lisa is in the conservatory. She is on the second or third floor practicing her piano, waiting for the Chemistry Professor. She looks out the window. She hears someone enter the building. So, she heads up one floor and prepares the art room, lighting candles and losing her clothes. Then, we cut to the killer killing Radish from over in Courtney’s room, several buildings away. Then, back to Lisa, nude under a lovely satin sheet. A man enters…it’s the killer. She is murdered.</div>
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Who did she hear entering the building when she was looking out the window? It couldn’t have been the killer because he was several buildings away killing Radish. Or the killer opened the door of the conservatory, ran to the dorm, killed Radish and ran back. But, that strains all slasher credibility. If it was the professor, why didn’t he come up? There’s no sign of him anywhere. Surely, if he was killed, his body would appear somewhere. And, if a beautiful young woman was waiting for you under a satin sheet at the top of three flights of stairs, why would you take five or ten minutes to go up there, especially if you have a wife and kids waiting at home? Lisa doesn’t announce that she’s ready. So, she prepares and a man walks in and it’s the killer. So, my question stands: Who does she hear that makes her go up to prepare? I don’t think it was the killer.</div>
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It was either: 1. The Professor, but he got called away for some reason so he never went up the steps, or 2. Someone else entirely. Maybe they went in the wrong building or in another room. But, Lisa seems pretty sure that it’s the Professor. Surely assignations of this sort don’t have random things like this happen. Either one is a bit too coincidental.</div>
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Piddling stuff, really. Especially, when so much of the film works. The characters are good. You don’t want to see them die. And, when the killing begins, it’s in a rush that is overwhelming. When Radish dies, several people in the theater yelled “No way!” and “Oh no, Radish!” No one made a similar sound when characters died during <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px;">Friday The 13th: The Final Chapter</em>, which showed before <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px;">Final Exam</em>. That’s doing something right. And, as I mentioned, for me, the last half-hour all fell into place this time. I’ve talked about all of that already so I’d like to spend a little more time on the individual characters before I wrap this rambling appreciation up<sup style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; font-size: 10.86px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px;"><a href="http://bleedingskull.com/nobody-cares-about-grades-an-appreciation-of-final-exam/#fn7" id="ref7" style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; color: black; font-size: 9.06px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: underline;">7</a></sup>.</div>
<div style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; background-color: transparent; border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; color: black; font-family: &quot; font-size: 13px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; line-height: 19.5px; margin-bottom: 13px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px 0px 13px; orphans: 2; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: left; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px;">Courtney:</strong> The Final Girl, but only because she makes it to the end. She may dress like a standard Final Girl but I don’t think she is. Radish and she clearly have a little something blooming there. If the Killer hadn’t come along, I predict they would have been together soon after the next semester began. She does spend almost the entire movie studying at her desk but that just makes her studious. And, it is the night before her last final. For all we know, she could be pulling an all-nighter, which doesn’t strike me as Final Girl behavior.</div>
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Courtney is intelligent, attractive and observant. She is modeled, I believe, on Laurie from <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px;">Halloween</em>. But, since this is a dorm, she’s more in the center of things than Laurie was and she gets along fine. She likes her roommate, Lisa, but is jealous of her. She clearly likes Radish but both of them are rather shy. She seems to get on well with everyone. She doesn’t really know what she wants to do with her life, unlike almost everyone else. She is a slightly above-average American gal. Sweet and kind and, if you got her out of those jeans and that sweater and in to something a little more feminine, she’d probably be rather hot.</div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px;">Radish:</strong> He’s nerdy. He has a computer. He wants to be a member of a SWAT team. He is obsessed with serial killers and people who hurt other people. The jocks and frat guys pick on him but it never seems truly threatening. Possibly as college progresses, he would grow away from most of these folks as he got deeper into whatever his work is. But, as I remember from college, all the cliques and groups melded together for the first semester or two. Radish becomes part of it. Oh, he clearly has a thing for Courtney but doesn’t know how to bring it up. He also is equipment manager for the football team. Maybe it’s an extra credit thing.</div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px;">Lisa:</strong> She’s blonde. She’s rather hot. She’s a city girl who knows that she can get almost anything she wants with her wiles and she’s getting it. She is passing Chemistry by sleeping with the teacher. She chastises Courtney for studying too much. “Once you get out of school, nobody cares what your grades were.” This is generally true but not everyone has the sort of disposition where they can just shake their ass at everyone to get what they want. When we first see her, she is setting up her meeting with the Professor. She dies waiting for the Professor to arrive.</div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px;">Brian:</strong> He has great hair and a cool car. He’s pretty much standard preppy. He probably has wealthy parents and is just at college because they want him to be there. As the head of the frat, I would guess he’s several years older than the other main characters, except for Wildman. I don’t quite know why he’d be hanging out with everyone here but he is. It’s a friendly campus, I guess. Brian is a rather calm “feel good” kind of guy. He keeps his head while being chased by the Killer but loses out in the end.</div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px;">Wildman:</strong> The big, loud football guy in the same fraternity with Brian. He yells a lot and likes drinking. Everyone seems to like him, though. No one shakes their head at him with disdain. He dies stealing pain pills from the Coach’s office. He puts up a decent fight against the Killer but most of his fighting style involves yelling. Maybe if it involved some drinking too it would have worked.</div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px;">Janet:</strong> She is the gal who always has a serious boyfriend. She’s a bit empty headed but she loves Gary. In fact, it is her love for Gary that leads to her death. If she hadn’t gone to un-tree him, she might have lived. At one point, she admits that her relationships have gotten more serious since college and she’s not so happy about that. In the end, her love of being loved wins out.</div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px;">Gary:</strong> A fraternity pledge who breaks into a professor’s office to steal exam answers while wearing a shirt that says “GARY” in bright, white letters. He’s that sort of guy. Janet loves him. But, I’m less than convinced that he loves Janet. (There’s a possibility that she puts out nicely in the sex department.) This is confirmed when he says “That bitch is always late!” while he’s “treed”. He clearly cares about his fraternity more than her. (She is one compartment in his life.) He seems to have more fun with the frat boys that with Janet. Of course, both of these things lead to his downfall.</div>
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Those are the main characters in the film. The actors bring extra shades to all of them that my brief overviews don’t really touch on.</div>
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Look, I’ve gone on quite a bit here. <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px;">Final Exam</em> is a good movie. It’s not a classic, nor is it really trying to be. It’s a good horror film with a rather daring structure that is well worth your time. I know most folks won’t be able to see this on the big screen but, if you can, for God’s sake, do. You’ll see the film right. It’s worth it.</div>
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After all of that, I’ve got four quick closing points and then I’ll let you return to your life. (I have to get to work on my Byron Quisenberry’s<em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px;"> Scream</em> — An Appreciation.)</div>
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First Point: I’ve read in assorted reviews over the years that folks have problems with the fact that the killer doesn’t seem to be given a motive. Of course he is. Radish says at one point “Someone wakes up one morning and just decides ‘Today is a good day to snuff somebody’.” The killer is insane. He has no motive apart from the fact that he’s nuts. It’s a lot more like real serial killer behavior than most slashers with their elaborate motives and back stories<sup style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; font-size: 10.86px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px;"><a href="http://bleedingskull.com/nobody-cares-about-grades-an-appreciation-of-final-exam/#fn8" id="ref8" style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; color: black; font-size: 9.06px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: underline;">8</a></sup>.</div>
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Second Point: Watch <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px;">House Of Death</em> after this and spot the same cast members appearing. Everyone thought “Gene Poole” was a gag. It may be but the guy exists. I’ve seen him in two movies.</div>
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<div style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; background-color: transparent; border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; color: black; font-family: &quot; font-size: 13px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; line-height: 19.5px; margin-bottom: 13px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px 0px 13px; orphans: 2; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: left; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">Third Point: I believe that the film takes place at the end of the Winter Semester. It’s never started as fact and no one has any Christmas decorations up. But…if tomorrow were the last day, Lisa would have packed everything and not just a couple of suitcases. At least one of the dorm rooms we see would have everything packed up, ready to leave in the morning. But, there’s nothing. And, the convincer…”You look like you’re never coming back.” “It all depends on our grades.” Lisa and Courtney see two of their friends taking everything home. Going away for the summer, you take everything and you don’t say “Why are you taking everything?” to people. Going home for the winter, you take what you need for the break because you’ll be right back.</div>
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Fourth Point: Is Mitch, the night watchman, dead? Courtney pounds on his truck to wake him up but he doesn’t move. I was never sure if he was dead or asleep or passed out drunk. I thought on the big screen I’d see a slit throat or something. But, you know, I didn’t. I continue to wonder about Mitch.</div>
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<sup id="fn1" style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; font-size: 10.86px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px;">1. The time frame does seem a little off. The final chase seems like it should conclude around midnight. But, certain things seem to indicate that it is almost morning. The main one being the Coach arriving to pick up the security guard for hunting. I know hunters start early but do they start at midnight. Isn’t it more like an hour or two before sunrise? Something about the final shot seems to indicate that the sun is about to rise, too. But, this doesn’t really hold water. Courtney is studying for her finals. However, a woman as smart and studious as her wouldn’t be studying until right before dawn. She’d get some sleep. And, Lisa is killed in the conservatory waiting for the chemistry professor. When Courtney gets there, the killer is still there. I can’t imagine the married professor agreed to meet Lisa at 4 or 5 in the morning.<a href="http://bleedingskull.com/nobody-cares-about-grades-an-appreciation-of-final-exam/#ref1" style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; color: black; font-size: 9.06px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: underline;" title="Jump back to footnote 1 in the text.">↩</a></sup></div>
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<sup id="fn1" style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; font-size: 10.86px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px;">2. One of the strangest things I used to see in reviews for this film is when books that hate slashers complain that this one has too much talk. There was a book from Cinebooks in 1988 called “The Horror Film” that has some great reviews alongside some of the most hilariously condescending reviews you’ve ever seen. <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; font-size: 9.06px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px;">Final Exam</em> gets a zero rating. (Not an uncommon occurrence in this book.) They hate slasher films but they complain that the film is all “talk, talk, talk”. Then, they complain that there isn’t enough blood in the killings. I never quite figured out what this book was up too. If you don’t like any horror films post-<em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; font-size: 9.06px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px;">Night Of The Living Dead</em>, don’t review them.<a href="http://bleedingskull.com/nobody-cares-about-grades-an-appreciation-of-final-exam/#ref2" style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; color: black; font-size: 9.06px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: underline;" title="Jump back to footnote 2 in the text.">↩</a></sup></div>
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<sup id="fn1" style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; font-size: 10.86px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px;">3. To “tree” someone: Every pledge is given a pledge pin. It’s a tradition to give your girlfriend your pledge pin to wear. However, if your frat brothers catch you without your pledge pin, you will get “treed”. They strip you down to your underpants, tie you to a tree in the middle of the campus, cover you with shaving cream and spray you with fire extinguisher foam. The only person who can cut you down is the gal with the pledge pin. Does anyone study anymore?<a href="http://bleedingskull.com/nobody-cares-about-grades-an-appreciation-of-final-exam/#ref3" style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; color: black; font-size: 9.06px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: underline;" title="Jump back to footnote 3 in the text.">↩</a></sup></div>
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<sup id="fn1" style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; font-size: 10.86px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px;">4. In the end, this is a bad idea. Courtney kills him. It may have worked better if he’d killed Gary and Janet and left.<a href="http://bleedingskull.com/nobody-cares-about-grades-an-appreciation-of-final-exam/#ref4" style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; color: black; font-size: 9.06px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: underline;" title="Jump back to footnote 4 in the text.">↩</a></sup></div>
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<sup id="fn1" style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; font-size: 10.86px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px;">5. In that way, it is very different from the other slashers of its time. We care about, maybe, the Final Girl, in those. Everyone else is expendable and, frankly, that’s why we love them. The best slashers are guilt-free carnage. We don’t have to get involved. We just watch.<a href="http://bleedingskull.com/nobody-cares-about-grades-an-appreciation-of-final-exam/#ref5" style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; color: black; font-size: 9.06px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: underline;" title="Jump back to footnote 5 in the text.">↩</a></sup></div>
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<sup id="fn1" style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; font-size: 10.86px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px;">6. I know the frat boys pull their prank with a big brown van but still…<a href="http://bleedingskull.com/nobody-cares-about-grades-an-appreciation-of-final-exam/#ref6" style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; color: black; font-size: 9.06px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: underline;" title="Jump back to footnote 6 in the text.">↩</a></sup></div>
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<sup id="fn1" style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; font-size: 10.86px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px;">7. I tried to give this thing more structure but sometimes you just want to talk about something you like. And, like chatting with a friend, you go on tangents and float onto side roads and go all over the place. My apologies to anyone looking for a more concisely structured article.<a href="http://bleedingskull.com/nobody-cares-about-grades-an-appreciation-of-final-exam/#ref7" style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; color: black; font-size: 9.06px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: underline;" title="Jump back to footnote 7 in the text.">↩</a></sup></div>
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<sup id="fn1" style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; font-size: 10.86px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px;">8. There’s always time for one more footnote. I recently listened to an episode of Dragnet: “Big Cast” (airdate 02/08/51). (“The story you have just heard is true…”) In that one, a dozen men have gone missing over the period of a few months. Friday and Romero track down the killer. And, this killer likes to talk. He says, “…one thing I get a big kick out of is detective magazines, mystery stories. The way they make out the murderers…They always build it up into something big. Somebody’s always killing someone for a million dollars or maybe over some woman, some beautiful woman. Same way with the movies. That’s where they get it all mixed up…Every time some guy writes a murder story he’s got to build up some big reason for the killing. Lot of money, beautiful woman, revenge, maybe. Always gotta be a big reason, motive. ‘Motive’, that’s what they say…I’ll bet you there’s a thousand murder cases in your files without any reason at all. Some people just kill, that’s all. I’ve heard about lots of ‘em. They just want to kill and they go ahead and do it…Like this thing you’ve been talking about, 10, 12 guys disappear. They got a few bucks, maybe they got nothing. Somebody plows ‘em under and that’s all. No big reason. They just do it. So, 12 guys are gone. That doesn’t mean anything.” If it was good enough for an award-winning radio show that many consider to be a classic (count me as one of them), why can’t it work for Jimmy Huston and “Final Exam”?<a href="http://bleedingskull.com/nobody-cares-about-grades-an-appreciation-of-final-exam/#ref8" style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: none; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: 0px; color: black; font-size: 9.06px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: underline;" title="Jump back to footnote 8 in the text.">↩</a></sup></div>
<b></b><i></i><u></u><sub></sub><sup></sup><strike></strike><br />Daniel B?http://www.blogger.com/profile/15523815647063071939noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5016594272815403008.post-46186972352871393472020-06-18T11:57:00.000-07:002020-06-18T11:57:15.399-07:00SLASHED DREAMS<div style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; background-color: transparent; border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; color: black; font-family: &quot; font-size: 13px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; line-height: 19.5px; margin-bottom: 13px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; orphans: 2; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; text-align: left; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
Directed by James Polakof<br />
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">THE FILM</strong><br />
The first time I really felt ripped off when renting movies was in high school and it was this movie that ripped me. Eric Zydel and I rented it for two reasons: 1) Robert Englund is in it and 2) it looks like a slasher. It was not one we had heard of and the art on the box (along with the blurb on back) seemed wrong somehow. But, we rented it and we watched it. Then, halfway through, we ended up taking it off. <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Slashed Dreams</em> became shorthand for “this movie is not what it seems…and it sucks”.</div>
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In 2007, the deception continues. The movie is still not a slasher film, nor is it a horror film. To include it anywhere near the Horror shelves is going to guarantee people getting mad at it, laughing at it and falling asleep during it. Nothing really big happens (plot-wise) until halfway into the movie and then nothing much happens after that. If you were a heady renter and you found this one, you can imagine the steam flying out of you ears as each minute passed and you found you’ve been lied to. To the folks who know (maybe just Eric and me), this is one of the most disreputable films in the Horror canon.</div>
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The problem is that it is just not a horror film. Not by a longshot. Not even a little. <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Mame</em> is more of a horror film than <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Slashed Dreams</em> or, apparently, <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Sunburst</em>. So, after acknowledging the disappointment, is the film worth watching in whatever genre it actually is a part of?</div>
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The film is about a couple leaving their big city college campus and going to the wilderness to find a friend who dropped out. The woman, Jenny, dumps her boyfriend before leaving as he thinks their drop-out friend was just a lazy hippy who didn’t want any responsibility. Luckily, she hooks up with the guy, Robert, and heads out into the woods. Everything seems wonderful at first. They find a cabin that they stay in. They discover the beauty of nature and that they like skinny dipping with each other.</div>
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Then, two rednecks show up. At first they just heckle the couple. Then, they beat Robert and rape Jenny. The couple’s friend, Michael (Robert Englund), shows up and tries to help them. Robert has a muddy fight with the two rednecks who run away. Jenny reads a poem about the sun and pain, which begins to help her through her grief.</div>
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Does anything in there sound horror-like? The two rednecks are in the film for less than ten minutes. The majority of the film is about two city folks learning that the “virgin’ wilderness has its problems, too. When they finally meet Michael, he proves tremendously unhelpful. In fact, he spends a lot of his time talking about tea. He is given a long scene where he talks to Jenny and tries to convince her to carry on. But, it’s never really convincing. In fact, Jenny doesn’t seem ready to move on until she reads that poem. It might have worked better if they had just gone to the woods to live without trying to visit their friend. (When they make it to the woods, they don’t seem to be in a hurry to find Michael.)</div>
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Is it a loss of innocence kind of film? Possibly. Is it a random bunch of footage thrown together and called a film? Possibly. The credits read “Created by James Polakof. Screenplay by James Keach. From an Original Screenplay by David Pritchard.” That looks like a lot of work was put into this film. (Keach and Pritchard play the rednecks.) The first thing I thought was that this film must have meant something to someone. All those people combining their ideas must mean something. But, at the same time, I can’t help but thinks of James Keach in <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Evil Town</em>. Maybe <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Slashed Dreams</em> is really just an unfinished mess of a film that everyone had a crack at. Trying to finish it but not getting there.</div>
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But then, there are all the songs to take into consideration. There are about six of them that play at poignant parts in the film. They are sung by a woman who reminded me of Judy Collins and reminded me that I find that sort of voice to be terribly depressing. The songs speak what the characters are thinking or provide spiritual direction to Jenny and Robert. (Here’s hoping they can hear the singing.) Are they all part of the grand plan or were they added when the film didn’t really seem to cohere? I like to think it’s the former. It seems like a lot of work to have someone write a series of plot-specific songs rather than dubbing in a line here or there.</div>
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In the end, the more I talk, the less this film fits into the framework of this website. It’s not trash. It’s just a slow story about two people leaving the city and going to live in the woods. So, this could be the most redundant review you’ve ever read. As a wanna-be horror film, it’s boring as all get out. As a movie standing on its own, it’s almost very interesting. But, it’s too slow, too meandering, too over-bearing and too unfinished. It has its fine points but it’s nothing I would run to find.</div>
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Last thing: Is there a possibility that the rednecks (and possibly Michael) aren’t real? Could the rednecks represent fears and anger that they have stored up? Things that they need to work through and conquer in order to live in the woods. Could Michael represent some sort of ideal they are shooting for? The first time the couple skinny dip and see each other nude is the first time the rednecks appear. Guilt at dumping the old boyfriend? Fear of becoming intimate? Who knows? The next time the rednecks arrive is after they’ve made love. Symbolic? Could it stand for the boyfriend? Could it stand for accepting the fact that there is bad everywhere and it must be dealt with? The third and final time is when Robert fights them off. At the end of that, he is laughing at how pointless the anger and rage was. Jenny is at the point where she is about to fully embrace the woods. And, in an odd moment, Michael announces than the rednecks will not come back. Why? I don’t know but I believe him.</div>
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In the end, the film would become really interesting if the rednecks and Michael were all in the heads of Jenny and Robert. I think.</div>
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Old, old VHS. I love the look. The songs come through beautifully.</div>
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A coupon for 10% off the soundtrack.</div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">FINAL THOUGHTS</strong><br />
Disliking <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Slashed Dreams</em> for what the distributors did to sell it is understood but pointless. Especially when there are legitimate things in this film to make you dislike it. Is it boring? A bit. Is it interesting? A bit. Is it worth watching? I don’t know. There is a part of me that wants to watch it again and another part that just wants me to let it ride. How about this? The film is worth watching, but only as long as you haven’t seen <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Ogroff</em>.</div>
12/13/07Daniel B?http://www.blogger.com/profile/15523815647063071939noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5016594272815403008.post-2729236966347730682020-02-25T11:52:00.002-08:002020-02-25T11:52:42.830-08:00DEVIL'S EXPRESS<div style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; background-color: transparent; border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; color: black; font-family: &quot; font-size: 13px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; line-height: 19.5px; margin-bottom: 13px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; orphans: 2; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; text-align: left; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
Directed by Barry Rosen<br />
Simitar VHS</div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">THE FILM</strong><br />
Back in 1996-1997, Scott Reynolds and I had a weekly Movie Night Ritual. I would head to his apartment, sit down with some popcorn and soda pop and enjoy a sweet, sweet movie. We would alternate weeks. The whole shebang began with me showing him <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><a href="http://bleedingskull.com/?p=4528" style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; color: black; font-size: 13px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; text-decoration: underline;" title="Don’t Go In The Woods: Remembering Cherry, Dick, And All Their Friends">Don’t Go In The Woods</a></em>. He showed me <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">The Wild Bunch</em>. You can probably guess from those first choices that I didn’t always bring the class to these get-togethers. (Sometimes I did. I brought <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">It’s A Gift</em> and <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Brewster McCloud</em>.) Yes, I brought <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">The Last Slumber Party</em> and Quisenberry’s <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><a href="http://bleedingskull.com/?p=4827" style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; color: black; font-size: 13px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; text-decoration: underline;" title="Don’t Squeeze The Quisenberry: An Appreciation Of The Outing">Scream</a></em>. Scott brought classy stuff and a load of blaxploitation films. One of them was <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Gang Wars</em>, a film I’d never heard of, but any film starring Warhawk Tanzania has to be great. And, it turns out my prediction was right. This is an exploitation film of the first order.</div>
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If a blaxplotation film begins with a prologue sent in “CHINA 200 BC”, then you’re in great hands. Just relax. Warhawk runs a kung fu school of some sort. He and his assistant, the hot-headed Roldan, head to Hong Kong for training. Roldan digs up an ancient amulet. A demon follows them back to New York City. It hides in the subway and kills folks. And, as always, this is just a small taste of what happens. It’s like describing Moby Dick as a book about some guys hunting a whale. The main plot is important but, oh those incidentals.</div>
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Multi-racial gang wars involving awesome kung fu fighting. Dumb honky cops. A demon in the subway tunnels killing people. Gold (lame?) overalls worn during the final fight. A scene that clearly has dialogue but has funky music dubbed over it instead. Warhawk vanishing for a large chunk of the second half so we can focus on other characters. And, even the VHS getting into the fun by replaying a 30-second scene at a subway platform. Hell, Brother Theodore even shows up! The film seems willing to film anything provided it’s entertaining. That is the sign of some steamy, fragrant exploitation. Something for everyone.</div>
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What does this film have that you might enjoy? Well, here’s something: The fight scenes. All the fight scenes look very well choreographed. I know this because it looks like they just filmed the cast practicing their moves. Everything moves a bit too slow. Punches don’t connect. Blood flies from people for no reason. And, when one fight scene begins with Roldan in a mesh top, Heaven is a place on Earth.</div>
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Warhawk keeps a strong presence throughout, even thought he does vanish for quite a stretch. The man has everything. He is a Kung Fu Master. He is respected by all, the gangs and the cops. He can kick your ass up and down the street and make you want to apologize to him for wasting his time. He, of course, has an awesome lady. They get a “Day Out” montage with a sweet, sexy soul number playing over it. And, we never see the woman before or after that scene, except briefly in the end. Why should we? We can infer that she must be great by her nearness to him. There must be another film where the romance is the main story and there’s a “Kick Ass” Montage in the middle where this movie happens.</div>
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I love a film with a “We’re just making this all up” feel to it. Hell, that’s what I’m doing right here. We follow Warhawk, the demon rises, then we follow the gangs, then some demon killing, then the cops, some gang fighting, some this and that. It’s all great. Each portion is so entertaining that you forget about the other bits until they reappear. Did you ever see <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Nashville</em>? It’s like that, except one has Henry Gibson and one has the Subway Demon.</div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">AUDIO AND VIDEO</strong><br />
Pretty awful. I think Scott’s copy was EP. My copy is an EP copy of his. If you can imagine that. Under all the EP bother, it looks like decent low-budget 70′s film except the print is far too dark. On my copy, you can’t see what’s happening during the final subway fight. Imagine my joy when, on a Code Red DVD, I saw a preview for <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Devil’s Express</em> and you can actually see what’s happening! Where’s that DVD?</div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">EXTRAS</strong><br />
I’m lucky I have this copy.</div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">FINAL THOUGHTS</strong><br />
There is always another one out there. Just when you think you’re hitting the end of the line and there is no more insanity left…This weekend, I saw <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Gone With The Pope</em> and reacquainted myself with this wonderful film. So, there is stuff out there, hiding away and kicking my ass when I least expect it. Thanks for finding this one, Scott. Movie Nights were awesome. Sorry about <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Frozen Scream</em>.</div>
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<em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Gang Wars</em> — watch it. Watch it now.</div>
03/08/10Daniel B?http://www.blogger.com/profile/15523815647063071939noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5016594272815403008.post-2848075933013643322020-02-25T11:52:00.001-08:002020-02-25T11:52:34.735-08:00CURSE OF THE HEADLESS HORSEMAN<div style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; background-color: transparent; border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; color: black; font-family: &quot; font-size: 13px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; line-height: 19.5px; margin-bottom: 13px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; orphans: 2; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; text-align: left; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
Directed by John Kirkland<br />
Something Weird DVD</div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">THE FILMS</strong><br />
“Grace & Ellis Entreprises Presents…”</div>
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(Or Grace and Dallas)</div>
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It’s really not about the horseman. This isn’t a Sleepy Hollow remake. It’s made by the man who made <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><a href="http://bleedingskull.com/?p=3896" style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; color: black; font-size: 13px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; text-decoration: underline;" title="Carnival Of Blood (1970)">Carnival Of Blood</a></em>. If you haven’t seen that film, then you might not be able to catch the rhythm and feel of this film. It seems like it’s starting off with a plot of some kind. Something about an inheritance is spoken by a very serious narrator of unknown provenance. Then, we meet “the kids”.</div>
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“The kids” are a bunch of grown-ups. They might be hippies. I’m not 100% sure. But, they all hang out together. And, when one of them inherits some land with a Wild West Show-thing on it, all his friends join him and decide to try and “put on a show”! But, there is a legend on this land: The Legend of the Tamal (I think that’s what’s being said) Moon. And, the longer they stay, the greater the chance that they will be menaced by the Headless Horseman who protects the land.</div>
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The scenes that seem very ad-libbed are the sure sign of The Kirtman! The narrator who goes on menacingly is very Un-Kirtman. But, he didn’t produce or write this one. All “the kids”, I would warrant a guess, are not actors. I would warrant another guess: They are friends of the producers or there is some sort of link. The main couple, the ones who seem very square with jobs and plans of marriage, seem like actors. I think I’ve seen the guy somewhere else. But, all “the kids” (and there are a lot of them) are glorious amateurs.</div>
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And, this is where the other film comparison slides in: <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><a href="http://bleedingskull.com/?p=1351" style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; color: black; font-size: 13px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; text-decoration: underline;" title="Howling: New Moon Rising, The (1994)">The Howling: New Moon Rising</a></em>. Clive Turner’s Valentine to the people of Pioneertown. That film has a plot, it has a lot of plot, but it moves and shift and vanishes under the weight of all the appearances by Turner’s friends and buddies…and all the little in-jokes (Dicktheria, anyone?). All those strange moments that everyone in the film laughs at that the viewer needs to watch multiple times just to sort out what the hell is happening.</div>
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<em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Curse Of The Headless Horseman</em> feels exactly like that, except not as well-shot. “The kids” are, generally, very vaguely defined. There’s the two showman guys, the “mystical” gal, the older couple who seem grounded, the slightly fey guy, the guys and gals that never quite get defined…they’re all here. Skippy, Jimmy, Bella Sue, Ron, “The HoDaddy!”, Dick Vermillion, Jennifer Brown and the Torrential Twins. And, they go on and on. They goof around, dance, do some comedy and keep the whole pace of the film off balance. When you think things should be swiftly moving towards the climax, people are still doing their party pieces.</div>
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Now, I love this movie. I think it’s full of joy. It’s people having a good time. Hanging out and goofing around in some of the cheapest looking shots ever. Look at those credits! Brilliant. It’s the fact that the film looks like a very cheap early-70s film coupled with the strange freeform feel of the characters and their stories. From the Wild West stunt men who seem to be real Wild West Stunt Men to the strange appearance by Ultra Violet to the ramblings of Solomon the “Old” Caretaker with his strange makeup to the cover of the Bob Dylan song being sung during the scene where the man is sexually assaulting his “girlfriend” behind the Stagecoach, the movie has it all. A focus, however, is required.</div>
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<em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Carnival Of Blood</em> should definitely be watched first.</div>
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“It is Beginning Again!”</div>
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“Enjoy the sunshine! Relax! Wander about. Soon it will be night! And there will be a Moon…a Special Moon.”</div>
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Like <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">The Last Slumber Party</em>, if you’re not paying full attention, this film looks like incoherent ramblings where nothing happens for long stretches. But, focus…focus. And, it’s all there. And, it’s bitchin’. Every single day things just keep getting bitchin’.</div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">AUDIO AND VIDEO</strong><br />
See: <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><a href="http://bleedingskull.com/?p=3896" style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; color: black; font-size: 13px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; text-decoration: underline;" title="Carnival Of Blood (1970)">Carnival Of Blood</a></em>.</div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">EXTRAS</strong><br />
Ditto.</div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">FINAL THOUGHTS</strong><br />
Some movies stand on their own. Some need the context of what’s happening around them. Sometimes, rarely, films need context that’s even further out. Ten minutes talk with the producer/writer of this film would clear everything up. I don’t want to have that conversation.</div>
05/27/10Daniel B?http://www.blogger.com/profile/15523815647063071939noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5016594272815403008.post-36572455975639277422020-02-25T11:52:00.000-08:002020-02-25T11:52:23.764-08:00DEVIL MONSTER<div style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; background-color: transparent; border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; color: black; font-family: &quot; font-size: 13px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; line-height: 19.5px; margin-bottom: 13px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; orphans: 2; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; text-align: left; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
Directed by S. Edwin Graham<br />
Something Weird VHS</div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">THE FILM</strong><br />
I think I knew that they’ve made movies this goofy across the 20th century. I just never really stumbled across one. When I watch very old films, I’m generally after classics or a film by someone whose work I know. <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Devil Monster</em> is probably one of the clearest, purest examples of the kind of thing we love at Bleeding Skull. Untouched by irony or any trends of its time (apart from pure, sweet exploitation), this film darts along doing something absolutely astounding, head-shaking or just plain Loony every single minute of its just-a-little-over-an-hour running time.</div>
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San Pedro or San Pietro is the initial setting. Robert loves a gal. But, she loves Jose. Jose went missing some time ago. So, Robert joins his Dad on a “tuna trip” to search the South Seas and find out what happened to Jose. And, they travel. And, they meet natives and they fight the <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Devil Monster</em> and it’s a constant burst of odd invention that resembles your Grandpa’s version of <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">A Night To Dismember</em>. A film cobbled together from all over the place to reach feature length.</div>
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First off, it’s all post dubbed and the soundtrack is so disasociated that I almost think that someone added the dub in years later. From their outfits and hairstyles, I think early to mid-30s. But, I’ve seen 1946 listed as the year of production. The footage with humans was not shot in 1946. It feels like some sort of “Young Man’s Adventure” that has gone straight to Insane Town. Maybe it’s filmed in 1946 but set in the 30s?</div>
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Second, and this is the kicker, there is a lot of stock footage. A lot of stock footage. Once they hit the sea, there is a long, long stretch of Robert narrating travel footage. He talks and talks. And, oddly enough, we see some topless native girls, which is, frankly, surprising. Most of this footage seems to have been shot silent. I mean, silent as in “Silent Movie Era”. Just the way people move in the footage…they are at the same speed as silent films.</div>
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You know in <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Night Of The Zombies</em> (Italian) when we see stock footage nowhere near the actors but the actors are supposed to be right there? This film does that…Footage of South Sea Natives hanging out is shown and Robert concocts all sorts of stories around their “interaction” with them. A man is shown waving madly at the camera and it becomes an invitation from a tribal chief to watch people swim. Then, we go to the underwater (or outside the aquarium) camera. Even though it’s all underwater, Robert knows the exact details of everything that’s happening.</div>
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More than half the film is stock footage. I would say that trumps <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Jungle Hell</em>. The movie has its own plot and tells its own story but it’s all joined to the wonderful stock footage in one big Stew of Adventure. After a time, especially in that first barrage, the sheer audacity of all the stock stuff is astounding. Who would have watched this? Someone who wanted to see bare breasts for a few seconds? Possibly. But, I like to think that there was someone like me back then. Someone who was wandering into theaters hoping that they’d see something really, really strange. Dale Burlap? Dave Bouffet? Have you seen this movie? Did you love it?</div>
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Looks and sounds terrible. But, who cares? At some points, whole chunks of the film are missing as Robert’s narration hops ahead bit by bit. Where’s my Blu-Ray?</div>
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I have the tape from SWV. There is a montage of their titles at the beginning and at the end. That’s it.</div>
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Insanity of the Finest grade, as fine as my first pair of long pants. This movie appeared in my life, left me dumbfounded and then asked me to watch again. They were really as nutty then as we are now. Thank God for exploitation.</div>
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07/29/10</div>
<b></b><i></i><u></u><sub></sub><sup></sup><strike></strike><br />Daniel B?http://www.blogger.com/profile/15523815647063071939noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5016594272815403008.post-50799748313043411302019-11-21T10:41:00.005-08:002019-11-21T10:41:52.938-08:00EVILS OF THE NIGHT<div style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; background-color: transparent; border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; color: black; font-family: &quot; font-size: 13px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; line-height: 19.5px; margin-bottom: 13px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; orphans: 2; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; text-align: left; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
Directed by Mardi Rustam<br />
Shriek Show/Media Blasters DVD (Now out on Vinegar Syndrome Blu)</div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">THE FILM</strong><br />
Why does Mardi Rustam hate me? I’m pretty sure I’ve never met him. I’m also pretty sure he’s probably a real nice guy. It seemed that he might like me at first. He top-loaded his film <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Evils Of The Night</em> with sexadelic shenanigans that seemed to say “Welcome to my Nude World. Enjoy.” But, the nudity and such began to wear me down. It became less fun. By time I was 45 minutes in, I even hated me.</div>
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Mardi, why?</div>
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<em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Evils Of The Night</em> smells funny. You know the feeling, You lean against a wall or a couch and you smell something and it ain’t on your shoe. You sit there, sniffing and frowning. What the hell is that? Where is that coming from? Why does this odor haunt me? <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Evils Of The Night</em> looks like a film. It has actors you’ll recognize in it. It has a decent spaceship model at the beginning and the end. And yet, that’s not me, is it? No. I’m as clean as a cloud after a rainstorm. <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Evils Of The Night</em>, let me see your hands!</div>
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A bunch of aliens land on Earth to kidnap and do something or other to young people. Why? To save their planet, I would imagine. What is it they’re doing? I’m sure they told me, but I’ll be damned if I can remember. Let’s just say they need to drain blood. And, let’s just say that John Carradine, the head alien, needs the blood to replenish his people’s wasted world. He has help from Julie Newmar, Tina Louise, Aldo Ray and Neville Brand. Holy crap! That’s a lot of recognizable help. The first half hour of this movie is loaded with nudity and fooling around. The second half hour has a lot of running around combined with a large amount of prowling around. The final half hour has our main characters tied to posts and threatened by Neville Brand. It all feels a lot like <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Evil Town</em>, which has a similar plot and which I re-watched for this review and…I liked <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Evil Town</em> more than <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Evils Of The Night</em>. Maybe that’s why Mardi hates me. He knew I liked <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Evil Town</em> better. I don’t know.</div>
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When folks who have never made a movie end up with bad dialogue, awful characters and ripe acting, you take it and move on. When a seasoned pro ends up with the same, I can feel the disdain. Watching this movie was like buying a DVD at a store where the hip cashier clearly hates you and the choice you’ve made even though he or she would be out of a job if you weren’t buying that DVD. No one comes away happy.</div>
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<em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Evils Of The Night</em>, sure, has its charms. Nudity, gore, fun character actors and a beach scene or two lends itself to something that isn’t all bad smells and strange stains. But, at the same time, I feel like Mardi may have been laughing at me while I watched this film. He created the film and just left it there with the knowledge that one day I would watch it and his feelings for me would become clear.</div>
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Why, Mardi, why? “Mardi” is Polynesian for “world”. You’ve got a great name, Mardi. Why be so mean? Can’t we discuss this? I’m a big fan of <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Eaten Alive</em>.</div>
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Sounds fine. My DVD was full frame. Actually, there were very tiny lines on the top and the bottom. What would that be, 1:45? It looks great. It didn’t have that shiny/hazy look that I usually associate with films from this time period.<br />
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The Vinegar Syndrome Blu looks beautiful. (As does their<i> Evil Town</i> Blu, which I think is a much more fun film.) If you want to watch this goofballery looking gorgeous (I did), pick it up.</div>
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A decent preview that could trick you into watching it if you didn’t know better. There are also some stills and posters that feature tremendously prominent nipples on the young lady being restrained by aliens on the cover.</div>
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There were some other previews. The only one I watched was <i>The Being. </i>I’ve finally got it on Blu.<br />
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The Vinegar Syndrome Blu has some fine extras. Explore!</div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">FINAL THOUGHTS</strong><br />
I watched <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Evils Of The Night</em>. As I watched it, I thought I heard the director laughing at me. When you think “Well, not as good as <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Evil Town</em>…”, something has gone horribly wrong somewhere. The sad thing is: I’ll probably watch it again. I’m just like that.</div>
08/09/07Daniel B?http://www.blogger.com/profile/15523815647063071939noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5016594272815403008.post-4117886391575463342019-11-16T17:02:00.000-08:002019-11-16T17:02:35.185-08:00PANIC<div style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; background-color: transparent; border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; color: black; font-family: &quot; font-size: 13px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; line-height: 19.5px; margin-bottom: 13px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; orphans: 2; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; text-align: left; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
Directed by Tonino Ricci<br />
Gorgon VHS</div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">THE FILM</strong><br />
What is going on? Why is the army here? This is the United Kingdom! We have rights! What are those noises in the sewers? Why are there so many middlemen in government? Why do we live in the one village in Britain populated by nothing but Italians? Why is David Warbeck the only British guy here?</div>
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Where is Professor Adams? You told me he went fishing! Why is all his fishing stuff in his home? Wasn’t he at the heart of the chemical leak the other day? I noticed that his disappearance coincides with the rash of killings breaking out around here. Why won’t you tell me what’s going on?!</div>
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Is that a crazy-ass melting face mutant killing everyone? Is he horny? Why does he kill so many nice ladies who are nude or nude-ish? Why-Why is there such a long, boring chase in the sewers near the end? And, where the heck did they find those two guys in the plane?</div>
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I don’t like when the army sets up roadblocks and shoots at me! Why are they doing that? “Army maneuvers”? Do you think I am a stupid man? I may be panicking but I’m not a jerk. You are!</div>
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And your mama!</div>
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Why are we all dubbed so funny? Are we Italian? What is that plane doing spiraling down towards us filled with nerve gas? Who is ordering all this? I keep going up the line of government to get to the person in charge but everyone has a “superior”? What is happening?</div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">AUDIO AND VIDEO</strong><br />
Why are some shots completely dark? Why is everything so hazy? Am I infected? Why do we all sound like we’re talking in a large closet even when we’re outside in a crowd?</div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">EXTRAS</strong><br />
Answer my questions!<br />
<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><br style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: transparent; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;" />
FINAL THOUGHTS</strong><br />
In the end, I didn’t <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Panic</em> as much as I thought I would. But, the suspense gripped me for 91 minutes. They are Italians! Professor Adams is a mutant! The government wants to kill me! And, these 91 minutes got better as they went along but got a little dull near the end.</div>
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Do you like Italians? Then, you should try to go buck-ass nuts for the duration of this movie. It’s not bad.</div>
01/31/08Daniel B?http://www.blogger.com/profile/15523815647063071939noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5016594272815403008.post-32841159334992831252019-11-05T10:14:00.000-08:002019-11-05T10:14:44.434-08:00DIDN'T YOU HEAR...<div style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; background-color: transparent; border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; color: black; font-family: &quot; font-size: 13px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; line-height: 19.5px; margin-bottom: 13px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; orphans: 2; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; text-align: left; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
Directed by Skip Sherwood<br />
A.N.E Home Video VHS</div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">THE FILM</strong><br />
When I reviewed <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><a href="http://bleedingskull.com/?p=1597" style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; color: black; font-size: 13px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; text-decoration: underline;" title="Force On Thunder Mountain, The (1978)">The Force On Thunder Mountain</a></em>, I wondered who the film was made for. Well, the same company “presents” <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Didn’t You Hear…</em> (American National Enterprises) and I would like to ask the same question. I’ve watched it four times and every time I watch with fascination but steadily failing interest as I approach the inevitable (in some ways) end and then think “Who is this for?” (Of course, it doesn’t need to be “for” anyone but it’s fun to think about. For example, who is <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">The Last Slumber Party</em> for? Answer: Me.)</div>
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Kevin is a college freshman. He’s got a beefy Gary Busey-like friend named James (played by Gary Busey). Kevin seems like a regular college kid to me. He’s a bit overwhelmed, a bit awkward with the ladies and not quite sure what place his parents now hold in his life. He is also loaded with “philosophical thoughts” about the world around him. So, in essence, from the little we see of his actual life, he’s like almost every college kid around, discounting those who are there on athletic scholarships. In college, I was pretty good around the ladies. Apart from that, I was very much like Kevin.</div>
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Kevin keeps disappearing into his daydreams. A very complex world, ish. In this place, he and his friends travel in a boat called The Queen of Sheba, of which Kevin is the Captain. They play “games”, they question the System, they spout various philosophies and burn their possessions. When Kevin gets mixed up in a real life sorority prank, the gal in the prank, Paige, becomes part of the dreamland. We spend a lot of time in this waking dream, most of it actually. Eventually, because the Sheba crew is young and doing their own thing, a group of square “Islanders”, led by Paige’s military man dad, come after them with guns to bring them down and/or harsh their buzz.</div>
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It’s a very interesting movie, filled with psychedelic effects and wonderful synths and a lot of chatter about life and death. Some of it doesn’t quite make sense. But, it’s all pretty fascinating. The filmmakers were clearly up to something. It seems that they are saying “Young people have their own way of doing things. The squares shouldn’t get in their way.” A good way to think of the Sheba crew is as variations of a biker gang but without as much facial hair.</div>
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The film has one flaw that I think gets in the way of what it’s up to. Now, it started as a feeling that nagged me but I couldn’t pin down. It’s not the slightly embarrassing “Happy Birthday World Day” bit. It’s not the moments when the film seems to be going somewhere and then slows way down. It’s not the over explained “symbolic” moments. As far as I’m concerned, if this is all in the mind of a young man, than there will be pretentious and awkward bits. That’s just how we are. Love us or leave us, baby.</div>
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Out of that last thought springs the problem: Even the trailer describes this as a “symbolic” film…but I’m not sure it is. Yes, the filmmakers may have planned it that way but something shanghais it. The bulk of the film is the daydream of an awkward college kid. It’s not a Bergman-esque journey through the Symbols of Mankind. It’s the brain wanderings of a slightly goofy young adult. Daydreams are daydreams. They are extended fantasies in your head that you keep control over, unlike dreams. Now, he may be actually dreaming some of this but whenever we enter the other world…he is awake and thinking. So, this isn’t a Series of Universal Symbols being laid out for all mankind. It’s an awkward kid passing time in his mind. I wouldn’t be surprised if Kevin was a writer who was just thinking up this idea for a script or a novel. The filmmakers didn’t seem to have the courage of their convictions. They should have done a full on “Symbolic Film”. As it stands, we don’t see enough of Kevin’s real world to be able to draw all the parallels we need between it and the Land of the Queen of Sheba. I think that would have made for a richer experience. As it stands, the sum of the parts make up a weak whole. Luckily, the parts are pretty darn interesting. If it doesn’t completely hang together in the end, you can, at least, enjoy the journey. Maybe that’s the point.</div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">AUDIO AND VIDEO</strong><br />
The synths sound fine. The picture is horrible. But, this is the only way we can see it, so take it all in.</div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">EXTRAS</strong><br />
Five trailers for films put out by A.N.E. <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">The Invincible Barbarian</em>, <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Didn’t You Hear</em>, <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Hooch</em>, and two others.</div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">FINAL THOUGHTS</strong><br />
I think the film needs to be watched. We can blab about it when everyone has seen it. It is a flawed film with a story that’s a little vaguer than it should be. But, it is a one-of-a-kind film. It’s rather fascinating and full of ideas, some better than others. Enjoy it.</div>
03/18/10Daniel B?http://www.blogger.com/profile/15523815647063071939noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5016594272815403008.post-83775011267021971612019-06-02T13:33:00.000-07:002019-06-02T13:33:43.188-07:00CATHY'S CURSE<div style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; background-color: transparent; border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; color: black; font-family: &quot; font-size: 13px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; line-height: 19.5px; margin-bottom: 13px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; orphans: 2; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; text-align: left; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
Directed by Eddy Matalon<br />
Continental Video VHS</div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">THE FILM</strong><br />
“You and I both know that I’ve had a nervous breakdown.”</div>
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<em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Cathy’s Curse</em> is all about a little girl and her dad dying in a car crash during some very slippery synth-filled opening credits. The girl’s brother (now grown and working for someone-or-other doing some-such-thing) returns, years later, to the family home with his wife and daughter, Cathy. Cathy finds a doll belonging to the little girl and becomes possessed. Havoc is wrecked and dirty language stays well within the barriers of good taste.</div>
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My favorite <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Exorcist</em>-homage (as it were) is <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">The Possessed</em>. The best! Where is the DVD uncut and letterboxed? I don’t know. I’ll ask my man on the street.</div>
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Well, I asked him. He yelled something about snakes in the garbage cans and tried to run me over with his shopping cart. Target is not getting that cart back anytime soon.</div>
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Why mention <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">The Possessed</em> in a review for <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Cathy’s Curse</em>? Frankly, I don’t remember. I like it though. And, I like <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Cathy’s Curse</em>. Most of it. At least, I remember liking it. I could be thinking of something else. This film is very Canadian. If you’ve seen <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Ghostkeeper</em> or <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Rock ‘N’ Roll Nightmare</em>, you’ve been wrapped up in the Canadian thing. They feel a bit like other horror films you might have seen, but do their own thing. <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Cathy’s Curse</em> feels a bit like <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">The Exorcist</em> but it feels more like <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">The Exorcist</em> if, before you watch it, someone says, “Oh, this is an <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Exorcist</em> knock-off.” Little girl swearing. Yep. Killing people. Sure. Strange make-up on her face. Eventually. Odd voices. Why not? But, somewhere in the mix things went a little goofy. The film brews its own rhythm, atmosphere and structure.*</div>
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Unfortunately, “goofy” is a two-way street. “You whore! You big, fat whore!” That’s awesome. The amusement on the faces of the little girl yelling it and the old, drunk guy with the big beard makes for a good time. On the other hand, the lack of any kind of pacing, well…It just means that the viewer relies on set pieces rather than momentum and story. And, some of the set pieces are a little on the bland side. Especially when I started to think, “How come the dad can’t piece together the fact that his daughter’s acting goofy, his wife is going mental and people keep dying?” It’s as odd as the house in <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Pet Sematary</em> with the busy road in front of it. Oh, it worked in the book. In the movie, I can’t imagine why a sane person would move there with a child. And the thing here is that I rarely think of this kind of stuff during a movie. Usually, I let the movie carry me along. If I am thinking it, it’s really blatantly coming across.</div>
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I like Canada. I grew up near Niagara Falls. There’s a picture of me being menaced by the Frankenstein’s Monster while in a backpack on my Dad’s back that is awesome. (I was a baby. This wasn’t last year.) Things go kind of odd when they go north or south of the U.S. border. The Canadian oddness is subtler than the Mexican oddness but don’t let the lack of wrestlers put you off. Again, I was making a point about the movie and my mind drifted away. Suffice it to say, <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Cathy’s Curse</em> is not something I’ll go back to, most likely. But, I might. The setting and some of the individual moments are nice. It’s a movie that was more fun to watch than to think about.**</div>
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So, maybe that means you should watch it once and go from there.</div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">AUDIO AND VIDEO</strong><br />
<em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Cathy’s Curse</em> works best on video. The Continental tape looks all muddy and worn, just as a VHS should.</div>
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Boy, that Chilling Classics 50 DVD Pack really craps out with this one. The film has all sorts of digital video hoohah going on. People keep breaking up into their constituent digital parts. It’s a touch distracting. I think, at one moment, Dad became a series of ambulatory ones and zeroes. The VHS would be a better choice.<br />
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(By the way, the Blu-Ray is brilliant.)</div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">EXTRAS</strong><br />
An upgrade from “whore” to “big fat whore” is an extra in my book.</div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">FINAL THOUGHTS</strong><br />
Cathy’s possessed. And, it ain’t half bad. A double feature with <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Ruby</em> would be ideal.</div>
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*I have seen one review that said this was an “<em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Omen</em> rip-off”. I don’t think it’s apocalyptic enough. <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Audrey Rose</em> rip-off, maybe. But, then that sort of ties back to <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">The Exorcist</em> anyway so I’m standing my ground.</div>
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**Here’s something I noticed on a proof read: The opening quote about the breakdown is a bit of blatant exposition from the mother to the father. I had been planning on mentioning it in the review. But, my mind just strolled away and I left the quote up there. Why? I think it’s there to amuse me as I wrote. The movie will not stick to my ribs, as it were.</div>
05/11/06Daniel B?http://www.blogger.com/profile/15523815647063071939noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5016594272815403008.post-78841600766732572842019-06-02T13:21:00.000-07:002019-06-02T13:21:00.548-07:00CARNIVAL OF BLOOD<div style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; background-color: transparent; border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; color: black; font-family: &quot; font-size: 13px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; line-height: 19.5px; margin-bottom: 13px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; orphans: 2; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; text-align: left; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
Directed by Leonard Kirtman<br />
Something Weird DVD</div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">THE FILMS</strong><br />
Nothing feels like those “First Half of the 70s” American Horror films. With no formula in place, they did whatever they thought would scare people. And, that involved actual scare tactics, lots of gore, sleaziness, downbeat endings and anything else they could think of. Oh, throw big sloppy synths in there, too.</div>
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Some of these were like horror movies of old. Some of these were mysteries. Some of them followed psycho killers around. Some of them went there own way, into odd, odd places where boredom rode tandem with insanity.</div>
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Hi, Leonard Kirtman. Hello, <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Carnival Of Blood</em>.</div>
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Coney Island. We’re at one of those games that involve throwing darts at balloons and winning stuffed animals that, frankly, look crappy but seem to be the height of Carnival Prize Junk. I suppose it’s not the prize itself; it’s the excitement involved in winning it. The thrill of the darts being thrown, the water being sprayed, things being tossed or what have you.</div>
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I love carnivals. I love to ride the slightly-scary rides. For some reason, I prefer to watch others play the games. I think if I had an endless supply of cash there would be games played all night long. But, I could feel the scam rising off of some of the games. And, I couldn’t allow myself to spend my money on something like that. I’d rather buy a Fat Pack of Fried Dough and a watery soft drink of some sort.</div>
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Tom and Gimpy run the stand in this movie. And, the people flood by and some stop and play. Some lose, some win. Some die. Well, it can’t all be pizza and Fried Oreos. Gimpy has a hunchback and gets angry. He seems very suspicious. Tom seems like a regular guy. Unless you start to talk to him, then he ends up seeming a little odd too. A local attorney is roping in his artiste girlfriend to help out investigating the murders. The whole thing doesn’t need to be a mystery. It could have been some random fella coming in and killing everyone. But, there is a bit of mystery here, which is not much of a mystery in the end.</div>
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The movie has a glorious cyclic structure to it. A couple (or, in once case, a woman) show up and argue or stumble around the carnival. They play the dart throwing game. They incur the wrath of Tom & Gimpy. They go to the fortune teller. The woman is horribly mutilated. The attorney talks to his girlfriend. They argue. Repeat.</div>
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The actors wander through the place passing by endless crowds of people. Many of them stare directly at the camera. Sometimes the boom is in shot. But, it’s so obviously in shot most of the time that it took me ages to realize that it was the boom. It’s like the sun. You don’t pay attention to it unless someone points it out.</div>
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Folk-type songs float across the soundtrack, including one about carnivals. Synths flap all over the soundtrack. They don’t seem to make music. They just make odd noises and set weird, weird moods. It matches the strange, red, wet blood that seems to flow into everything.</div>
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There’s something about a horror film (or any film, really) set in a certain place at a certain time. I’m pretty sure Coney Island doesn’t look like this anymore. So, to see everyone meander around it is a joy. It’s the exact opposite of timeless but it’s not dated. It’s right of that time. “Dated”, I think, implies that whatever it was is trying to be of its time. <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Carnival Of Blood</em> is not of its nothing. Kirtman just took the cameras down there and shot. It’s all so off-the-cuff that the proprietors may not have even known that this movie was occurring. Wouldn’t that make it even more exciting?</div>
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The quality of the film is what it is. It’s poorly made. Poorly written (if, indeed, it was). And, the structure can put you right to sleep. But, if you watch the movie purely to see a horror film that is as slick as anything else, well, I don’t know why you’re reading this. Maltin still publishes a yearly thing, I believe. He’ll help you. There was a remake of <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Prom Night</em> a few years ago. Check It Out!</div>
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<em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Carnival Of Blood</em> is an experience. It’s 88 minutes of oddballery. A strange burp of a film that sits in my mind long after I watch it. When it ends, I want to watch it again. And, I want to watch it’s co-feature <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><a href="http://bleedingskull.com/?p=3778" style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; color: black; font-size: 13px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; text-decoration: underline;" title="Curse Of The Headless Horseman (1973)">Curse Of The Headless Horseman</a></em>, of which more shortly.</div>
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Very rough shape. The film is saturated with green emulsion lines, scratches, and general noise. In this case, the lower-than-normal quality of the print isn’t a big deal at all. The gritty aesthetic of <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Carnival</em> seems tailor made for this kind of presentation.</div>
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Not as many supplements as other Something Weird double features, but definitely some great stuff. Two TV spots for the features and several similarly-themed trailers are present, all of which make for a super fun watch. There’s also a gallery of horror poster and ad art, which carries over from several other SWV discs.</div>
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Aha, and the short subjects. Included here are <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">The Hunchback Of Massapequa Park</em> and <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Hands Of Justice</em>, two teenaged Super 8 films from the 70s. This is the kind of stuff we love. Completely unknown and seemingly picked straight from an old attic somewhere, these two wonders flow with youthful good times. <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Hunchback</em> runs six minutes and follows around a teenaged, fake-mustached hunchback as he terrorizes suburbia. In <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Hands Of Justice</em>, our hero, Roy, daydreams about various gory revenge scenarios involving the thug that mugged him. If you enjoy this sort of thing, you must see them. Rounding out the shorts is an old soundie reel titled <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Carnival Show</em>. It’s in great shape and contains a few singing and dancing bits with a carnival barker.</div>
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I don’t believe that Leonard Kirtman was a weird man. But, this film is sort of like, if you don’t, for example, cook and you sit down with a recipe or you’ve seen someone make something and you think “I can do that!”…And, you start to cook…maybe you follow the recipe or maybe you don’t. An hour later, you have created something that looks wrong, maybe tastes wrong or is so different from what you wanted to do that no one can figure out what the heck you’ve done.</div>
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This film is like that meal, with Burt Young as seasoning.</div>
05/27/10Daniel B?http://www.blogger.com/profile/15523815647063071939noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5016594272815403008.post-8950744397096096282019-03-06T18:27:00.002-08:002019-03-06T18:29:24.513-08:00Don't Squeeze The Quisenberry<div style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px rgb(0, 0, 0); font: 400 13px/19.5px "quot"; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0px 0px 13px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: left; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="color: #444444;">Why dislike Byron Quisenberry’s <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">The Outing</em> aka <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Scream</em>? It’s a modest, quiet horror film that seems to have one foot in the early 70s and the other firmly resting in the early 80s. It has a calm, steady rhythm broken up by loud moments and a climax that is suddenly there and gone. It has a rather cryptic explanation for why it’s doing what it’s doing, which has a strange sense of dread wrapped around it. And, every few minutes the camera goes off on odd tangents quite unlike anything else in American films at that time.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #444444;">If you spend 82 minutes watching a slow film that doesn’t seem to really do much, I can understand the need for something (anything) to justify the end. <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">The Outing</em> presents it’s explanations very assuredly but there is something missing. And, it’s not the something missing of <a href="http://bleedingskull.com/nobody-cares-about-grades-an-appreciation-of-final-exam/" style="border: 0px rgb(0, 0, 0); font-size: 13px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: underline;" title="Nobody Cares About Grades: An Appreciation Of Final Exam"><em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Final Exam</em></a> and the motives of its killer, which is explained in a comment made by one of the characters in an off-handed manner. It’s not the “Who is that guy exactly?” of <a href="http://bleedingskull.com/dont-go-in-the-woods-remembering-cherry-dick-and-all-their-friends/" style="border: 0px rgb(0, 0, 0); font-size: 13px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: underline;" title="Don’t Go In The Woods: Remembering Cherry, Dick, And All Their Friends"><em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Don’t Go In The Woods</em></a>. The Madman in that one is a Wildman raised in the woods (with a decent piece of real estate) who is protecting his home.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #444444;"><em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">The Outing</em> is different…But, before I discuss what the heck is going on in the film, I should probably give out a little plot. I don’t know how much of this is needed. A group of around 12 people (2 guides, 10 vacationers) are on some sort of canoe trip. They spend the night on an old Western ghost town street, which may be a real Old West street or an Old West Street movie set, long abandoned. They seem to be heading somewhere more important and just staying here for the night. Soon after darkness sets in someone/ something begins to kill them. The next morning, their canoes are gone and they have to stay in the town for another day. That night, the killing begins again but not before a strange visit from Woody Strode on a horse. He tells an odd tale about a Ship’s Captain and the troubles they had on the sea. Then, he goes. The killer makes an all-out attack on the group until Woody shoots it. The killer is never seen.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #444444;">All of this is framed by an odd bit in a room (which I am convinced is somewhere in the ghost town) with a couple of paintings and a dresser with a clock and three figurines on it. The figurines are of the butcher, the baker, the candlestick maker. The opening is a shot of a painting of a ship on a windswept sea. Then, we see the figurines and then the clock, which strikes midnight. The sound of something being sliced through is heard and two things drop. We pan back and see the baker and candlestick maker have lost their heads. The eyes of the butcher turn, fast to the camera.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #444444;">I know the rhyme. These three men were in a tub getting up to something. No one quite knows why they were there. Something dirty, something wicked. The butcher here seems to silence the other two. But, they’re not meant to be on a whaling type-ship, are they? They’re in a tub or a small rowboat. The ending moments don’t really help either.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #444444;">We see that the clock is at midnight. The butcher loses his head. We pan up to see the portrait of an African American gentleman who I believe is the captain. The camera fades to the date in the corner: 1851. So, the killer is the ghost of the captain inhabiting the ghost town. It kills anyone who enters there. Woody Strode is his first mate. His rambling tale is an apology for the Captain’s behavior. And, in the end, he stops the killing and the butcher dies.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #444444;">Does that sound right? Because that is not completely from the movie. I’m extrapolating a bit. I’m wondering if the killer is invisible. That would explain why we never ever see it but we see cleavers, scythes and axes lifted slowly off of walls. Maybe that’s how it is able to so easily get everywhere. People turn and see a cleaver floating through the air and then it whacks them! Who are the baker and the candlestick maker then? The Company Men? Is it a black revenging themselves on white thing? Why these people? What crime could Alvy Moore have committed? And, why is a Captain from the 1850s inhabiting an old ghost town street somewhere on the West Coast, nowhere near the ocean? Doesn’t it seem an odd spot? Shouldn’t he be haunting a wharf in New England?</span></div>
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<span style="color: #444444;">I’ve watched this film about twenty times. Every time I do I get a little bit closer to what I think is going on but I never quite hit it. Sometimes when I get to the end of one viewing I forget what I learned the previous time. For me, that’s all part of the fun. But, there is more to the film’s appeal than unexplainable motives. There is the whole atmosphere, the style, the odd cast and the general overall creepiness of the whole affair.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #444444;">I know I may stand alone here but this film still creeps me out. The slow pans through the ghost town at night give me a shaky feeling whenever I watch them. People don’t say much in this movie. And, many times, the camera floats off of them when they do. The dark buildings are scary. When the one man is yanked back into the building and the doorway slams in the camera’s face (lens), my skin crawls. Lou sleeping under the staircase and hearing something go up the steps sends me shivering. The way Alvy Moore seems to see something in one of the buildings and does a little spin makes me glad that Mr. Kimball never went on vacation. And, the few shock moments, the moments when the film bursts onto another level, are as effective as they are surprising. The two big moments I’m thinking of are when the motorcycle rider is tossed through the door and when the axe slams down on Andy’s neck. If you are caught in the rhythm of the film, these two moments can stop your heart for a second.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #444444;">The whole thing moves at such a slow, deliberate pace but in a different way than other films of this nature. The camera is almost always moving here. There are no shortages of close-ups and coverage in the scenes. This isn’t a film where the camera sits on one end of the room and everyone acts and the next scene begins. The camera has a different set of motives from what we see on screen. And, it knows where the weapons are, which is always a plus.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #444444;">The camera focuses on a person as they look around or say something. Then, the camera will slowly pan or track away as if it knows that we know what’s going on there but something else more interesting is occurring elsewhere. I don’t recall ever quite seeing anything like it in a film. Possibly in some Argento stuff, where something is occurring and the camera suddenly floats away to reveal something else to the left of the main characters. But, <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">The Outing</em> has less purpose than an Argento film. I always felt that an Argento tangent is very important to the film. It’s revealing information to us. Quisenberry pans or tracks away and seems to be exploring half the time. At first, it’s curious but, once the killings start, it’s just being mischievous by driving us towards the killer when it knows that you can’t kill the camera.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #444444;">When the Final Girl is a pudgy guy somewhere in his thirties (LOU!) you know that something’s askew. The film feels a bit like a slasher but the ages of the cast (probably late twenties to one real old guy) belie that. I’m not sure what Quisenberry was keeping an eye on but it’s not the pulse of the nation at that time. There’s no nudity and very little gore. The characters are so vague that every time I watch it and see several women huddled together I always think “1…2…3? Where’d the other one come from?” Lou and the jerk are the only ones who stand out. But, neither of them really do much. Everyone is kind of awkward around each other once they realize that any of them could be the killer. So, there are lots of long silences. No one is witty, no one is a wiseass. They’re just normal people who get trapped in an odd, life-threatening situation. They become even less relevant as characters when you think that Woody Strode’s speech is purely for us. They can’t possibly benefit from it because they would need to see the room that we see in order for real sense to be made.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #444444;">So, what do we have? A deliberate, creepy film that revels in its own low-key oddness. That, from a distance, like <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Final Exam</em> and <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">The Last Slumber Party</em> seems to be a regular run-of-the-mill horror film that never seems to take off. It seems to want to be a part of the early 80′s slasher craze but doesn’t really know how. It seems classier. When Andy is thrown around the saloon, it seems rather violent until you think that Quisenberry is a stunt man so, naturally, any stunt work is going to be stellar. Why is there no blood? Because, it’s about the stunt, more than the blood. I wish there had been more moments like this but it’s not a problem. <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">The Outing</em> is a film that seems to very clearly say “Here’s what’s going on!” and then defiantly makes little sense. By that I mean, I think Byron knew what was going on but he can’t quite get it to work, to connect. People have to make too many suppositions based on vague information. It’s all of these elements that bring the film together for me and make it something that I enjoy returning to, once or twice a year.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #444444;">It’s not a well-loved or even liked film. And, its pace can be a bit much. (I almost always drift off during Woody’s tale.) But, watch it with an open mind and just feel it…as it were…The film works. I’d love to see a nice, widescreen version of it. But, I don’t know about commentary and such. Once I find out what’s going on, it may lose some of the magic. I don’t remember Bergman saying exactly what <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">The Silence</em> was about. I’d hope that Mr. Quisenberry would be relatively calm about what he was up to. Keep the mystery.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #444444;">We champion all kinds of odd stuff around here. For example, <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Frozen Scream</em>. If you don’t like it, well, you don’t like it. But, if you’ve read some of my stuff and you have a vague idea of what I like, you may gauge why this film has such a special spot on my movie-watching list. Its singular, rather oddball vision makes it worth the time of anyone willing to sit still and absorb. And, one of the great things here is that I don’t think it was meant to be anything more than a slasher film like any other. It’s the gulf in between what I think it was supposed to be and what it is that makes it so interesting, so re-watchable.</span></div>
Daniel B?http://www.blogger.com/profile/15523815647063071939noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5016594272815403008.post-18322848808336145442019-02-19T11:24:00.002-08:002019-02-19T11:24:54.836-08:00HEY, THERES NAKED BODIES ON MY TV!<div style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px rgb(0, 0, 0); font: 400 13px/19.5px "quot"; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0px 0px 13px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: left; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="color: red;">Directed by Mack Campbell</span><br />
<span style="color: red;">Media Home Entertainment VHS</span></div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><span style="color: red;">THE FILM</span></strong><br />
<span style="color: red;">The title is not referring to us watching it at home but the fact that characters from TV shows we loved are suddenly naked on the big screen, right before our eyes. If this movie had been made in the 60s, the three shows chosen would have been <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Hazel</em>, <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">The Munsters</em> and <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Bonanza</em> and it would have been a very “interesting” movie. Mainly for pervs. But, in the 70s, things are just perfect. The movie consists of three segments parodying <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Happy Days</em>, <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Welcome Back Kotter</em> and <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Barney Miller</em>. And, the parodies are filled with naked people. Most of these naked people are having an awesome time, probably due to their nudity.</span></div>
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<span style="color: red;">In its own special way, this movie is superb. Setting aside the nudity, we have…A strange linking device in a TV studio with a janitor and a naughty clown. There are very odd pornographic cartoons that keep cropping up. There’s a “Very Special” montage at the end. And, there are the parodies themselves. Having been a fan of <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Happy Days</em> and been familiar with the other shows, they feel pretty right to me. <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Kotter</em> is set in the classroom. <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Barney Miller</em> is set in the police station. <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Happy Days</em> is set in The Fonz’s (The Bonz!) apartment. Each bit goes on a little too long. Nude people dancing around and groping one another (although the guys don’t always get that nude) can only sustain one for so long. The <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Happy Days</em> segment is more of a series of naughty couples coupling. The other two are just piles of nudity….and all of it is covered with…a laugh track!</span></div>
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<span style="color: red;">That’s the super-special touch. The very first time the laugh track goes off…the movie enters another realm. It’s so simple and yet so perfect. The actors are different, yes. But, a lot of the jokes were no worse or better than the actual jokes in the shows themselves and the characters are the same. The laugh track nudges every parody that much closer to being exactly like the original show and, by extension, making everything that much naughtier.</span></div>
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<span style="color: red;">What a strange adventure this film is…I’ve had this tape for years but never thought to review it until right now…The film is so obscure and so strange. Where’d it come from? I don’t have to ask why it was made. I can guess that. Was there another version with raunchier stuff in it? Did the casts of the actual TV shows ever see this? So many questions…</span></div>
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<span style="color: red;">I will admit to some boredom while watching, though. Each segment has its set-up and then the nudity begins and it kind of goes on a few minutes past the point when good structural taste would say “Give it a rest.” But, aren’t most of these films like this? I don’t know. I actually haven’t seen a lot of them. I find it can be hard to watch them.</span></div>
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<span style="color: red;">Hmmm….In the end, I’m not sure these softcore extravaganzas are for me. What can you say about them? Luckily, this one is goofy and strange and it runs a proud and erect rampage over a nostalgic part of my mind, which I appreciate. I really think they should have chosen a fourth show. <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Laverne & Shirley</em>? Think of the possibilities. The filmmaker struggles to get the film up to a certain running time are amusing but not always thrilling. Lenny and Squiggy and Mrs. DeFazio…Let your mind wander. What exactly is a Squiggy?</span></div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><span style="color: red;">AUDIO AND VIDEO</span></strong><br />
<span style="color: red;">Look at that cover! This VHS tape is a brick. I could slap someone with it and knock them loopy. It looks and sounds as good as the day it rolled off the assembly line. (Hundreds of copies!) And, of course, constant comedic arousal is stimulated by the off-kilter sounds of the laugh track.</span></div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><span style="color: red;">EXTRAS</span></strong><br />
<span style="color: red;">Nothing. But, the video box is one big ad for “The World of VHS”! So, that’s pretty salty.</span></div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><span style="color: red;">FINAL THOUGHTS</span></strong><br />
<span style="color: red;">Once a year, I watch this movie and have a good time. It is a Classic 70s softcore film, in its own way. The odd layout of the film mixed with the strange set-up combined with some lovely nudity make me say “I saw naked bodies on my TV. Hey…”</span></div>
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<span style="color: red;">And then, a crowd of people I can’t see laugh uproariously. We sank back in our chairs exhausted.</span></div>
<span style="color: red;">07/08/10</span>Daniel B?http://www.blogger.com/profile/15523815647063071939noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5016594272815403008.post-57827791493668642802019-01-26T18:36:00.001-08:002019-01-26T18:36:34.022-08:00THE FORCE ON THUNDER MOUNTAIN<span style="font-size: x-small;"></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white;">Directed by Peter B. Good</span><br />
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><span style="background-color: white;">THE FILM</span></strong><br />
<span style="background-color: white;">“The kids will love this one…a colorful blend of wildlife film and science fiction thriller.” says the back of my United Home Video VHS box. I’d say it’s skewed more towards wildlife film. And, I’d say the kids might just be able to stay awake during it. I had trouble myself and, perversely, that just made me watch it a second time. <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><a href="http://bleedingskull.com/?p=3151" style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; color: black; font-size: 13px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; text-decoration: underline;" title="Jimmy, The Boy Wonder (1966)">Jimmy The Boy Wonder</a></em> has not been overthrown as my favorite kids movie because this one is in a special place to the left of things.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white;">“Father and son embark on a camping trip in the wilderness near mysterious Thunder Mountain.” The son’s name is Rick. I forgot the father’s name. Apparently, so did the person writing the copy on the back of the VHS.* Dad gets a lot of voiceover. He works too hard. His son doesn’t want to go on the trip. Father is hoping this trip will bring them closer together. At one point, Dad’s voiceover breaks into a song about going on a trip to Thunder Mountain with his son. I loved it.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white;">“Old Indian legends tell of strange lights emanating from the top of the mountain, and all manner of peculiar occurrences are said to take place there.” 1,000 years ago the legends began. There is a prologue set in 1888. A couple of miners get chased off of the mountain after getting showered with rocks and saying “Bullfeathers!” It takes Father and Rick (maybe “Father” is his name, Father Jones, Actuary?) several days to hike to the mountain so it’s not something folks can wander onto by accident. I’m imagining quite a few Sasquatch also have legends about this mountain, too.**</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white;">“As the boy and his dad approach the mountain, strange things begin to happen.” I don’t think they’re referring to all the wildlife stock footage but they could be. Remember how all the old review books used to comment on how much stock footage <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">The Prey</em> had in it? Well, <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Force</em> bests it, big time. In fact, there are wonderful moments when the film seems to be just about a father and son wandering through the woods looking at nature. And then, the director (Peter B. Good) remembers that this is supposed to have a narrative and the “strange things begin to happen”.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white;">“Powerful gusts of wind come from nowhere and destroy their camp. Later, the two are nearly crushed by a falling tree.” All true. It also sends the words “Go Back!” along the wind. This force actually teleports them into the middle of a desert at one point. It means business. But, very casually, the father and son continue moving towards Thunder Mountain (DA-DAAAA!!!!!).***</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white;">“They feel that they are being watched when there apparently is no one around.” Rick feels like he’s being watched. Father keeps shrugging it all off. Until, he vanishes into the desert and almost can’t get back. “Separated from his father, the boy comes across Om, a bearded old man who claims to have lived a thousand years on Thunder Mountain.” He says he is from the planet Ariana. He’s been living on the mountain and sleeping under a big rock, waiting for someone to take him home. He has engineered all of the incidents with his “Thought Translator”. It looks like a UFO-shaped rock. When Om thinks something, it immediately happens. He says that he is using “The Force”. What is the secret of this mysterious place?</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white;">“What is the secret of this mysterious place?” Hey! The copywriter and I are on the same page.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white;">“To an innocent youngster with no malice in his heart, Om reveals all in this colorful blend of wildlife…etc…” Om doesn’t reveal much. He hands Rick the “Thought Translator”. During a bear attack, Rick uses it. Om says “Fusion is Complete” and lets Rick keep the “Thought Translator”. Then, Om leaves (I think) in a flying saucer. Rick is reunited with Father and their dog and they leave and I still couldn’t quite figure out the point of all of it.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white;">But, the wildlife footage is wonderful. I learned more about beavers here than anywhere else. It’s such beautiful country that they’re in. Nothing can get in the way of that. Not even the “Adventure”, which is so low-key it’s amazing. To appropriate a review cliché, it seems to have been made by nature filmmakers who had heard about <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Star Wars</em> and wanted to incorporate all that “Sci-Fi” that the kids love into their movie. And, it’s fascinating. But, it can make you sleepy.</span></div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><span style="background-color: white;">AUDIO AND VIDEO</span></strong><br />
<span style="background-color: white;">The audio is fine. The quality of the print is rather washed out and cheap-looking. It looks like one of those 70s Nature/ Bigfoot documentaries that were made by Sunn Classics. Do I need to say that I think it looks awesome?</span></div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><span style="background-color: white;">EXTRAS</span></strong><br />
<span style="background-color: white;">For <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">The Force On Thunder Mountain</em>? The VHS? Keep reading, Chester…</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white;">I liked it. But, I can’t figure out who the heck it would have been made for. After about 15 minutes, I could see kids wandering around the theater, bored silly. And, after 20 minutes, my wife was telling me to turn it off. The curiosity factor drove me along. Why was this made? Who was it made for? Why is there no screenwriter credited? Why, why, why? American National Enterprises “presented” the film. The only other film I have from them is <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Didn’t You Hear</em>. Now there’s a film to review. Maybe next time.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white;">*Hey! I stand corrected. The credits list him as “Father”. “I don’t want the people to know the Father’s name.” “But, isn’t…” “No! They must not know…They must never know.”</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white;">**And, in Bigfoot Video stores, <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">The Flord On Blunder Moundland</em> is a big renter. The Land of the Sasquatch never went DVD. They have no use for the “Commentary”. They regard Hi-Def as foolishness, especially during the Windy Season. (October.)</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white;">***Every time we see the mountain, regardless of what’s occurring in the narrative, there is an enormous musical sting.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white;">****Their logo is accompanied by a shot of an eagle. That shot, at least I think it’s the same shot, appears as stock footage in the film.</span></div>
<span style="background-color: white;">03/11/10</span>Daniel B?http://www.blogger.com/profile/15523815647063071939noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5016594272815403008.post-21012124621046236662018-12-26T20:29:00.000-08:002018-12-26T20:29:22.676-08:00DESPERATION RISING<div style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; background-color: transparent; border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; color: black; font-family: &quot; font-size: 13px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; line-height: 19.5px; margin-bottom: 13px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; orphans: 2; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; text-align: left; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
Directed by Jason Holt<br />
Legacy Home Video VHS</div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">THE FILM</strong><br />
There’s a possibility that <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><a href="http://www.bleedingskull.com/vhs/frozenscream.html" style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; color: black; font-size: 13px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; text-decoration: underline;">Executioner Part II</a></em> has a new Double Feature mate. It’s time to find my copy of <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Nomad Riders</em> and pair that with <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Frozen Scream</em>. “All The Way! All The Way! All The Way!” The madness of Jason Holt’s <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Desperation Rising</em> has charmed me. The drug addicts, the prostitutes, the people at the awesome seminar (watch and enjoy!), the shoot-outs and punch-ups…</div>
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…it’s not really an action film…I thought it was going to be…</div>
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…bits of action do break out and it feels like it should be an action film but most of the time it’s strangely dubbed people doing things that are odd…</div>
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…but glorious……it does fit the mold of <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Executioner Part II</em>. Sort of a world where everyone is terrible to everyone else. And, everyone is just out to take advantage of anyone to make some cash or survive. <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Executioner Part II</em> ends on a bleaker note. <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Desperation Rising</em> gives its folks freedom on the rocks. Maybe it’s a biblical thing? Maybe it’s a Big Rock thing? I don’t know.</div>
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People argue and swear. Music plays so loud that it’s tough to hear the arguing and swearing. Video captions give us info that doesn’t quite make sense and throws in the exact times, just to keep us on our toes. There is a creepy Red Room. There is a series of odd haircuts. There is some space-age editing and, at the seminar, an African American gentleman says “The black man be coming up in the world.” I had thought Amos & Andy went off the air around 1960. Maybe this is Andy’s son?</div>
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A bunch of bad guys deal drugs and keep women in The Red Room for prostitution. Other guys and gals go to a seminar of some sort. Other people hang around and appear and disappear. And, I’m never quite sure where I am and then it ends.</div>
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The movie is a smear. Things happen. They make no sense but possibly they’re all part of the strange, beautiful (and crowded) world that exists in Jason Holt’s mind…and what a place that must be…I don’t know what I’m watching. It’s a movie but it could be a miniseries. It’s a movie but I could just be loaded.</div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">AUDIO AND VIDEO</strong><br />
Smeary looking. The audio is so disconnected that I didn’t even know where I was supposed to be looking half the time. It’s great. Jason Holt’s vision and the way I think about the world are not so far apart. I had a fever a few weekends ago and everyone and everything I saw and felt replicated the groove of this movie. Fever Dream is such a perfect term for this movie…</div>
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….I don’t want to go the Red Room…</div>
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This movie is right up there with <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Samurai Cop</em>. It’s better than <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Kill Squad</em>. These are recommendations of the highest order.</div>
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I sure wish there were some.</div>
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I’ve watched it three times and, for some reason, it’s not sinking in. It’s a hazy series of disconnected scenes. I do know, however, that you need to find a copy and you need to watch it. Immediately…any deficiencies in this review are my own.</div>
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Possibly one of the pinnacles of Loopy Filmmaking. Drugs, thugs, prostitutes, rocks, running around, kung fu and insanity…it all means something…I just don’t know what. I’ll watch it ten more times and get back to you.</div>
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I had to have two sets of Final Thoughts because I have no “Final” Thoughts about this movie. All thoughts are still appearing. Making their feelings felt in their own special “Jason Holt Is Everywhere” way.</div>
07/22/10Daniel B?http://www.blogger.com/profile/15523815647063071939noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5016594272815403008.post-81885918833169138952018-12-21T11:16:00.002-08:002018-12-24T12:26:52.900-08:00R.O.T.O.R.<h1 style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; background-color: transparent; border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; color: black; font-family: &quot; font-size: 24px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; orphans: 2; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; text-align: left; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
Directed by Cullen Blaine</h1>
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<span style="color: white;">Imperial Entertainment Corp. VHS</span></div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><span style="color: white;">THE FILM</span></strong><br />
<span style="color: white;">When you’re awkward, you can be afraid to even open your mouth. Your brain seems wired wrong. You can hear what people are saying but your responses to them seem to materialize from a different world. Just saying “Hello!” to someone you like or who you want to be your friend can be grueling. You work up the courage, step up and after two stumbling words you’re thinking, “Damn, I should have just sat quietly.” People say there are no stupid questions but there are plenty of stupid statements. And, the supply of stupid, incoherent statements an awkward person can make is endless.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">You do, truly, need to learn to be yourself. You’re no longer awkward when you do that. And, when you are just being you, it is the most natural thing in the world. People who are going to like you can see you as you are and they will want to be your friends. Life is a breeze. But, it ain’t easy, Jack. Some people are awkward for what seems like a very few moments. Some people are awkward for a couple of years. Some people are awkward their whole lives (Hello, <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Stargate</em> fans!) You shouldn’t penalize someone for trying and failing. Kids want to be like the “cool kids.” I know I did.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">And, I know <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">R.O.T.O.R.</em> does. As awkward as you may have been as a youngster (or now), <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">R.O.T.O.R.</em> is ten times more awkward. Everything about it says “Hello Suzie! Would you go to the Winter Formal with me?” but halfway through its voice cracks and then it has to suppress a belch. Like the fat kid who just wants friends or the acne-covered kid who you can’t stop staring at, <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">R.O.T.O.R.</em> just wants to be loved.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;"><em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Robocop</em> was big, flashy and popular. It had a lot of friends. After a few years, it would have an extended family. Why wouldn’t a group of filmmakers and folks in Texas want to bring themselves into your video store under the guise of “robot cop-style cool?” I know I would. But, everyone involved with this film seems a little embarrassed.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">(Except Dr. Steele. More about her later.)</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">R.O.T.O.R. is a prototype robotic cop that gets loose and goes renegade one Thursday night. It is up to Dr. Coldyron, Dr. Steele and a woman named Sony (pronounced Sonya) to bring him down before he carries out his mission and (eventually) kills everyone, everywhere in the sweet, sweet world. But, the film just cannot stop fumbling. The acting, the dialog, the action scenes, the effects, the plotting, the music, the songs (“Hideaway,” a hot romantic duet) — their voices keep cracking and they keep raising their arms, showing off the sweat stains. My God, though, they are trying their hardest.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">Maybe too hard. There was a period in eighth grade when I wore Hawaiian shirts and jams because all the other guys wore them. I could dress like them but I goofed up all on my own. During scenes where tension is supposed to be high, they layer on the music, which only ends up drawing attention to itself and how un-tense events on screen are. There’s a scene where a government guy (Buglar) is telling Dr. Coldyron about the R.O.T.O.R. project falling apart and all of them going to jail. The scene goes on and on and this tense music plays. But, it only makes the whole thing sillier. The government guy even opens a Coke and pours it in a glass awkwardly.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">The thing about it is — if you’re cool, you’re cool. Even if you do something goofy, it can be spun-off as cool or easily forgotten. It takes a lot to lose the “cool.” Same with awkward. Once you do an awkward thing, it takes one cool thing to make you neutral again. Each goofy thing you do expands your reputation exponentially. You will always be tainted with “dork” until it is fully shed and that may never happen. <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">R.O.T.O.R.</em> certainly doesn’t do it.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">Some folks are dubbed, some speak live. But, almost every line spoken is awkward. It could have been translated from Russian to English by a non-English and non-Russian speaking Guatemalan. There is a meeting of scientists that consists of the most hilariously odd lines of dialog ever. Really. At first they just seem strange, but, boy they build. Not a single line sounds natural or makes any sense. The folks sitting around the table delivering them only add to the ambiance. It is legitimately hysterical.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">Now, one guy I know who has seen this movie thinks that the things I’ve said here means that this film is junk and not worth your time. I like to think we make friends with the fat kid here at Bleeding Skull. We welcome in everyone and make a place for them. Some folks, granted, just don’t want to play and that’s fine. Go with God. But, <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">R.O.T.O.R.</em>, Sweet <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">R.O.T.O.R.</em>, is one for the whole family (figuratively speaking).</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">It wants to be an exciting action film with a touch of comedy so badly that you watch and giggle but definitely enjoy. I think that’s enough.</span><br />
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<span style="color: white;">Go out today and make a new friend — with <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">R.O.T.O.R.</em></span></div>
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<span style="color: white;"> The <a href="https://www.shoutfactory.com/product/millennium-r-o-t-o-r-double-feature?product_id=4492" target="_blank">Scream Factory</a> Blu-Ray is delightful. Plus, it's a longer cut! Plus, Steele in HD! Plus,<i> Millennium.</i> </span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">My Extras: A Letter to Dr. Steele</span><br />
<span style="color: white;">(Mr. Skull has been kind enough to place a photo of Dr. Steele nearby.)</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">Dr. Steele,</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">Will you be my friend? I don’t want to push. Who knows where this could go? I know: You are huge. You could pick me up and toss me across the room. And, frankly, I would love every minute of it. Your skunk mullet would draw attention to us at restaurants and people would say “Who are they who believe they can flaunt societal decorum?” and I would tell them to “Cram it!” because you and I should be friends. Good friends. I’m making you a mix tape, downloading it to my MP3 player and sending it, online, to your heart. Call me?</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">– Dan “Bleeding Skull’s Friend”</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">More awkward than a greased melon on top of a conical soup tureen, <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">R.O.T.O.R.</em> is, nevertheless, pure joy. This one may be obscure but it sure ain’t tough to find. Find it, watch it and enjoy. If you know Dr. Steele, send her my best.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">“We’ve got to find our hideaway!” We will.</span></div>
<span style="color: white;">11/22/06</span>Daniel B?http://www.blogger.com/profile/15523815647063071939noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5016594272815403008.post-66431722164676967432018-12-21T11:15:00.003-08:002018-12-21T11:15:45.931-08:00VIDEO STORE MEMORIES<div style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px rgb(0, 0, 0); font: 400 13px/19.5px "quot"; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0px 0px 13px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: left; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="color: white;">Aren’t DVDs and Blu-Rays great? I mean, come on. They look great, sound great and have all those great extras on them. And, what about that internet? Have you been on that? Isn’t that something? All the things you could ever want and just that little bit extra. Convenient, expansive and loaded. Why on earth would someone who is currently using the internet spend any of his time writing about old video stores? Why not write an article called “My First Six Months on Netflix” or “I Just Download It Now!”? Seems more productive. Well, Halloween is a holiday. Holidays are for fun. One of the places holidays acquire their fun from is through the concept of “accumulated nostalgia” and –</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">Good Lord, do you folks know the guy in the last paragraph? Friend of yours? What was he talking about? The purpose of writing this article is to spark the memory. Many of you reading this have been to some really great video stores in your lives. We hunt, collect and accumulate so many of these strange movies. Now, the internet can make the search much easier. But, I’m here to send out just a whiff of remembrance your way. To take you back inside those great movie shelters of our youth (or not youth). I’m going to sort of ramble through the great video stores I remember frequenting at one time or another. There was much more structure to this article when I first wrote it but why? The video store journeys I took weren’t structured, they were fun and exciting. So, put your good pants on, grab your membership cards and let’s travel.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">There were two ways I remember acquiring movies (Beta) in the first half of the 80s. One was mysterious and exciting and completely above board. One was a bit on the sleazy side. Both of them were kind of erratic. We’d never know what we were going to end up with. All part of the experience, however.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">’ll start with the sleazy. Although it was the first place I remember getting movies from, it wasn’t technically a video store. It was a place I like to call: Jack’s House. Or maybe his name was Steve or Ted. I think Jack suits him just fine. Maybe he’d welcome me calling him Jack, wherever he is now. I don’t know. But, Jack was a guy that my step-dad Frank (I’ll call him Pop) knew. Jack would provide us with the newest releases several times a month. <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Sudden Impact</em>, <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">National Lampoon’s Vacation</em>, <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Christine</em>, <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">The Dead Zone</em>, <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">The Bitch</em>…you name it, Jack got it for us. The problem with Jack was the Movie Pick-Up Procedure.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">He was a divorced gentleman with a son named Jack Jr. I always seemed to be the one who went along with Pop to pick up these things. Jack would welcome us into his house and say “Jack Jr., show Dan your new whatever-the-hell-you-kids-play-with-now.” The awkward thing was that Jack Jr. was two years younger than me. I was around eleven at the time and, for kids, this is a hell of a gap. And, I used to read a lot and write. Jack Jr. did nothing but watch TV. I remember sitting silently for long periods of time. It wasn’t fun.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">Meanwhile, Pop and Jack would sort through the latest batch of movies. Jack had made copies of them from somewhere-or-other. We’d generally walk away from there with two good ones. The general sleaziness of Jack’s place, however, was nothing I could articulate but it was palpable. He’d get too close to me when we talked. He had dozens of Playboys stacked in a cabinet in the bathroom. His shorts were too short. You know him now. One of those guys. I never liked it but, as I was the oldest, I always seemed to be the one to go along.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">The end of our time with Jack happened quickly and was a sweet relief. One day, we went over there for <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Krull</em>. I was anxious to see <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Krull</em> (what kid wasn’t?) and was very willing to make the visit this time. It was summer; it was hot. Jack and Son were in bathing suits with towels draped around their necks. My Pop, being a genial sort of fellow, accepted their offer of stepping into the backyard.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">“Come on in, Frank and Dan! The water’s fine!” Jack was gesticulating wildly for us to join him. Jack Jr. was waving too. In my mind, anything that these two endorsed so heartily must be creepy.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">I was not proven wrong.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">“No thanks, Jack! We’ll just get <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Krull</em> and go,” my Pop said. “Anyways, we didn’t bring our suits!”</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">“Suits?!”</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">In one quick movement that has slowed to a crawl in my mind, Jack and Son dropped their trunks, smiled and dove in the water, in full regalia, enjoying the fresh air.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">“We’re gonna take off!” Pop could move fast when required. We were in the car in seconds.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">“Holy God, Danny! Let’s never go there again.”</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">I never did.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">The mysterious way of renting I mentioned involved the earliest sort of Mom-and-Pop video store. After a time, chains began popping up and things become slightly more systematic. But, around 1984 or so, every enterprising person seemed to be opening up a store offering all the videos they could. “Retail Price: $79.95″ “Have you been to one of these places? You put down a deposit of $50 and you get a tape for $3 a night. You can bring a movie home!” These stores were usually in little strip mall areas and attempted to encompass the whole of creation. “Video Universe”, “Video Galaxy”, “Video Dimension”. The employees were generally one person. I remember more moms than pops in these stores. They would rent to you but always seemed a touch wary and more than a little surly. <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Microwave Massacre</em> is not a diamond necklace but at 80 bucks it sure must have felt like it to these folks. So, I remember occasionally feeling uncomfortable in these places. You’d get the “Stink Eye” a lot.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">All of this flew by the wayside when you were in the aisles. Shelf after shelf of wonder. Some funny, some action-packed, some scary, some sleazy and some as unknown as The Unknown Comic (before we found out who he was). The big boxes would leer at us. Since most of the films weren’t first run or well-known at all, it was box art that sold it. In fact, the only spot of the video store that sold itself was in the closet-like area in the corner. Usually covered with a curtain or blanket or whatever they could find in an old trunk from the attic. I remember one that used a shower curtain and one in Canandaigua, NY that had a curtain with toy boats on it. “Our good one tore yesterday!” “Did that one have He-Man on it?” “If you’d like to be asked to leave the store, you’re talking to the right guy!”</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">Because I was absolutely terrified of horror films that were in any way modern, I could only look at the box art. My Uncle Mike and a girl in my class, Pam Adamski, would give me all the details on the latest slashers. But, I could only stare at the boxes. I was too frightened. The big boxes didn’t help with the fear of the dark thing but I couldn’t stop looking.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">What in the name of the Bright & Shiny One could be in that basket on the <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Basket Case</em> box? I stared at that box for quite some time. I was at the Drug Carnival (?) in Irondequoit, NY around 1984-5. It was in that spot where the Walmart now stands. Off the 104. You know the spot. The Drug Carnival shared the plaza with some sort of department store, possibly Two Guy’s. They had mostly drug store stuff but there were videos in the corner. And, we occasionally rented from there. But, not <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Basket Case</em>. That would be later on. The gruesome pictures on the back gave me the Screaming Strawberries so I wasn’t even considering that. (Although, if it gave me nightmares, isn’t that sort of like getting the movie for free?) Then, I saw the box for <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Blood Feast</em>.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">“Ma, can we rent this one?”</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">“My God, no! You’ll have nightmares.”</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">“The lady has no tongue.”</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">The actual movie poster is cool but it doesn’t beat that huge close-up off the de-tongued woman. What is this movie about? <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Blood Feast</em>! What a title! It’s unrated! What does a film do to be unrated? My mind boggled.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">This was one of the first places that gave us a “List”. The stapled together series of papers that listed the movie titles, genre and rating. All very orderly. Pop would call the kids round the kitchen table and say “What movie do you kids want? Pick two in case the one you want is out.” I’d sit with my sister and, sometimes, my step brother and we’d peruse. So many choices. It was always more fun to look around inside the store but we didn’t always get to go so you tried to make a good choice. At this time, I was renting Zucker brothers’ movies (or similar stuff like <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Ricky</em>), Benny Hill show tapes or Mel Brooks’s comedies.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">As long as there was no visible T&A in the area, they’d rent it for me. I remember being so disappointed at <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Transylvania 6-5000</em>. So unfunny. And, I thought this when I was a dumb kid. That was a really big “New Release” I was after for some time. Man, I had to watch <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Kentucky Fried Movie</em> twice to cheer myself up. At that point, my parent’s sex rule became something I could get around for the next few years of renting. We picked up KFM that night with no problem from the parents. “It’s made by the guys who did <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Airplane</em>!” And, it’s loaded with boobs! Goodness. I sat there with my eyes wide open and my jaw dropping. I realized that as long as there was no T&A implied I could rent anything. That meant two things: 1) I could come across boobs and such with a little subterfuge and 2) I could rent almost any horror film I wanted.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">The implications were startling. But first, I had to get over my complete terror of anything horror related.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">It was a little later (86′-’87) that my sister and my Pop began watching horror films together. Well, <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">A Nightmare on Elm Stree</em>t at least. We used to go to Shows-To-Go right up the street. An actual huge-ass video store with everything. They would hang out in horror and I would be in comedy. I bought a copy of <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Top Secret</em> on Beta for $4.99. Awesome! The store had its cash register in a round in the center of the store. All videos were surrounding it on the walls. Occasional shelving units were spread about. Hours spent scanning up and down walls looking for the right one. And then, hours spent scanning horror and wondering.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">It wasn’t until my freshman year of high school in ’87-’88 that I got over it and the mania began. Eric Zydel leant me a copy of <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Friday the 13th Part VI: Jason Lives</em>. Now, granted, there’s no gore in the theatrical version but the night I sat in our family room and watched that film was a revelation. The movie kept me on the edge of my seat but I watched it. And that night, I slept well. <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Evil Dead</em> 1 & 2 followed. I was primed and ready to go. The only problem was that Shows-To-Go had recently closed down. A new store that, frankly, catered too much to the family for my tastes opened up next door: Blockbuster. These family leanings were rather restrictive. I was only 14.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">So, I found somewhere else to go.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">Wegman’s Supermarkets. Great places. I used to work in their parking lot, pushing shopping carts, for a while. (“I’ve called this meeting for all the Parking Lot guys to discuss safety. Bob got hit by a car again.” Bob got hit by a car a lot. You’d see him pushing a cart, a car would pass to close and he’d drop. A moment, later, he’d be back up. Solid fellow.) Epic stores with…wait for it…video sections. Last time I went to Wegman’s Video was December 2004. No fun. Everything you’d expect. If there was something there that you didn’t know about, as with most DVD release, it was because you weren’t paying attention. At the end of the 80s, however, Wegman’s was caught in the middle of the Trash Flood. I’d pick 2 or 3 every week and still have so many I had to get to next time. (I once contemplated alphabetical renting but that always fell apart quickly.) My Ma would make a disapproving noise (“<em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Dr. Butcher, M.D.</em>? What is this about?”) and rent them. Pop loved them so he didn’t have a problem. These were mostly VHS by this time so I’d copy them over to Beta for easier viewing. (We were a Beta family until the last possible moment.) Every week my Ma went to Wegman’s and, until I could rent on my own, I would go too. With a list.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">Back then, it was gore. Now, it’s strangeness. Funny how your tastes mature.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">Eric Zydel was the gentleman who introduced me to the Old Church Mall Video store. We spent many hours, circa 1987-1991, enjoying some of the sleaziest and stupidest films you could ever want to see. We were always looking for new and exciting places were we could browse round and find new and crazy trash. He drove us there in his big truck, which was always on “E”. “I’ve got to put gas in the car. How much change do you have?” “75 cents.” “All right. I have 45. We’ll do that.” Anyway…</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">The Old Church Mall Video store was in a mall and the mall was in a church. Well, it was a church. Now it was a mall. The whole shebang was in downtown Webster, NY. It had been a church that they put a couple of floors in and opened up as a little mall. Local merchants, knickknacks, bootleg CDs and, on the top floor a majestic video store. If you think about a church real quick, you can imagine what it looked like. This was a big, rafter-filled, almost-Gothic church. You went up, up a wooden staircase. When the walls were suddenly covered with movie posters, you were almost there. A few more steps. Then, you entered the worship place. There were huge wooden rafters stretching all over. A lot of space. The two side nooks where the confessional booths and side pews would have been (down below) shelved sci-fi and documentaries. Horror films stretched all the way up the back wall. Almost to the rafters. The Church of the Video was open for business. (Pretentious or portentous? You tell me. I’ve been writing too long to know.)</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">A lady with glasses and an attitude ran the whole shebang. Her name was Mrs. Barnaby. (I don’t know for certain but that’s what I’ll call her.) She was very nice to the fellows who rented porn. But, she was always snippy whenever I approached her.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">“Hello. These two please.”</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">“<em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Zombie</em>? <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Bloodeaters</em>? Why do you want to rent these?”</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">“I like horror movies.”</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">“I don’t.”</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">A gentleman would lean in, talking loud. “Hey! Have you got <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Three Nude Sisters and Their Hot Gramma III</em>? Or <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Horny Old Men</em>?”</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">“We have both. Would you like me to see if the first two Hot Grammas are in stock?”</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">“Sure.”</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">“Ummm…Could I get these two movies, please? I was here first.”</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">“Look at the movies this kid is renting, Rod!”</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">“Kid, why do you want to watch those?…Oh, Mrs. B, when you’re back there, could you see if <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Grampa’s Got A Boner</em> is in stock!?”</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">“That’s a good one!”</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">The horror section was formidable. The films rented so stores stocked them. The larger the video box, the higher up the wall it went. What is that up there with the jack-in-the-box? <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Blood Fury</em>? No. <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Blood Frenzy</em>. Awesome. They’ve got <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Blood Feast</em> and <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Two Thousand Maniacs!</em> We’ll get a pizza, throw some logs in the fireplace and enjoy. With great strain, I’d get the boxes off of the wall. “Ahhh!! Just give me the number! The number!” I’d turn and see Mrs. Barnaby pointing at a copy of <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">The Goonies</em>. She wasn’t lying. There was a small white sticker with a number scrawled on it on the front of each box. So, I strained the boxes back onto the wall, memorized the numbers and got handed copies of <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Sex with a Smile</em> and <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Ride in A Pink Car</em>.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">“I think I got the wrong numbers.”</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">“Marty Feldman’s in this one.”</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">“I wanted <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">The Prey</em>.”</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">“I should have known.”</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">In the winter time, sitting before the fire, with this weird, weird trash was the best. It still is. Without the joy of the hunt though, it wouldn’t have been the same. The Old Church mall might, possibly, be my favorite of all the stores. Just the feel of the place. Even Mrs. Barnaby’s complaining didn’t blunt anything. Face out and startling, the horror section was a sloppy bath of sweat and joy. It also had that great musty smell that you really don’t get anymore. Blockbuster Videos are like Subway Sandwich shops. In a pinch, the sandwiches are OK but it’s all very antiseptic. Every once in a while you might get an awesome sandwich but they really aren’t built for that. It’s convenience and volume. Blockbuster is the same. They get you the new stuff. They get it for you now. But, that isn’t what the adventurous movie renter is after. I don’t want guarantees when I rent. I want things to be as lawless and as musky as the Old West. There had to be a corner of the store (documentaries, kids, softcore) that felt like no one had been there in years. I want to be able to rent <a href="http://bleedingskull.com/carnival-of-blood-1970/" style="border: 0px rgb(0, 0, 0); font-size: 13px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: underline;" title="Carnival Of Blood (1970)"><em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Carnival of Blood</em></a> or not, depending upon availability and human whim. The Old Church Mall was wonderful. Unfortunately, I found it too late. I was going away to college soon. The Church Mall would be visited on vacations only. And, because I had to work whenever I was home, there wouldn’t always be time to stop by. The memories are strong, though. I still have my green, laminated membership card somewhere.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">(A word in Blockbuster’s defense: I haven’t been in one for a while but, when they first opened up, they carried some decent horror films. There was a brief period where they seemed to be moving from “Largest Chain of Video Stores” to “Largest Chain of Videos Stores for the Whole Family”. <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Burial Ground</em>, <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Buried Alive</em>, <a href="http://bleedingskull.com/pigs-1972/" style="border: 0px rgb(0, 0, 0); font-size: 13px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: underline;" title="Pigs (1972)"><em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Pigs</em></a>, <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Microwave Massacre</em>, <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Boarding House</em> (for Heaven’s Sake). They used to have some good stuff but, apart from the rare exception, nothing that other places didn’t have.)</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">hall we go to Ithaca, NY for a while?</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">Ithaca is sort of in a valley between two large hills. My Alma Matter is on one: Ithaca College. My wife’s is on the other: Cornell. As you hit the bottom of the hill, there is a lovely town with plenty of good time video stores scattered about.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">The first place I discovered was Video Ithaca. Large and spacious with lots of corners. Sci-fi and horror were in a musky nook but the New Releases were in a spot with a great, big window. They seemed to specialize in more artistic stuff (I think folks call them “good movies”.) But, they had wonderful, wonderful trash. <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">The Wizard of Gore</em> was the first film I rented from there. That night, a bunch of us were renting Woody Allen films, John Ford, Alfred Hitchcock and, somehow, H.G. Lewis. How’d that happen? I couldn’t tell you. I did get some looks that night. “Why is there plastic sheeting under that woman? Is that so when her guts falls out she doesn’t ruin the floor of the restaurant? Or is this all part of the illusion?” In the end, folks enjoyed it. I am always surprised at how folks can profess to love the popular and the good but be perfectly willing to slog through the grime when given half a chance.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">Video Ithaca had a slightly sweet musky odor. They used to have a big, big rack of candy and two entrances. So there were extra smells and a cross-draft. Probably the nicest musky odor of all of them. It was the sort of smell that encouraged one to go that little bit further. I remember asking them when <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Black Belt Jones</em> was going to come back in stock. The big box was there but the movie never was. I was told it was damaged. So, I asked “How much for the box?” “We can’t sell you that.” When I pointed out that if they were getting another they’d get a new box with it, I was told to stuff it. When I pointed out that if it was permanently damaged what good was the box to them, I was told to cram it. The fun we had.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">One weekend, Kevin J. Jolly (the J stands for Jolly) and I took it in our heads to become more sophisticated movie viewers. So, we took to wearing bath robes over our clothes. We called them “smoking jackets”. We’d have in-depth “salons”, which were immediately enhanced by our generous, cosmopolitan attitudes. One fine afternoon, we decided to pick up some films. We drove into town and visited Video Ithaca with our smoking jackets on. Were there bon mots aplenty on this journey? You can bet your big, square ass there were. Oddly enough, no one who saw us mentioned the odd vestments we were in. We expected “Hey, what are you two doinks doing in your bath robes?” Maybe because it was a college town? I don’t know. I remember we rented <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Girls Nite Out</em> and <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Weekend</em>. Cosmopolitan conversations were afoot that night I can tell you.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">After a few semesters of nothing but Video Ithaca, I drove down the road a bit. I saw a sign with a little man wearing a crown and smiling. What’s that in his hand? A VHS tape! Oh yeah! He’s the Video King and this is his domain. Mondays and Tuesdays were 4 for 3 Day. You could rent 4 good ones for $3.25 and have them for three nights. What a selection! <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Twisted Nightmare</em>? You bet. <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Winterbeast</em>? Right here. <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Mark of the Devil</em>, you are my friend.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">Video King was a bit grimier than Video Ithaca but it was large and they always seemed to have strange new releases that we’d never heard of. (<em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Winterbeast</em>, T<em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">he Dead Next Door</em>) It was a big space that had a wall extending down the middle of it almost cutting it in half. Horror and sci-fi on one side; new releases and random odd stuff on the other. I never met the King but I imagine he is a happy man.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">The final Ithaca joint was, I believe, a Shows To Go. (I actually think that’s wrong but I can’t quite remember the name.) They had two locations. One was a block or two away from the King! The other was halfway up the hill near Cornell. Both were smallish, musty places. One of them had their horror section up against the back wall. The sci-fi section was in a shelving unit in front of it. You had to squeeze by the sci-fi to get to horror. If I remember correctly, when Ernest went back to School, there was a large pencil that jutted out of the cardboard display for the movie. It sat in the corner and it would goose you when you went into or out of Horror. You didn’t bring ladies.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">Real quick: This was the video store were I rented <a href="http://bleedingskull.com/dont-go-in-the-woods-remembering-cherry-dick-and-all-their-friends/" style="border: 0px rgb(0, 0, 0); font-size: 13px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: underline;" title="Don’t Go In The Woods: Remembering Cherry, Dick, And All Their Friends"><em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Don’t Go In The Woods</em></a> for the second time. I went to the counter, handed the lady the movie and smiled. A moment later, she stared at me, a little cross. “Where’d you get this?” “Horror.” “This isn’t one of ours.” “Sure it is.” “I don’t see it on the computer.” “Well, it’s one of yours.” “Oh, I see. Here it is. Congratulations. This film has been here for ten years and it’s never been rented. Enjoy.” I felt like a foster parent for wayward videos.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">All three of the video stores in Ithaca had great character and charm. You couldn’t beat a town where if you needed a movie you just traveled. One of them would have it. Of course, that’s not necessarily true but I always thought it might be. It certainly put my little “K” car through the ringer. Those hills got pretty steep and the car was always on the verge of collapse anyways.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">That makes me think… I love digital technology as much as the next guy. I like the proper aspect ratio and some neat extras. But, these stores with their skuzzy tapes and anonymous movies had so much character and they smelled so much neater. I would always go the extra mile to get something from one of these places. One winter, I hopped in the car and drove to the distant Shows To Go. You drove down the hill into town and then back up another hill with a two-lane highway road that had a grassy median that dipped in sharply. Normally, it was pretty safe but today a blizzard was coming down. Visibility was getting pretty bad. The roads were getting slippery. But, dammit, I needed to get some trashy films. They had <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Satan’s Blade</em> and <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">The Slayer</em> at this one. I had to go. You’ll be happy to know that I got the movies. The lady in the store was quite surprised that someone had come out. “I thought the police had advised folks to stay off the roads.” That’s no deterrent. The drive back, though, had one shaky moment that I’ll never forget.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">I was driving back down the hill towards town. The grassy median was now a white triangle shape dipping into the ground. White falling. White being churned up on the road ahead. It looked like the police warning had been ignored because the highway was packed with cars moving slowly but steadily. I was in the right lane, focusing on my driving and thinking “We’ll order pizza, watch movies and this’ll be great.” At that point, I turned and looked at the woman driving next to me. She was probably in her mid-40′s, bundled up warm. As I looked at her, she looked at me. Her face was kind of sad. I wondered why she looked like that. It’s a blizzard. We have these all the time out here. Then, her face started sliding away from me, leaving my line of sight. Her melancholy face never changing. I heard a horn beep and snapped out of it. She had rolled off the road into the median. I looked into my rearview mirror and saw her car at an awkward angle, still. I like to imagine she had the same look on her face. Oh, the dumb things I’d do to get these movies. You won’t find me doing something that crazy on EBay when an original VHS copy of <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Tales from The Quadead Zone</em> comes up for sale. Well, don’t hold me to that.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">After Ithaca, I moved to Los Angeles. The only video store I’ve found here that has the thrill in it (or had) was Super Duper Video in North Hollywood, CA. They’ve been a Hollywood Video since late-2003 but I still remember them fondly. When you walked in, it looked and smelled like a Blockbuster. But, then you’d start looking at the tapes. They had quite a few movies I’d never seen or found before. I began to loosen up here and start diving into sci-fi, action, softcore nonsense. All fun stuff. Eventually, I realized that the place did smell musky. It had just been a while since I’d encountered the smell. When they closed, I sighed audibly. The whole San Fernando Valley sighed with me.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">Eddie Brandt’s Saturday Matinee is great. They are in North Hollywood and have tons of VHS and DVD. Not everything but quite a large selection. Unfortunately, a lot of genres are mixed together so there is never that overwhelming horror/trash rush you’d get elsewhere. Movies are spine out because they have so many, so the visceral thrill of accidentally spotting something is gone. And, rentals can get a little pricey compared to the cheap Super Duper Video. All these things shouldn’t discourage you, however. I go there almost every weekend and find something exciting. It’s just the layout that doesn’t completely grab me. Searching here takes a bit more. But, you can find it.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">I don’t know. I think, at the end of the day, that the old-school video store was just more fun. All the gross and offensive box art was its proper context. It was being used to sell the movies. Now, it’s historical. Still great to look at but something is lost. I keep an eye on recent direct-to-DVD, low budget stuff and most of it looks so desperately uninteresting. Pictures on VHS boxes were usually hilarious and banal or overly gruesome. DVD pictures always make me think “Oh look, a Jeff Stryker-wannabe and Honey ‘Big Boobs’ McGee emoting like nobody’s business. Boring!” I can’t help thinking, though, that even these films might have some interest in the old time setting. We used to rent anything that Video King put out and, as I mentioned, they kept <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Nekromantik</em> and friends readily available. The modern day stuff just isn’t appealing and I think part of that is the setting.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">I mean, who was Mrs. Barnaby? Why was she surrounded by trash and porn all day long? In the winter, why did we never see her breath? And, what were these films about? Who made them? Were they all insane? You’re not going to think this in the Blockbuster where they offer you 400 copies of the latest release with Lindsay Lohan or Rob Schneider. And, although the old employees could be surly, they had some stake in the place themselves. Go to a Blockbuster or somewhere like Best Buy and all the employees are in their twenties or younger and could, sincerely, not give a crap. You always feel like they’ve got the wrong people in the movie sections. “Yeah, I’m normally in office supplies. I’m working movies today because Bob is out.” The people in the old video stores seemed to actually like movies. Maybe they didn’t like you but if they could answer your questions what did it matter? I’ve had employees at Best Buy stand right in front of a movie and tell me they don’t have it or they’ve never heard of it. That sucks.</span></div>
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<span style="color: white;">Maybe it’s impossible to describe the thrill of the old video stores. It’s like trying to describe the innocent romantic excitement of a roller skating party. You need to have been to one. Are there still musky-wonderful video stores out there? I believe so. But, they’re all selling their VHS stock. So, now is the time. Get out there. Maybe you’ll find something no one’s ever heard of. Good luck. Make me a copy.</span></div>
<span style="color: white;">October 1, 2006</span>Daniel B?http://www.blogger.com/profile/15523815647063071939noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5016594272815403008.post-62214402218414705552018-12-21T11:07:00.001-08:002018-12-21T11:17:56.923-08:00BLACKENSTEIN <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4nmN41AQSUGynZkS_zBlyVHRrRf4YLcjT-e0z1-eIsnhxexJIPRD-yhGtVKOYVbmSt_YPNaH8ul5h3Exgl9TSr44gyt43-rgrCqkJog7sg3wrX7lE517hEDV6BTFw6O0UV1ndwuYafSMk/s1600/Blackenstein%2521.JPEG.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="900" data-original-width="1600" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4nmN41AQSUGynZkS_zBlyVHRrRf4YLcjT-e0z1-eIsnhxexJIPRD-yhGtVKOYVbmSt_YPNaH8ul5h3Exgl9TSr44gyt43-rgrCqkJog7sg3wrX7lE517hEDV6BTFw6O0UV1ndwuYafSMk/s320/Blackenstein%2521.JPEG.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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Directed by William A. Levey<br />
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<span style="background-color: black; color: white;">Media Home Entertainment VHS</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: black; color: white;">If I ever lost my arms and legs…And, if I had a girlfriend who was a loving physicist named Winifred…And, if that girlfriend knew a Dr. Stein who could prepare bottles filled with yellow liquid containing “DNA Formula”…And, if Dr. Stein said he could put new arms and legs on me…And, if the side effect was that I would go out at night with a big, square head and start killing people…And, if I could spend five minutes with the comedy stylings of Andy “C”…<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">*</strong> If all these things came together and someone hired William A. Levey to direct it all…</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: #eeeeee;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="color: white;"><span style="background-color: black;">Then, yes, I would be the happiest man in the universe because I would be — <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Blackenstein</em>.<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">**</strong></span></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: black; color: white;">A world where everything is confusion and nothing seems to make sense. A dark, disjointed place where people have dinner at long, dark tables surrounded by pitch-blackness in the middle of the afternoon. A place where a large-breasted woman is always right around the corner just in time for a monster. (Such a wonderful place.) “Why does the man you experimented on and gave new limbs to periodically turn into a fellow who looks a lot like the Frankenstein Monster?” No one asks it. Why would they? No one retains much memory from scene to scene.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: black; color: white;">A New World is envisioned with every passing moment!</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: black; color: white;">This is not a particularly nice world in the average human sense. It’s dark and grotty. A lot of people being ripped open. A lot of dirty jokes. A lot of people being unpleasant to one another. But, Blackenstein always looks like he’s having a good time. He is “connected to his work” in the best possible way. A man likes to know he has accomplished something at the end of the day (night). Blackenstein knows he has. He has the entrails to prove it. And, they made a movie about him. Can you say the same about you?</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: black; color: white;">I thought not. Connect with your job more, why don’t ya?</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: black; color: white;">Eddie, Dr. Stein, Winifred, Malcomb, Andy “C”, that woman who looks like my Aunt Mary, Topless Sally, Girl in Dune Buggy, Bruno, the hospital attendant with the chip on his shoulder, the three guys at the club who could be pimps but might not be, Steve. Don’t you want to know these people? <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Blackenstein</em> holds out its damaged but loving hand and says, “Join us! We’re not just a horror picture, not just blaxploitation. We’re something greasier. More alive and more boring, often at the same time. It’s a dark world but there is love and where there isn’t love there’s an old lady who wants to stay young and a laboratory straight out of the corner of some warehouse. Why not travel with us and learn? We’re like life. You never know what crap is going to hit you in the face next.”</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: black; color: white;">A picture of the monster can carry you into the film but it requires some stamina to make it through. If you do, however, director William Levey has promised me that he will thank each person, individually, with a hunk of 5-year-old summer sausage he recently found out back in the shed behind the trampoline that his kids used to use but now just kind of sits there rusting. He believes the stock of summer sausage was meant to be a gift of some kind that was forgotten when they had Great-Grandma Fannie staying with them after she had her hips removed and accidentally replaced with artificial shoulders. Funny, but not practical for walking. (Of course, a neighbor could have been hoarding the sausage back there against Mr. Levey’s wishes.)</span></div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><span style="background-color: black; color: white;">AUDIO AND VIDEO</span></strong><br />
<span style="background-color: black; color: white;">Succulent & Sumptuous, respectively. Media always comes through with the Greasy. I know this is on DVD but why, Good Lord, why?</span></div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><span style="background-color: black; color: white;">EXTRAS</span></strong><br />
<span style="background-color: black; color: white;">You think you’re going on a Carnival Cruise? You’re watching a film called <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Blackenstein</em>. Expect nothing and enjoy.</span></div>
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<strong style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-weight: 700; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><span style="background-color: black; color: white;">FINAL THOUGHTS</span></strong><br />
<span style="background-color: black; color: white;">If everything I’ve said is not incentive enough for spending an evening with everyone’s favorite black Frankenstein Monster, let me quote the Cardella Di Milo’s theme song: “Sometimes I drink! Sometimes I cry!” Amen. Sometimes I do them at the same time. And, sometimes it’s great. Thank you, <em style="border-bottom-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-image-outset: 0; border-image-repeat: stretch; border-image-slice: 100%; border-image-source: none; border-image-width: 1; border-left-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: invert; outline-style: none; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Blackenstein</em>.</span></div>
Daniel B?http://www.blogger.com/profile/15523815647063071939noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5016594272815403008.post-27453293180842771572018-12-04T17:32:00.001-08:002019-11-21T10:42:14.853-08:00BJ and the Bear Series Recap<i>BJ and the Bear</i> was the perfect mélange of pop culture elements that the end of the 1970s were offering us. (Whether they were the best elements or not is your call.) Good looking truckers with chimps listening to soft rock (and sometimes disco) travelling the country helping people out, romancing pretty ladies and fighting (mostly) crooked law enforcement. The initial TV movie<i> <a href="http://polishamericanguyreviews.blogspot.com/2015/02/bj-and-bear-foundlings.html" target="_blank">The Foundlings</a></i> is very well done. Possibly one of the absolute best things that Glen A. Larson was ever involved in. Then, there was the series. 3 seasons of BJ McKay and his best friend Bear. My individual reviews cover pretty much everything I had to say. I just wanted to do a final recap before we put the boys to bed.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiOnyp94uCI3sBUlVeOCYczorhsJqvwbP8XQuDPBuZoDd8GU4u5bQOP083qnbmLVY7_KVLuzWgVijmXd2exyMw22Kku0leLP-B-TdmMZ3UyABujgByj7OvwsaEeTI1u1-Y7gIQ6RSQtsQrG/s1600/vlcsnap-2018-12-04-16h45m38s238.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="480" data-original-width="640" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiOnyp94uCI3sBUlVeOCYczorhsJqvwbP8XQuDPBuZoDd8GU4u5bQOP083qnbmLVY7_KVLuzWgVijmXd2exyMw22Kku0leLP-B-TdmMZ3UyABujgByj7OvwsaEeTI1u1-Y7gIQ6RSQtsQrG/s320/vlcsnap-2018-12-04-16h45m38s238.png" width="320" /></a></div>
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<i><span style="background-color: white; color: white;">Love it</span></i></div>
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Season 1 is quite wonderful. It starts off with the return of BJ's nemesis Sheriff Lobo. He comes back two more times, with the final episode of the season being a backdoor pilot for his show. Throughout the rest of the season, we get variations on the basic formula. Some serious, some silly, some rednecky, one of them scary-ish. This block of episodes isn't perfect but it is very good. A few of the problems I can think of: <a href="http://polishamericanguyreviews.blogspot.com/2015/04/bj-and-bear-s1-e5-never-give-trucker.html" target="_blank"><i>Never Give A Trucker An Even Break</i></a> is over-complicated. There are too many things going on for its own good. <a href="http://polishamericanguyreviews.blogspot.com/2015/05/bj-and-bear-s1-e9-crackers.html" target="_blank"><i>Crackers</i></a> peaks with the Ferris Wheel rescue about halfway through. The rest of the episode is bland in comparison. <a href="http://polishamericanguyreviews.blogspot.com/2015/03/bj-and-bear-s1-ep3-coffin-with-view.html" target="_blank">A Coffin With A View</a> is lots of fun but no one bothered to write the final third or so, which is unfortunate. Apart from these small peeves and maybe a couple other things, the season works very nicely. This is a world worthy of continued exploration.<br />
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<i>Those were the days</i></div>
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Season 2 is the only full season of the show. It has its definite high points. But, it also shows that the formula of the show already is wearing a bit thin. The producers may have known this, which could be why they introduced Country Comfort. A truck stop with semi-regular characters that don't appear in every episode but show up every once in a while. It's not tying BJ down. It's giving him some friends. I think it works. (Janet Julian, ahoy!) However, they get rid of it about halfway through the season for whatever reason. The episodes themselves are an uneven lot, as many hour-long shows of this time where. (It was a rare show from around now, like say<i> The Rockford Files</i>, that could come up with extended, consistent runs of excellent episodes.) The <a href="http://polishamericanguyreviews.blogspot.com/2016/02/bj-bear-s2-e1-snow-white-and-seven-lady.html" target="_blank">opening two-parter</a> introduces a ton of characters, brand new police nemeses and a whole slew of plots and subplots. It's all a bit much. I like some of it but there are parts that I find confusing bordering on incoherent.<br />
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<i>Gosh, remember that...</i></div>
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<i>Whatever happened to Michael Arkin?</i></div>
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Then, there are quite a few wonderful episodes. The <a href="http://polishamericanguyreviews.blogspot.com/2016/12/bj-and-bear-s2-e12-silent-night-unholy.html" target="_blank">Christmas</a> episode.<i> <a href="http://polishamericanguyreviews.blogspot.com/2016/06/bj-and-bear-s2-e5-cains-son-in-law.html" target="_blank">Cain's Son-In-Law</a>.</i> The<i> <a href="http://polishamericanguyreviews.blogspot.com/2016/07/bj-and-bear-s2-e5-run-for-money-part-1.html" target="_blank">Run For The Money</a></i> three part crossover. (That has a slew of characters and lots of plots and subplots but gets it right.) The <a href="http://polishamericanguyreviews.blogspot.com/2016/08/bj-and-bear-s2-e7-eyes-of-texas.html" target="_blank">two</a> <a href="http://polishamericanguyreviews.blogspot.com/2017/07/bj-and-bear-s2-e19-girls-on-hollywood.html" target="_blank">fun</a> episodes with the lady detectives. And others. (Check out the reviews to see what I liked and didn't.) The season gave us not only Country Comfort and the detectives but <a href="http://polishamericanguyreviews.blogspot.com/2016/06/bj-and-bear-s2-e4-pogo-lil.html" target="_blank">Pogo</a> <a href="http://polishamericanguyreviews.blogspot.com/2017/06/bj-and-bear-s2-e13-fire-in-hole.html" target="_blank">Lil</a> in two episodes. Not particularly good episodes but still... Then, there were the rather non-descript episodes like the one with the elephant or the dull<i> <a href="http://polishamericanguyreviews.blogspot.com/2016/11/bj-and-bear-s2-e11-fly-wild-horse.html" target="_blank">Fly A Wild Horse</a></i>. Then, there's<i> <a href="http://polishamericanguyreviews.blogspot.com/2017/06/bj-and-bear-s2-e17-bj-and-witch.html" target="_blank">BJ and the Witch</a></i>. I've said my peace there, though. Overall the season is worth watching. But, by the end, when BJ goes on vacation, even he seems to be saying "This format/ formula is pretty much worn out."<br />
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<div style="text-align: center;">
<i>When it's time to change...</i></div>
<br />
So, Season 3 gives it a change. Unfortunately, not the best of changes. They took the best parts of Country Comfort, put it in a boring disco and an office and grounded the show. If you want to talk too many characters, this is the season to go to. It all could have worked though. All it took was one of the writers to step up to the plate and write an episode that declared "This is how this new format should work. This is how we make it good." But, no one seemed really interested in doing that. Maybe it was fatigue. Maybe the cancellation writing was on the wall. Maybe nobody liked the format. The season isn't a bad one but it isn't stellar. It feels rather tired with only a few moments here and there that perk up.<br />
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<i>Thank you, guys.</i></div>
<br />
And that, my friends, is<i> BJ and the Bear</i>. All my thoughts on it. I'm worn out. Is it a good show? Certainly. Is it a great show? Well... at times. At moments. But, I think such a conglomeration of topical pop culture elements isn't really something that goes for "great." I feel "entertaining" is what they were after. Is this show entertaining? It sure is. It becomes less entertaining as it goes along but never fully abandons its remit. Although, some of the core elements are looking Pop Culture Stale by 1981. I'd say check out<i> The Foundlings</i>. It's very, very good. Give the first season a try. From the second season on, you may want to pick and chose. You may try watching it in tandem with<i> Lobo</i>. That might do something.<br />
<br />
I think you should give the show a shot. It's made me happy and I hope you all have enjoyed the reviews. If this were an episode of the show, Bear would suddenly appear at my computer dressed like me and there'd be a freeze frame.<br />
<br />
Let's pretend that has happened. Freeze... frame.... Now.<br />
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Daniel B?http://www.blogger.com/profile/15523815647063071939noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5016594272815403008.post-47713041176992936322018-12-03T15:59:00.004-08:002018-12-03T15:59:51.816-08:00BJ and the Bear Season 3 RecapMost of what I have to say about the episodes is, obviously, in the reviews. I just wanted to make a quick pass over the whole season before we wrap up the show in full.<br />
<br />
Returning for its third season to falling ratings, the show gave itself (or was told to from on high) a "soft reboot." No more was this going to be<i> Route 66</i> with a guy, a chimp and a truck. This was going to be like most shows. It would have a static main setting and then branch out from there. The added addition here was the 9 (!) new supporting cast members with 8 (!) of them featured in the opening credits. Seven lady truckers who are working with B.J. Plus, Grant and Stieger, the final batch of crooked cops that B.J. would come up against. The opening credits that now cram in all these characters is initially jarring. Who the heck are all these people? We had all the Country Comfort gang in the previous season but none of them were in the opening credits. That must mean that this new gang is going to be important. Let's see how they handle all of these people and the new set-up.<br />
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Unfortunately, the answer to how they handle it is: They have no idea. The initial <a href="http://polishamericanguyreviews.blogspot.com/2018/03/bj-and-bear-s3-e1-bj-seven-lady-truckers.html" target="_blank">2 hour episode</a>, which should set this new world up nicely, is structured awkwardly. I described it in-depth in the review but I'll mention it again here. The episode begins with BJ working for these seven women at a carnival. Someone steals B.J.'s rig. All their equipment is stolen. The group breaks up. That's the first, I forget, 20 minutes or so. Then, B.J.'s friend, who runs a trucking company, is incapacitated by the same guy who stole BJ's rig. So, BJ takes over the company and has to hire the seven gals to help him with a big haul. So, we initially meet the gals. They separate. Then, BJ has to bring them all back together again. It's very cumbersome and doesn't actually help us differentiate the gals all that much. In fact, it makes for a pretty monotonous episode, sadly.<br />
<br />
The rest of the season is pretty hit and miss. The writers seem to have no idea how to use all of the new characters at once. The few times they try, like in <a href="http://polishamericanguyreviews.blogspot.com/2018/08/bj-and-bear-s3-e10-seven-lady-captives.html" target="_blank"><i>Seven Lady Captives</i></a>, ends up with them becoming sort of a faceless mass of people in distress. It works better when 2 or 3 of them are focused on, along with BJ. The twins seem like they may be a main focus but they fade as the season goes along. It's really Callie and Stacks who get the bulk of the stuff to do. Stacks is charming. Callie, apart from a few moments, is annoying. Not who I would have chosen. The other three gals really don't register much. Grant's daughter comes into play in relation to Grant. (And the few episodes without Grant are kind of a relief.) One of the gals was a DJ and the other rode a motorcycle. I've even forgotten their names now. (They're in the reviews, generally.) It just feels as if the idea to change the format was made and no one really liked it or knew what to do with it. Or maybe they just knew the show was going out so they didn't try. Apart from a few episodes (like<i> <a href="http://polishamericanguyreviews.blogspot.com/2018/08/bj-and-bear-s3-e7-blond-in-gilded-cell.html" target="_blank">Blond In A Gilded Cell</a></i>,<i> <a href="http://polishamericanguyreviews.blogspot.com/2018/11/bj-and-bear-s3-e12-who-is-bj.html" target="_blank">Who is BJ?</a>, <a href="http://polishamericanguyreviews.blogspot.com/2018/10/bj-and-bear-s3-e11-stunt.html" target="_blank">S.T.U.N.T.</a></i> and<i> <a href="http://polishamericanguyreviews.blogspot.com/2018/11/bj-and-bear-s3-e13-detective-finger-i.html" target="_blank">Detective Finger, I Presume?</a></i>), it sadly doesn't work.<br />
<br />
The other big "Oops!" in the new set-up is the producers forgetting that one of the standard draws of each episode was the romance that BJ would have with a lady he met along the way. Luckily, there are seven new female supporting leads. But, it becomes clear in the <a href="http://polishamericanguyreviews.blogspot.com/2018/04/bj-and-bear-s3-e2-fast-and-furious.html" target="_blank">second episode</a> that they're not going to have BJ fool around with his employees. So, in order to satisfy the "BJ and a lady" thing, they'll have to bring in ANOTHER lady for those episodes. Sometimes it works, sometimes it's too much in a season that already has too much in it.<br />
<br />
The season does get better as it goes. And, Grant getting arrested at the end of the series promises that maybe things might be different if it had come back for more. But then, I have to ask myself: If they are getting this format down and they did come back, is it one that I wanted to keep watching? I like to think they'd get it right after a time and my answer would be "Yes." But, I love the first season too much. And I think the second season has so much great stuff in it. Having BJ settle down is a mistake. Maybe the fourth season would have seen him hit the road again. I don't know. The frustrating thing is simply this: why change the format if no one seems to know or care how to make it work? The strikes in the summer of 1980 gave them extra time to work out something great. This isn't, say,<i> Galactica 1980</i> bad by any stretch. At least three or four of these episodes rank near the best of<i> BJ and the Bear</i>. Unfortunately, some of the others are on the bottom.<br />
<br />
I'm running myself in circles here. They tried something. It got cancelled before we saw if it really worked. Personally, even if it did, it wasn't a format I was enamored with. (And, hey, where did B.J.'s friend go? I thought BJ was just taking over temporarily.) I'd like to say I'd have stuck around because I like BJ, Bear and Stacks. And the general format change itself isn't really that different. There's still beautiful ladies, car chases, action, "comedy," and all the <i>BJ and the Bear</i> stuff that I love. It's kind of shackled now by this format. I would have loved the show to go on for ten more years. But, it ends here. The least of the seasons but not without some charms. Not enough Bear, though.Daniel B?http://www.blogger.com/profile/15523815647063071939noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5016594272815403008.post-90691090995073218972018-11-04T00:30:00.000-07:002018-11-07T10:30:18.247-08:00BJ AND THE BEAR S3 E14: The Two Million Dollar Hustle<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<div style="text-align: center;">
<i>One last time!</i></div>
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<br />
Originally aired on May 9, 1981<br />
Directed by David G. Phinney<br />
Teleplay by Tom Sawyer and Robert L. McCullough & Michael Halperin<br />
Story by Tom Sawyer<br />
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Grant frames Samantha, Angie and Stacks for a 2 million dollar bank robbery. BJ gradually uncovers that there is an investigation about to occur at SCAT and Grant may get in trouble. So, Grant, with the help of some strippers he has under his thumb, committed the robbery and is planning on running away with the money. BJ enlists the help of Lt. Steiger to help him stop Grant for one final time.<br />
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<div style="text-align: center;">
<i>That's a whole lot of set-up for about two minutes of show</i></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<i>And yet, Stacks</i></div>
<br />
I know that<i> BJ and the Bear</i> was one of the shows that the Moral Majority had the biggest problem with. This might be the episode they were thinking of. Lots of women in bikinis, strippers and a woman in lingerie near the end who actually tops all the other women that have been in every episode of this show in terms of "Holy Moley!" The whole time that this pulchritude is going on the episode is trying to make itself feel like it is the Last Episode. It is and it mostly succeeds.<br />
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<i>It's a little tough to see...</i></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<i>But, the gals are watching themselves run by</i></div>
<i></i><br />
This is one of those TV shows where the bad guy keeps getting away with it even when the good guy always wins. Lobo never got in more than a little trouble when he was on the show. Wiley and the Fox never got in trouble. But, surprisingly, Grant - SPOILER!!! - gets caught in the end. The final chase for BJ and his rig is against the small plane that Grant is trying to escape in. When he gets caught, definitively, it is a weird moment. It's not the sort of thing that happens in this show and, because this is the last episode, it is appreciated. I wonder if the strange writer credit has something to do with this. Maybe Tom wrote the original script with Grant getting away. Then, seeing the writing on the wall, Mike and Bob re-wrote it to bring that plotline to a conclusion. If the show had continued, Steiger could have taken Grant's place. Maybe? Maybe.<br />
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<div style="text-align: center;">
<i>Sassy stripper</i></div>
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<div style="text-align: center;">
<i>Sad stripper</i></div>
<i></i><br />
The episode itself is a decent ending to the series. It has a feeling of darkness to it that hasn't been here for a while. The stripper that Grant recruits has a definite sadness to her. Grant's exploiting of her comes of as maybe the sleaziest thing in the show since<i> The Foundlings</i>. Almost. The shot of her face as she takes off her top is significant in some way. I'm not sure exactly how but I know it is. Also, Cindy has a very final conversation with her father, Grant, which I found rather sad.. And, the fact that they can't get the gals out of jail (even with the help of Callie's Uncle Barney who's a lawyer) is a little disheartening. No one good has ever been in jail as long as the gals are here.<br />
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<div style="text-align: center;">
<i>Uncle Barney!</i></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<i>(Backdoor pilot for The Uncle Barney Show?)</i></div>
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<div style="text-align: center;">
<i>Hey, its Deke!*</i></div>
<i></i><br />
That's not to say that this is all doom and gloom. There are several scenes where Steiger and BJ set about making Grant look like the jackass that he really is. There's a bar where they rig everyone to pretend like Grant is a regular lush there. (I believe it is "Dino's Lounge.") Then, there's the WOW! lady at the motel who claims her and Grant meet up three times a week. It's a decent plan. It's slightly over-complicating things, though. I never fully understood exactly what they were up to as they simply catch Grant running away in the end. I almost feel like the "discredit Grant" plotline was meant to be written out of the final script but someone forgot.<br />
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<div style="text-align: center;">
<i>Oh hell! It's Angry BJ</i></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<i><br /></i></div>
<i></i>With all the Grant and Steiger stuff mixed with the scenes between Callie and her uncle, BJ and Bear almost get left behind. But, they get some good moments. Angry BJ going to see the stripper is a good scene. (Although, it leaves one with the feeling that she's just traded one person who will use her for another.) There's also a mobster who Grant stole from in here. (Grant's plan is more complicated than I've let on but we'll be all right.) He sends goons after BJ. BJ gets in one last brawl with the goons. Then, he confronts the mobster in a cool scene. As the curtain closes, these moments are almost wistful.<br />
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<div style="text-align: center;">
<i>Good Gravy! </i></div>
<i></i><br />
But, yeah, this last episode is kind of more concerned with everyone else and leaves BJ and Bear behind a bit. Technically, with the new format, this is probably where they should have gone with it. Putting BJ in the position of a character like The Virginian. He's omni-present but he isn't always physically present. That could have been the route for the show to go. There are so many lead characters, after all. Granted, this isn't the show I would have been terribly interested in watching but they gave it a shot here.<br />
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<div style="text-align: center;">
<i>One last chase</i></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<i>Car v. Plane</i></div>
<i></i><br />
And so,<i> BJ and the Bear</i> ends. In a very different place than where it began. But, BJ is still heroic and hunky. Bear is still goofy. The rig is still awesome. Sometimes they still do trucking stuff! But, the new format never quite gelled as it should have. So, possibly, this was as good a place as any to leave Mr McKay and his best friend, Bear. They'll keep having adventures and having good times. We just won't be able to enjoy them anymore. It's sad. But, all good things....<br />
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<i>Sto lat!</i></div>
<i></i><br />
Goodbye, BJ. Goodbye, Bear. You were thoroughly enjoyed.<br />
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<div style="text-align: center;">
<i>Steiger got the final freeze frame?</i></div>
<i></i><i></i><i></i><i></i><i></i><i></i><i></i><br />
*??Daniel B?http://www.blogger.com/profile/15523815647063071939noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5016594272815403008.post-32624524402325314352018-11-03T12:53:00.001-07:002018-11-03T12:53:22.226-07:00BJ AND THE BEAR S3 E13: Detective Finger, I Presume?<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br />
Originally aired on May 2, 1981<br />
Directed by Gil Bettman<br />
Written by Robert L. McCullough<br />
<br />
Two people break into BJ's office and steal a painting valued at $400,000. (BJ was delivering it to a SF museum the next day.) There have been a series of burglaries in the area and they seem to tie-in to an all women's gym called The Globe Gym. Cindy and Stacks go undercover at the gym. They learn that the owner, Stella Lemke, with the help of a Capt. Dryer, frame the women and make them commit burglaries. But, don't worry Detective Finger is on the case!<br />
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<i>I haven't been the same since Mary left me</i></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgj_d9vucCNHxHnqoI4eavk-ZufNU0U7XCt32ESF4TGp54KWKvriWcSmWVHm0wRuf8sacCaAnKraB59431RVaS-TpT4yv7RZMliaETbe8LsJkbUjtqIgxFphLbIcVdu9b0oGf_p_wtWMQoq/s1600/vlcsnap-2018-11-03-11h39m35s696.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><i></i><img border="0" data-original-height="480" data-original-width="640" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgj_d9vucCNHxHnqoI4eavk-ZufNU0U7XCt32ESF4TGp54KWKvriWcSmWVHm0wRuf8sacCaAnKraB59431RVaS-TpT4yv7RZMliaETbe8LsJkbUjtqIgxFphLbIcVdu9b0oGf_p_wtWMQoq/s320/vlcsnap-2018-11-03-11h39m35s696.png" width="320" /></a></div>
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<i>Det. Lt. Finger, The Last of the American Hoboes?</i></div>
<i></i><br />
Finally, a cop who isn't crooked! Well, technically, Cain wasn't crooked but he sure wasn't a good time. Detective Finger initially appears to be the same as every other cop on the show. He doesn't believe BJ. He thinks the painting (if it even exists) and BJ are involved in some sort of insurance fraud. He's a douchenozzle. But, as the episode goes on, he believes BJ more and more. And, in the end, they're actually friends, which was a surprise but also very nice to see. As the series draws to a close, I like the thought that they've brought in a cop who can be BJ and the Gals ally, if need be.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgnVzgo8cuqMnnEM4Hg0hyphenhyphenB_WaHC9CAneOuZwhBb6QOHH7kZOhnqpT7b_EoLcGHNA-loXDRoU22Z4mnHkqiHufnpx7trJzrosOAAsod3Ti0DMY75BYBALbttHgIG0bMxuzX1_Q1slxWUk70/s1600/vlcsnap-2018-11-03-11h38m50s300.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="480" data-original-width="640" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgnVzgo8cuqMnnEM4Hg0hyphenhyphenB_WaHC9CAneOuZwhBb6QOHH7kZOhnqpT7b_EoLcGHNA-loXDRoU22Z4mnHkqiHufnpx7trJzrosOAAsod3Ti0DMY75BYBALbttHgIG0bMxuzX1_Q1slxWUk70/s320/vlcsnap-2018-11-03-11h38m50s300.png" width="320" /></a></div>
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<i>That extra is having the best time ever</i></div>
<i></i><br />
Speaking of cops, I think I see Officer Norberg undercover at The Globe Gym. It's Peter Lupus, everyone! He gets to be big and menacing. He has a pretty good fight with BJ that starts with him throwing a dumbbell at him. (No, I don't mean Officer Perkins.) I always like seeing him and I always forget he was in<i> Muscle Beach Party</i>.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj5sxpqOYd6WNMvgf7M-PRajnuk-8k6MCo5HzYvGvM3-T-_6Qb2Rq1gLwli0mulRRRyiykBIPTHAuJS-TyyYz9cQn-pMLUST-rrNF8vzoPnDswpRSynt4m-uk-HCg_F-I6mzhTznxovhJB3/s1600/vlcsnap-2018-11-03-11h41m55s026.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="480" data-original-width="640" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj5sxpqOYd6WNMvgf7M-PRajnuk-8k6MCo5HzYvGvM3-T-_6Qb2Rq1gLwli0mulRRRyiykBIPTHAuJS-TyyYz9cQn-pMLUST-rrNF8vzoPnDswpRSynt4m-uk-HCg_F-I6mzhTznxovhJB3/s320/vlcsnap-2018-11-03-11h41m55s026.png" width="320" /></a></div>
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<i>There's a joke about "going undercover" here</i></div>
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<i>Frankly, it's eluding me & I'm OK with that</i></div>
<i></i><i></i><br />
This is the episode where it is officially stated that Grant is "the top cop in the state." I don't know what that says about California law enforcement but that doesn't sound good for anyone. How on Earth does he get that high up? He's not like Lobo who does crooked stuff in a small town. He's the "top cop" in one of the most populated and largest states in the US. Holy Moley! SCAT is a lot bigger than I thought.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg9yI910bYisIBxAJ_p71rbp9bsmXSo69XobzOAGvo5VsY9o7kBWVKy4BSxiuTB4GxCaaw_JC5Wr1DW48vYGBDr154FkVNzBNa3xgm5EJ6915lMT01Mkf6e0QL2VsWWTSbJjldtERZdUXig/s1600/vlcsnap-2018-11-03-11h43m33s974.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="480" data-original-width="640" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg9yI910bYisIBxAJ_p71rbp9bsmXSo69XobzOAGvo5VsY9o7kBWVKy4BSxiuTB4GxCaaw_JC5Wr1DW48vYGBDr154FkVNzBNa3xgm5EJ6915lMT01Mkf6e0QL2VsWWTSbJjldtERZdUXig/s320/vlcsnap-2018-11-03-11h43m33s974.png" width="320" /></a></div>
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<i>SCAT Officer McKay!</i></div>
<i></i><br />
Cindy and Stacks going undercover is a nice thread. Stacks is constantly worried. Cindy is a tough gal. I missed her. Let me say it again: They really haven't figured out what the heck they're doing with all these gals. The twins are here but do nothing but look great in short shorts. Angie and Samantha are nowhere in sight. (I think. I don't remember them being here.) Callie is here, as always. But this episode is an odd one for her. BJ spends most of his time kind of flirting with her and wanting to dance with her and... Normally, she annoys him. What happened? My guess is that Linda McCullough, who plays Callie, is related to the person who wrote this episode. And the writer has very strong thoughts about his relative getting the best attention from the star of the show. I could be all wrong though.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjbWk4U3QNiK-QznC13lBhv9VDX717KVdNFkpWD6oT6WasfBkvG10FV7tk58YV7SQHd0Pf8Gv_xsRkVmpbcjzj7Bl97vWTUqLuqvvRIfxFvvEgTeHgvcn2LAe0G8NfUYzvUlQtrRJRg4Bbw/s1600/vlcsnap-2018-11-03-11h38m10s852.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="480" data-original-width="640" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjbWk4U3QNiK-QznC13lBhv9VDX717KVdNFkpWD6oT6WasfBkvG10FV7tk58YV7SQHd0Pf8Gv_xsRkVmpbcjzj7Bl97vWTUqLuqvvRIfxFvvEgTeHgvcn2LAe0G8NfUYzvUlQtrRJRg4Bbw/s320/vlcsnap-2018-11-03-11h38m10s852.png" width="320" /></a></div>
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<i>BJ NEEDS to dance with Callie!</i></div>
<br />
The episode isn't as good as the previous two. It lacks the excitement of<i> S.T.U.N.T.</i> It lacks the crazy, propulsive oddness of<i> Who is BJ?</i> It's pretty much what I imagine would be a standard episode of the show if it had kept going with this format. BJ comes up against the cops. A few of the gals participate. BJ does better detective work than the police. Grant gets involved somehow. In the end, everything is OK if not better than before. One interesting thing: I couldn't really see this episode working as a 1st or 2nd season show. There's too much involvement from the gals for that. Hope looms.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj-LxdXw_gqvA47l6Uy5CVe6YyWuVY3-ihw5MteEMg7g2cSOfuktPx1T3ORcG65FB_c35JhIZqFFXDE-T4wsfjacYXqHDlUVfJ1O5MEXFi-YkAjYj7iP9Wxm_lz7ztntbBNsf0hc6MAx-Lp/s1600/vlcsnap-2018-11-03-11h40m45s348.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="480" data-original-width="640" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj-LxdXw_gqvA47l6Uy5CVe6YyWuVY3-ihw5MteEMg7g2cSOfuktPx1T3ORcG65FB_c35JhIZqFFXDE-T4wsfjacYXqHDlUVfJ1O5MEXFi-YkAjYj7iP9Wxm_lz7ztntbBNsf0hc6MAx-Lp/s320/vlcsnap-2018-11-03-11h40m45s348.png" width="320" /></a></div>
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<i>Look. The director lingered on this shot</i></div>
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<i>I'm just a writer looking for good screenshots.</i></div>
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<i>Talk to Gil!</i></div>
<i></i><br />
Where the episode wins is in the undercover stuff and Detective Finger. Cindy and Stacks do some gymnastics, which is cool. Detective Finger goes undercover as a hobo at one point, which wins all the awards for awesome in my book. Plus, again, he actually listens to BJ in the end. Thank God! I'm not 100% sure why they make him and his partner Sgt. Williams so incompetent when they're trying to foil a liquor store robbery but hey this is "action comedy<i> BJ and the Bear</i>." There's your action and there's your comedy.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEido6JDtTT90krw465NEi7aP0Jr11ahIvbw6-jZnZiZzgu0LK7Zhyphenhyphen7e6f0OHv1ssL48b3lc_sftMfPyeY6aFnwI7kjrJ8h1t9cOeRAFAmcntoVbFWn2Pnroeueszd1-9pjoFwoeEgkFOQPo/s1600/vlcsnap-2018-11-03-11h45m50s043.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="480" data-original-width="640" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEido6JDtTT90krw465NEi7aP0Jr11ahIvbw6-jZnZiZzgu0LK7Zhyphenhyphen7e6f0OHv1ssL48b3lc_sftMfPyeY6aFnwI7kjrJ8h1t9cOeRAFAmcntoVbFWn2Pnroeueszd1-9pjoFwoeEgkFOQPo/s320/vlcsnap-2018-11-03-11h45m50s043.png" width="320" /></a></div>
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<i>Grant Meets Finger!</i></div>
<i></i><br />
It's not a great episode. But, if this is where the show was moving towards, it's not a bad one. They still haven't cracked the format they created for the show. But, it feels like they might be getting near it. Unfortunately, the next episode is the last one. I know. It makes me sad too. It's been a long journey. I'll see you there.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhnv4H-hSj7vUI8x_AicqPQjMwZSDqdFNkdt8x6EJm4TOYetdZyBdjlvuwLZU6o-cL6bL0BHWeuwLJbsecKEghyphenhyphenxBaSKWPeSpMHaIdunKyxDPXdTYVFTeK3ZRy1bEKFcxQio4Kzp2BCMbuq/s1600/vlcsnap-2018-11-03-11h46m09s842.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="480" data-original-width="640" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhnv4H-hSj7vUI8x_AicqPQjMwZSDqdFNkdt8x6EJm4TOYetdZyBdjlvuwLZU6o-cL6bL0BHWeuwLJbsecKEghyphenhyphenxBaSKWPeSpMHaIdunKyxDPXdTYVFTeK3ZRy1bEKFcxQio4Kzp2BCMbuq/s320/vlcsnap-2018-11-03-11h46m09s842.png" width="320" /></a></div>
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<i>I liked this ending</i></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiIek2X3v5GjOCJqfoH342_RWDWxH4e9EHKrJgEFqi4CKfq5koDXVyfn7ZTX6aMSq50ue7wGGLmglUHquYzRYNkSJIzv7ugo1ils7OzX-oxGR1mVXqiC3ykkjQFnWanXRqjHfUuroFGBtNu/s1600/vlcsnap-2018-11-03-11h49m51s656.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><i></i><img border="0" data-original-height="480" data-original-width="640" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiIek2X3v5GjOCJqfoH342_RWDWxH4e9EHKrJgEFqi4CKfq5koDXVyfn7ZTX6aMSq50ue7wGGLmglUHquYzRYNkSJIzv7ugo1ils7OzX-oxGR1mVXqiC3ykkjQFnWanXRqjHfUuroFGBtNu/s320/vlcsnap-2018-11-03-11h49m51s656.png" width="320" /></a></div>
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<i>And I loved this ending</i></div>
Daniel B?http://www.blogger.com/profile/15523815647063071939noreply@blogger.com0